


Family Matters

by World_of_AUs



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:33:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 73,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24267487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/World_of_AUs/pseuds/World_of_AUs
Summary: You should have heeded your father’s warnings to stay away, now HIS demons have come to collect, and they come in the form of the Notorious mob boss James Buchanan Barnes, but is there more than meets the eye?
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader
Comments: 34
Kudos: 219





	1. Series Preview

**Author's Note:**

> New Series!

Your eyes are drawn to the outside world of the cab you sit in, dark grey clouds are lingering in the  washed-out pale white of the sky. The streets are empty, quiet, except for the one or two cars that pass you by. You had sworn you would never return, promised yourself that you would never look back the night your father kicked you from you warm Brooklyn home. You remembered standing on the puddled stairs looking up at your father with wide eyes, your bags tossed out next to you. You wanted to cry, to scream out to your mother, but your father blocked her cowering form from you.

“ _ Dad please don’t do this, why are you doing this?” you pleaded through your tears. _

_ Your dad wouldn’t answer as he continued to throw more bags that your mother had packed for you at your feet. _

_ “Mom please,” you cried, “please tell dad something, please don’t let him do this,”  _

_ The only part of your mother that you could see were her feet, and you swore your heart broke in two the moment you saw them turn away from you. _

_ “dad why  _ _ are _ _ you doing this?” you tried again. This time you reached out for him, only to have him pull himself from you as if you had burned him. _

_ “Leave,” he hissed,  _ _ “you _ _ leave this city and don’t you ever come back you hear, don’t you ever come back,” _

_ Through tear filled eyes, you watched your father turn his back on you, the oak door of your home slamming behind him as he left you out in the cold. _

That night as you walked through the cold brisk weather, you had vowed to heed your father’s words. Yet here you sat in the backseat of a New York cab, driving down the now unfamiliar roads to your old Brooklyn home.


	2. Past

Your eyes are drawn to the outside world of the cab you sit in, dark grey clouds are lingering in the washed-out pale white of the sky. The streets are empty, quiet, except for the one or two cars that pass you by. You had sworn you would never return, promised yourself that you would never look back the night your father kicked you from you warm Brooklyn home. You remembered standing on the puddled stairs looking up at your father with wide eyes, your bags tossed out next to you. You wanted to cry, to scream out to your mother, but your father blocked her cowering form from you.

“ _ Dad please don’t do this, why are you doing this?” you pleaded through your tears. _

_ Your dad wouldn’t answer as he continued to throw more bags that your mother had packed for you at your feet. _

_ “Mom please,” you cried, “please tell dad something, please don’t let him do this,”  _

_ The only part of your mother that you could see were her feet, and you swore your heart broke in two the moment you saw them turn away from you. _

_ “dad why are you doing this?” you tried again. This time you reached out for him, only to have him pull himself from you as if you had burned him. _

_ “Leave,” he hissed, “you leave this city and don’t you ever come back you hear, don’t you ever come back,” _

_ Through tear filled eyes, you watched your father turn his back on you, the oak door of your home slamming behind him as he left you out in the cold. _

That night as you walked through the cold brisk weather, you had vowed to heed your father’s words. Yet here you sat in the backseat of a New York cab, driving down the now unfamiliar roads to your old Brooklyn home.

_ It  _ _ had  _ _ been the _ _ early hours of the morning when your phone had trilled  _ _ noisily on your night stand. You had groaned opting to bury your head a little deeper into the  _ _ warm  _ _ sheets of your bed, hoping that whoever was calling would  _ _ hang up after the first few rings ha _ _ d _ _ gone unanswered. Luck had not been on your side as your phone continued to trill vibrating noisily  _ _ the longer it sat untouched.  _

_ You had thrown the covers from your head  _ _ angrily,  _ _ vulgarities slipping from your tired lips as you grabbed your phone off the night stand. You didn’t bother looking at the caller ID intent on giving the person calling you at three in the morning a piece of your mind. _

_ Your words failed you as you heard the voice on the other end of the li _ _ ne, _ __ _ catching you off guard. _

_ “Good  _ _ morning, I’m sorry for disrupting you so early _ _ , _ _ this is detective  _ _ Stark _ _ ,  _ _ am I speaking with y/f/n y/l/n?” _

_ “Y-yes, may I ask what the reason for the call is?” You questioned  _ _ worriedly _ _. _

_ “ _ _ I am calling in regards to your parents Miss y/l/n _ _ , there’s been an accident,” a heavy sigh, _ _ your heart dropped into your stomach, _ _ “I’m sorry but there were no survivors,” _

_ Your breath caught in your throat,  _ _ tears swarmed your eyes, _ _ your fingers  _ _ turning _ _ stark white from the grip on your device. _

_ “Miss,  _ _ are you there,” his words echoed and vibrated around in your _ __ _ disoriented mind. _

**_ Your parents, accident, no survivors. _ **

_ A choked sob fell from your lips, no this couldn’t be, it just couldn’t be real, this had to be another cruel joke life was playing. _

_ You could hear the detectives worried murmur of your name repeatedly but you couldn’t bring yourself to get the words out that you  _ _ were okay, though you were far from it. _

_ You weren’t sure how long you sat there _ _ in your now cold bed, _ _ the phone clutched numbly to your ear, detective  _ _ Stark _ __ _ on the other side of the line  _ _ trying to  _ _ guide you through your breathing,  _ _ it took minutes but felt like hours before you  _ _ felt like your breathing had evened out significantly for you to even get a word in. _

_ Detective  _ _ Stark _ _ was speaking up again, _ _ his voice sounding far off and hazy, “Ms.  _ _ y/l/n, I know this must be devastating news, but I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind meeting with me, I have a few questions for you _ _ in regards to your parents _ _.” _

_ In your disheveled mind you hadn’t quiet processed his request, nor the tone to his voice, all you could do in your numb state is agree to meet him early morning later this week. _

“We’ll be pulling up soon miss,” the cab driver  announced pulling you from your thoughts. You found your body sitting a little straighter as  you  drove past the various houses that you remember once seeing, it was almost a distant memory looking at them now.

The cab driver drove a little further before pulling onto a street your home just houses down,  your  breath caught in your throat as your family home came into view, a patrol car sitting out front.

“You can just pull up here,” you murmured, eyes focused on the patrol car.

The cab pulled into the familiar driveway coming to a stop at the peak, once in park you handed the man the money unbuckling yourself from the car before sliding out. A million feelings hit you at once as your feet touched the cemented pathway you once walked , you held the tears at bay as you looked at the brick home , memories of your time here swarming you.

The cab driver left the bags by your feet, the motion alone almost throwing you over the edge , it seemed almost too familiar , but you had to remind yourself , you  weren’t that  freshly young adult that had been thrown out onto the streets. Thanking your driver  quietly with a shaky voice you  composed yourself, your eyes locked on the estate in front of you. Two car doors slamming jarred you, though your watery gaze was un-wavered, a second later you heard the soft clicks of another pair of feet approaching you. From the corner of your eye, you could see who you could only guess was Detective  Stark , his stance was much like yours though instead of the house, his eyes were on your shrunken form.

Whether it be that he knew you needed a few minutes to compose yourself, or he wasn’t sure how to approach you it remained like that for a few minutes, your eyes on the home, his eyes on you. Eventually his stare became too much and you turned your head ever so slightly, “Good morning Ms. Y/l/n, I’m sorry to have to meet on these terms, but the questions I have for you could help me determine what or rather who was the cause of your parent's accident.”

It seems your time to mourn would have to be held back a little longer, “I'll answer any questions you might have detective,”

“do the names Pierce, Rumlow, or Barnes sound familiar to you?” 

You looked up at him brow raised, “no, should they?” you questioned.

A loud sigh left the detectives lips his whole form changing before you, “look Ms. Y/l/n, the quicker you comply, the quicker I can get the right men in jail, but if you withhold any information, I can’t help you,”

Your body faltered slightly, his words and tone throwing you off, “I’m sorry Mr. Stark but I really have no idea what you’re talking about, I wasn’t even informed what the actual accident was that killed my parents but now you’re saying either of those three men could have had something to do with it?”

He slid closer, his frame hovering over yours, a fire in his eyes, “Look I'll only say this once more, cut the shit, if you know something, and I'm sure you do, you better start talking now, because then I can actually guarantee your safety.”

Your body staggered back, this couldn’t possibly be the detective you had spoken with the night of the accident could it, “sir I honestly have no idea what you’re talking about, I-”

“You have no idea what I'm talking about?” he grunted, “you had no idea daddy worked for the mafia, laundering money, did you really not question the men in clad suits that walked throughout your home, not question the packages that showed up on your door, were you and your mother really that good at lying for your father?” he hissed.

It’s like you had taken a hit to the chest, the air completely knocked from you, your mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water.

“ wh-what ?” you stuttered out.

Detective stark barked out a laugh, “man you all really are something, come on you don’t have to lie anymore, daddy isn’t here to keep you quiet like he kept your mom quiet.”

Had he not been a man of the law, your hand would have met his face this rainy morning, but instead it was clenched at your side, your once mournful eyes turning into slits, “listen here Detective Stark, I'm not sure what makes you think you have the right, to talk about either of my parents like that, especially my mother,” you hissed, “I have lost both my parents in one single night, I haven't seen either of them since my father kicked me out of my home at age 18, so how dare you talk to me in such a manner,” you growled.

Stark’s face fell, “m’am I’m so so-”

“and another thing, detective,” you muttered sarcastically, “if my father “worked” for the mafia like you’re accusing, I was unaware of it, the time that I lived in Brooklyn I never saw much of my father, he spent most of his days locked in that office of his, I was never to bother him, or question what it was he was doing in there,” you paused, taking in a shaky breath, “my mother would only tell me my father was a very busy man, and that if I wanted to continue to live the lifestyle I had, that I would leave my father alone and let him work, unless I wanted to be out on the streets.”

“Ms. -”

You held up your hand, “please detective,” you whispered, “I think you’ve said and done enough, if you’d please, I would like you to leave, I'm only here for a few day’s and do not wish to stay any longer than what I had planned, I'm only here to sort out my parents things and then I will be leaving,”

Detective stark let out a sigh, a silent “shit” falling from his lips, a hand running through his hair. “I truly am sorry, when I found out your parents had a daughter you, and you weren’t involved in the  car  accident, I needed to know what you knew, look I'm certain one of those three men I spoke of earlier had a hand in this, and I needed to know if you knew something, I'm so sorry I went about it the way I did, it was wrong and very unprofessional of me,”

You wiped under your eyes, “I appreciate the apology Mr. Stark and I wish I could tell you more, but I truly had no idea, there were never any signs my father was doing any of those things you accused him of, and if he did and you have the proof, it was during a time I was no longer living in this home,” your fingers twitched at your side anxiously.

“ I cannot express my apologies enough, as I said it was very unprofessional of me to have gone about it the way I did,” he sighed, “I think you have enough on your plate right now,  if you’d like to receive my report for your parents accident you can call the department and I’ll have the records ready for you to be picked up, and another thing if you  ever need anything Ms. Y/f/n y/l/n, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me,” he advised passing you a card.

You took it without so much as another word, you had truly had enough of this day and it hadn’t even passed in its entirety, who knew what other trouble you would be coming across. You saw detective stark off, only grabbing your bags and heading for the home when his patrol car was completely out of sight.

Walking up the steps you momentarily froze on the same spot you had last been here, a shiver rolled through your body as the memory reared its ugly head.

You shut your eyes, bags gripped tightly in your hands as you took a deep breath, it seemed this house only knew how to bring you un-welcomed pain.

Taking the last of the steps you reached for the spare key  in your ba g your grandmother had given you before she passed . Y ou could only hope your father hadn’t changed the lo cks with how long it had been from then to now. Thrusting the key into the lock you breathed a sigh of relief when the key turned , the doorknob turning with it. 

You let the door swing open squeakily on it hinges ,  a musky, earthy smell tickled your nose as you stood at the entryway. You stood on shaky legs as you took in your once warm home, now all you could feel was the coldness within it.

Laying your bags off to the side, you shut the door behind you sliding the locks into place with a soft ‘click’ . Hesitantly you walked farther into the home, bypassing the stairway and going down the darkened corridor , the one you weren’t allowed to step foot into.

With shaky breaths you continued down until you stopped just inches shy of those large forbidden oak doors.

Growing up in this home you had never questioned what your father did behind those doors, you just knew it was work as your mother so frequently had to remind you, and it was bringing in the money to upkeep your parents very wealthy lifestyle. You weren’t allowed to question the one or two suit clad men that walked through your home, weren’t allowed to ask what was in the large boxes they occasionally carried in, and you definitely weren’t allowed to play or go down this very corridor you stood in when more suit clad men whom were very important were in that office with your father. “They’re your father’s business partner’s” your mother would say.

As a child you never thought to question it, your mother wouldn’t allow it, your father would buy your mother’s silence, and in turn she would buy yours. When your incessant whining drove your father up the walls his voice would boom through the hall telling your mother to get you out of the house and fast.

Your mother would waste no time in gathering your things and rushing you out the door with the promises of a new toy, your favorite food from the diner down the street, or some  ice-cream .

Though as you grew through your adolescent years, it had grown easier on your mother to keep you quiet, a simple glare and a point the top of the stairs would have you on your way to the confines and safety of your room.

The more you sat and thought on the words Detective Stark had spoken to you this morning, the more they rang true to you. The men in clad suits, the large boxes, the various meetings he had, it was just all adding up now and the thought chilled you. The cherry on top had to have been the night he kicked you out, you hadn’t meant to, you knew being in this corridor when your father was working was off limits, and more so when he had a “client”.

You hadn’t thought anything of it the moment you chose to take those steps down the dimly lit corridor, you were upset, out raged that your father had demanded you stay locked away in your room. You thought you were simply being rebellious if just once, against your  father's wishes. Truth was you had grown bored of being locked away in your room, various guests having coming in and out of your house as the day had passed, and you had been asked very unpleasantly by your father to stay out of sight.

_You were just about to pass your fathers doors when you heard the shouting, “she’s just a girl how can you ask that of me, you don’t have the rights to give me those orders I work for your father not you” your father had growled._

_“you knew what would happen if any of my money went missing, and yet look what happened,” a pause, you were frozen waiting with baited breath, “my money went missing” the other voice growled._

_“I'm aware you work for my father, but you played dirty with what was mine, now you can either get me my money, or I'll come to collect when the time asks for it,” it hissed again._

_You were shaken up, scared, not bearing to hear anymore as you backed away as quickly and quietly as you could, you weren't sure what had gone down, nor did you know who the girl they had been speaking of had been, but you are certain of one thing it had been the night that had changed everything._

_You had raced up the stairs tucking tail, locking yourself away in your room. You were worried, had your father done something bad at work, had he stolen money from work, is that how he always had extra money? Oh how naïve you had been. That night you had sat perched on your bed, covers wrapped tightly around your shaking shoulders, eyes intently watching your door as your thoughts ran wildly._

_In a second it had all been swept from under your feet as your door was kicked in, your father standing at the doorway, eyes dangerously wild. He pointed at you like a deranged man, “get up!” he had growled. You remained frozen on the bed, eyes blown wide, he knew I was in the corridor you thought in fear. Your father growled at your unmoving form as he stormed over to you ripping you from the warmth and safety of your bed._

_“up!” he growled pushing you out of your room._

_You leaned against the railing of the stairs as you watched your father tear apart your room, you wanted to scream for you mother but you couldn’t find your voice. You watched in horror as your father continued to wreak havoc in your bedroom, eventually your mother’s petite form appeared your father screeching for her to help him. It all went so quickly from there, your father dragging your wailing form down the stairs, throwing you from the house, his warning._

To this day you still hadn’t understood any of it, you didn’t want to believe that your father had banished you from the house for you being in the corridor that night, but there was no other explanation, you had been in a place you shouldn’t have been, much like you were now. 

You should have heeded your father’s warning.


	3. Unfold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter two!

Taking a breath, you brought a shaky hand up to the bronze door knob, you were reluctant to twist it knowing it would more than likely be locked. These doors were always to remai n locked, regardless of whether your father was  attending to his business or not,  _ “I don’t need any rats snooping around my studies” _ __ he would hiss glaring at you and your mother, and as a child you never thought anything of it but as you grew,  you were right to heed those warnings or suffer the  w rath  of your father.

You twisted the knobs a shiver running down your spine when the door squeaked open. The door continued to swing open on its hinges while you stood there frozen, breath baited waiting to hear your fathers booming voice, but it never came. Hesitant steps drew you further into the room, shaky breaths slipped past your parted lips as you took in your father’s secret. Cold, dark, and eerie were just a few of the words that crossed your mind as you stood in your father's grand, luxurious, private space.

Looking at it now you couldn’t imagine your father having a hand in all the things Detective Stark had accused him of. You knew your father though, the type of man he was, he wouldn’t ever be caught with the like of mobsters, murderers, the sin of the city. At least you hoped you would have known him enough, but you were beginning to wonder if you ever did know who your father truly was.

Taking in more of the room your eyes finally fell on the substantially grand expansive flat-topped red wooden oak desk. Your eyes were drawn to the massive wooden structure, but what really caught your attention was the strewn stacks of manila folders and various paper work thrown around the top of it. Your feet carried you towards the desk, body rounding it as you stood in front of where you father was sure to have sat many times.

Shaky fingers ran through the strewn paper work, brows furrowing the deeper you got into it, there was various letter of foreclosures, dubious amounts of bank statements, and even the occasional printed email. You weren’t sure what any of it meant, but from the various red-penned markings you could only assume it wasn’t something in favor of your father. Pulling up the plush leather rolling chair you plopped your tense body into the chair, rolling yourself forward as you sorted once more through the paper s , your fingers gripping a foreclosure notice.

**_ Dear Mr. Y/l/n, _ **

**_ This letter is a formal notification that you are in default of your obligation to make payments on your home loan, account #1234567. The current account holds the sum of 5,000 payable May, 27, 2020. _ **

**_ The amount has been overdue since April 27,2020, you have ignored multiple requests to make a payment or reconsolidate your debt. _ **

**_ Unless the full amount is received within 15 days, we have no choice but to begin with foreclosure on your home. We have given you more than adequate notice on this issue, and we have no other choice. _ **

**_ Please act accordingly, _ **

**_ Wilson Lending Inc. _ **

Your brows furrowed deeper as you looked over the notice once more, this couldn’t be right, your father was never behind on his payments, and you would know, your mother was always on top of the finances in your house hold. Looking through more of the papers you stopped at what seemed to be an email,

**_ Mr. y/l/n, _ **

**_ I’ve been nothing but a patient man with you, and frankly I’m growing tired, you wouldn’t want me to send my men to pay you a visit to you and your l _ ** **_ ovely _ ** **_ wife, would you? Shame that your daughter is no longer in the picture, such a tragedy to lose a child. You have a week to get my money, that you’ve owed for seven years now, again, you either pay my money, or I'll find a way to collect, and I assure you Mr. Y/l/n, you won’t want me to have to come collect from you. _ **

Your breath was caught in your throat, fingers stark white from the grip you had on the paper.  _ Tragedy to lose a child, money, collect _ , you couldn’t fathom what you were reading. What in the world had your father done, what had he been doing under the roof of this house. You sorted through the next one, this one completely knocking the air from you, leaving you feeling more confused and worried than ever before,

**_ Mr. Y/l/n _ **

**_ It’s a tragedy for me to be writing this email, but had I done this in person I can assure you one of us wouldn’t be breathing when it was over. Do you take me for a fool, did you not think I wouldn’t catch on to what it was you were doing? Working with the enemy, such a shame, I know you know this is  _ ** **_ unforgivable _ ** **_ , you were witness to what happened to the other fellow who crossed me. It’s a shame though that you continued to do business with who you did, you’re the only one to blame for your fate. I would end this by saying see you soon, but we both know that won’t be _ ** **_ the case _ ** **_. My condolences to your daughter. _ **

The email after that was just eight words long, but it was enough to shake you to your very core.

**_ I’ll be seeing you very soon Mr. Y/l/n. _ **

You threw the papers down onto the desk, your body slumping into the seat, trying to figure out what the hell was going on here. None of these papers except for the  foreclosure statement contained any sort of information that could help you to understand what it was that your father was involved with. None of the emails which were your main source of concern contained any sort of information of the sender, and seeing as it was printed there was nothing for you to further dig into. Why was any of this laid out here in the first place, was this meant to be found, did your father want someone to see this information?

The longer you set there and looked at those papers the more you wanted to scream, to cry, you were feeling just as lost and scared, fearful of the uncertainty as you did seven years ago. You were frustrated because you couldn’t understand what was going on, you couldn’t even  begin to grasp the reality of your situation. You’ve lost your parents in a tragic accident, you’ve just found out your father worked for the mafia, or at least laundered for them it seems, and to add to all this it would seem that one of the men Detective Stark mentioned earlier wanted to collect from your father, but what was there to collect, your father was losing it all.

You could feel the underlying pins and needles of your nerves, what were you supposed to do, should you contact detective Stark, take him all this information and see what he can make of it? What if you did just that and he thought you had been lying all long, what if he accused you like he accused your father, what if he suspected you did have a hand in all this. You chewed on your lower lip in worry as you thought about the next worry, your mind going back to the emails, were any of those emails from Pierce,  Rumlow , or Barnes, and was one of those the men that was going to collect. Thinking back to the first email, you couldn’t place why your father would apparently fake your death, unless you had a  sibling you were unaware of. You were stumped and you were only growing more and more confused the longer you sat thinking on all this new information. You felt like your whole life was a lie, everything you grew up in and around was all fabricated to the lifestyle of your father.

You went to pick up the same papers but were jumping back into your seat when the office phone trilled on the desk. Your heart was beating wildly away in your chest, eyes wide as you looked at the noisy device. You stared at it unmoving, should you answer it, should you let it continue. You weren't given a chance to make the decision as the incessant ringing grew quiet an eerie silence filling the office once more. You stayed staring, once again jumping as it trilled again catching you off guard, it seemed to have gotten louder the second time. With shaky fingers you reached out picking the corded phone up and bringing it to your ear,

“h-hello?”

“Good morning, is Mr. Y/l/n in?” the voice on the other line questioned.

You swallowed the lump in your throat, “No, I'm sorry sir, but my parents have been in an accident and they,” god you couldn’t bring yourself to say it.

“oh, I’m so sorry miss, wait did you say parents, are you Mr. Y/l/n’s daughter?” he questioned

“uh yes, I'm his daughter, may I ask what the reason for the call is?”

“oh yes right, well, I'm calling from Wilson Lending INC, I was needing to speak with your father, but since that won’t be possible,” a pause on his end an irritated sigh sounding through the line, “actually you wouldn’t happen to be y/f/n y/l/n would you?” he questioned.

“Uh yes actually that is me,” you murmured.

“that’s actually great, do you think you could stop by our office, there’s something I will be needing to go over with you, seeing as you’re the next of kin.”

“uh”

“great,” he cut you off, “I can squeeze you in for 30 minutes from now, so I’ll be seeing you here,” he chirped.

You could barely get a word in before the dial tone was sounding through the receiver, the call having ended abruptly. A loud sigh left your lips as you placed the phone back on the stand, your body slouching into the seat, what more news could you possibly take today you thought with a groan.

Thanking the driver your slid out of the seat, coat wrapped tightly around your shoulders as you looked up at the lavish building before you, Wilson’s Lending INC stared back at you in grey bold letters. A shaky sigh left your lips as you felt a sense of dread roll through you, taking tentative steps you pushed yourself to the revolving doors.

The office was quiet, the only sounds in the room was the tapping and clacking  of a keyboard from the  receptionist, sat a few feet in front of you. Having heard the  door the woman looked up an almost bored expression on her unreadable features, “You can follow me this way, Mr. Wilson will see you now,” she mumbled. Your eyes darted around the room, but saw  no one else was in the building other than you, “please,” she spoke up again, “follow me right this way,”

Trailing behind her she led you int a small office space, “right in here, Mr. Wilson is expecting you,”

Mumbling a quiet thank you, you watched her walk back the way she had brought you before turning your attention back to the office in front of you. Drawing further into the office you were met with a cheery smile and an  ever chipper voice, “Good morning you must be Ms. Y/l/n, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” the man beamed as he stood from his desk to make his way over to you.

His firm was grip, his smile contagious, “Sam  wilson ,” he added, “owner of Wilson Lending INC,  its in the name,” he grinned, “please come in take a seat,” 

“since I don’t want to take up too much of your time, I'd like to go ahead and jump into it,” he spoke up after you had made yourself comfortable in your chair. You nodded your head allowing him to go on watching him sort through the papers on his desk, “Firstly I extended my sincerest apologies that we have to be meeting given the circumstances, my deepest condolences miss, such a tragic thing to occur,” he murmured.

You wanted to open your mouth to question that last bit that left his mouth but he was too quick, “Now in regards to your home, as I'm sure you knew it is now being foreclosed because of your father’s failure to pay, because of this before we go through with said foreclosure we are looking to hand over your home to the other co-owner, he has informed us he is willing to take it,”

Your brows scrunched in confusion, “co-owner?” you questioned, “what do you mean co-owner, are you speaking of my mother?”

Sam chuckled shaking his head, placing down the files he had down in front of him, “Your father had a co-owner but it wasn’t your mother,”

You slumped in your seat slightly, “why would he need a co-owner, shouldn’t it have been my mother?”

He let out a sigh, rubbing at his head, “Ms. Y/l/n, your father had a co-owner because alone he did not qualify to even begin the process to home owning, with more challenging lending standards when it comes to an  individual's credit score, debt to income ratio, it was easier to qualify with the individual your father asked to co-own with him.”

A frustrated groan left your lips, the web kept weaving around you, “so what does all this mean, why was I called in?”

“It’s difficult to walk away from a mortgage when you have more than one borrower,” he began, eyeing you to see if you understood,  “your father’s co-owner has kept up with his half but your father just recently was unable to make the payments, due to this the co-owner was called upon and has agreed to take over your home,” he paused eyeing you again, “the thing is if a co-owner dies their share goes to the other owners, in the co-owner ship a TIC agreement was signed where each co-owner can pass along their ownership through a will, meaning the remaining tenants might end up sharing the home with someone they never intended to.”

“this still doesn’t explain why I was called in,  I'm sorry Mr. Wilson but you’re just confusing me further,”

He rubbed at his temples, “what this means, is that on a will your father passed his ownership to you, so I can’t necessarily just give your father’s co-owner the home without your approval now,”

A hand rubbed over your face, “so then give him full ownership,” Sam raised a brow at you, “Look Mr. Wilson my parent’s and I had a fall out years ago, if I can be honest with you I barely even know anything about them it seems, so if that is the easiest way to settle this for my father then so be it, I don’t even reside here anymore, so I can assure you letting the house go to someone who is more suited for it will be the best thing in this case,”

He was eyeing you, studying you, it was beginning to make you slightly uncomfortable, “is there anything needed from me?” you asked hoping to finish this up soon.

“ yes, actually you and the co-owner will need to meet, he will need to buy you out, and you will need to be there to sign over given that you won’t have a change of heart,”

You raised your hand, “I can assure you there will be no change of heart,” you murmured, “how soon can we get this done, I don’t plan on being here longer than a week, I'm just here to sort out my parents things and I'll be on my way,”

“If it makes things  easier, we can come to you, that way you won’t be pulled from sorting through your  parent’s things, though I'm not sure there is much more to sort through,”

You raised a brow at his statement taken aback by the change of tone in his voice, “excuse me?” you questioned.

He smirked at you then, “no, not a thing Ms. Y/l/n, well that is all I have for you at the moment, Mr. Barnes and I will pay you a visit later this evening to go over the legalities of all this,” he grinned shooting you a wink.

You couldn’t help but be taken aback by the behavior as you stood on shaky legs pulling your coat and purse tighter around you. In your fraught state you almost hadn’t picked up on the name he uttered, almost.

“Mr. Barnes?” you questioned the name bouncing around in your mind as your remembered Detective Starks words.

He was grinning again, “Yes, Mr. Barnes, the co-owner of your home,”

Your face paled, heart dropping in your chest, “Are you okay?” Sam questioned his grin never faltering almost as if taunting you.

You nodded your head shakily before you were stumbling back slightly, a feeling of not being able to flee fast enough washing over you. You could hear his laughter sound through the building as you tucked tail and ran.

Hailing a  cab you ran back home, your heart thumping wildly in your chest, you couldn’t get off the cab fast enough, handing the cab driver your money thanking him quickly as you made your way up the driveway. You needed to leave, none of this felt right, none of it, and with the information Detective Stark had shared with you, and the emails you had come across, you knew you needed to get out and fast you should have never returned in the first place, you should have listened to your father. You had made your decision as you rushed up the steps of your home head down not wanting to be spotted by any of the neighbors or cars driving down the street.

Searching through your purse for the keys you gripped them tightly as you pushed them into the lock, a gasp left your lips as the door was pulled open taking your keys with it. A tall, bearded, honey blonde stood before you a glowering look on his sculpted features. A shiver ran down your spine, as you back up slowly, another gasp falling from your lips as you back hit a wall of muscle. You turned your head ever so slowly, eyes  drifting up to be met with a nefarious grin, deep piercing eyes, and a wicked mind.

“hello y/n.”


	4. The Wolf In Your Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates will be every Wednesday and Friday and Behind the Screen will be Tuesdays and Thursdays! this gives me enough time on Saturday, Sunday, and Monday to work on chapters and my online masters program! Thank you all for reading!

You go to flee but his hands are quicker , he grabs a hold of your biceps squeezing tightly keeping you from moving , a  pained groan slips past your lips.  Th e bearded golden blonde from before is surging forward, taking big steps as he closes the distance between the two of you. You cower in fear, your body pressing into the wall of muscle behind you, he stares down at you , a smirk pulling at his lips, “ well, well, well, look what the cat drug in,” he grins, “wait till boss gets a load of you.”

His eyes move away from your fearful face to the  cold  set of eyes behind yours, “bring her in , don’t want to keep the boss waiting.”

“W-wait no please,” you cried pushing against the solid block of muscle.

The fingers tightened on your skin causing a whimper to fall from your lips, “start moving, or I’ll move you myself,” the voice hissed in your ear, “and trust me, you don’t want me to have to move you .”

Another whimper falls from your lips as your painfully pushed forward. You follow the  man in front of you on shaky legs as  the broad man from behind pushes you through the threshold down to  the forbidden corridor .

He thrusts you through the open French doors of your fathers office.

“She’s here boss,” the golden blonde speaks up.

You watch with baited breath as your fathers chair turns, your breath catches in your throat.

Thick, lustrous, tousled, dark brown hair framed his chiseled face, strong and defined, his features molded from granite. His eyes a deep mesmerizing ocean blue accompanied with streaks of the lightest grey throughout. Dark brows were sloped in question, lips drawn in a hard line across his face, you cowered under his stare. Strong hands pointed to the seat in front of him, “sit” he commanded.

You swallowed unmoving, his features molded immediately to one of anger, “you’d be wise to listen,” he murmured darkly. Finger nails pressed harder into your skin, indented crescents sure to be left behind, “move it,” the man behind you grunted, shoving you forward. You gasped catching yourself on the chair, the man before you had requested of you to sit in. On shaky legs you rounded the chair, adjusting yourself onto it, your fingers stark white from the grip you had on the bottom of it.

The man before you ran a hand over his face, thumb brushing over his chin as he drank you in. He cleared his throat, his hand pointing to the man that still loomed behind you, “you can go,”

His eyes were still on your shaking form, “It’s truly unfortunate to have to have met under these circumstances,” he began leaning forward on his arms, “so sorry for your loss, such a tragic thing to have occurred,” he cooed.

You sat there eyes blown wide, body shivering in fear, “w-who are you?” 

A smirk pulled at the corner of the man’s lips, “m’ sorry where are my manners,” he grinned, “the names James Buchanan Barnes, though I’m sure daddy told you about me didn’t he?”

A knot formed in your throat, face paling, a low chuckled brewed from within him, “you look like you’ve seen a ghost, and I might as well be looking at one from what your father informed me of,” he paused raising a brow at you, “you are y/f/n y/l/n aren’t you?”

You nodded your head numbly, “well I'll be damned, looks like your father was a liar, thief, and traitor all in one, no wonder Pierce had him on such a tight leash,” 

The room began to spin your ears ringing; James caught on, his fingers snapping off to your side, strong hands gripped at your shoulders keeping you upright in the chair. Your head lolled side to side, as you tried to clear the disorientation away. You shook your head, “please, I- I don’t” you sucked in a breath of air, “I d-didn't please” 

“Get her to the couch, now,” he demanded to the man behind you.

Hands were finding there way from your shoulders to under your arms as they lifted you up. You held onto the hands for dear life as you stumbled your way to the lush leather couch, your head falling into the cooled material beneath you. A shaky sigh left your lips, the hidden secrets of your fathers luxurious life style was all coming to surface, and you were caught in the crossfire of it all seemed, and you had been unaware of it all. Taking in deep shaky breaths you attempted to calm your nerves, you knew they would do you know good in this unforeseen situation.

You felt the couch dip next to you, a glass of water held out to you, you looked from the glass to the man offering it to you, “it’s water,” he murmured, an impatient sigh left his lips when you made no move to grab it from his outstretched hand, “I take it you're not as easily swayed as your impressionable father was?”

You shook your head, “please, I had no idea what my father did in this home, I want nothing to do with any of it, you can have it all, I'll sign it over to you, just please,” you pleaded.

James barked out a laugh shaking his head, “you really expect me to believe that you had no part in your father’s plan, that man was a rat, no offense,” he muttered, “your father obviously couldn’t be trusted,” he slid closer than, your frame shrinking into the cushions as his stormy eyes bore into you, “so tell me, what makes you so different?”

You didn’t know if there was any convincing this man, obviously your father had betrayed him in unimaginable ways, but you knew you needed to try if you wanted to get out of this.

“I swear I didn’t know, my father never allowed me down these corridors when he was down here, it was forbidden to me, my father would never let me hear the end of it if I was caught down here, please,” you pleaded once more, “I swear I didn’t know what my father was doing behind these closed doors.”

James went to open his mouth but was cut off, when three raps sounded at the open office doors, his eyes moved from your’s to the doorway, “boss, he’s here,” grunted the man from earlier. A cheshire grin overtook his face, he rubbed his hands together as he looked at you once more, “shall we get started?”   


Your dragged from your father’s office, to your kitchen table where many nights you had spent sitting alone with your mother over one of her specialty meals.

“ouch, you’re hurting me!” you whined to the man that had man handled you from before, as he forcefully pushed you into the chair directly across from the two other men in the room. He hovered over you a snarl leaving his lips, you cowered in fear. 

“Enough!” a voice barked out, your head shot up in fear.

James who had been previously sitting next to Wilson the man from earlier, was now looming at the table fists clenched on the wooden surface, “have some damn respect,” he hissed at the man , “or do you need to have a talk with Steve again?” He growled.

The wicked mans face fell, a look of fear overtaking his features, “ n-no boss won’t be necessary,”

“Good,” he grunted “get out and send Steve in,”

The burly man practically bolted from his spot next to you, the golden blonde entering the room  picking a spot right at the doorway, a  menacing glare aimed at you.

Your head is snapping back at the sound of someone clearing their throat, Sam is looking over at you through the rim of his glasses, “shall we begin?” he questions.

“right,” he starts, “as I've already informed Ms. Y/l/n you are the co-owner of this house, and with the tragic passing of her parents, the father’s half has gone off to her in a will,” he informed Barnes, “Ms. Y/l/n has informed me that she would like to just sign over all rights to you, apparently she no longer resides in the area and does not wish to have any ties to this area.”

James turns to face Sam, his hand on his chin his brows furrowed deeply, “did you tell her about her father and what he owes me?”

Sam sighed running a hand over his head, his fingers working off his glasses as he stared back at the man annoyed, “no Buck it didn’t cross my mind, she was already shaken up coming into my office you really want me throwing that on her, she probably would have bolted the second I laid out that contract her father signed?”

You cleared your throat, “excuse me gentleman but I’m sitting right here,” you gritted out, “if it regards my father, it obviously regards me, so either of you mind telling me what it is my father signed”

Bucky turned to look at you his head cocked to the side as he eyed you, “I’m sorry,” he started, “for a second there it sounded like you were telling us what to do,” he shifted his body to fully face you now, “you don’t get to ask the questions y/n”

You could feel your fear be replaced by anger, you had had enough of people belittling you because of who your father was, and apparently how he lived his life, you’d be damned if you stayed in his shadow, enough was enough, you would not be quieted.

“Listen here Barnes,” you snarled, “I’m not sure what relation my father had with you but I can assure you I was unaware of it, I lived my life locked away in my room, aside from the times he would send me and my mother out of the house,” he opened his mouth but you cut him off, “and another thing, I've had just about enough of you men telling me what you think you know about me, when in reality you don’t know the half of it,” you gritted out, “my father may have lived his life a certain way but I can assure you I had no part in it, and I definitely had no say when my father kicked me from this very home at the ripe age of 18!” you hissed, “so yes you can believe what you want, but I will not allow you to further disrespect me, I have in a single night lost both my parents who I have not spoken with since I was 18 that was seven fucking years ago, and I get here only to find that my dad was involved with the mafia, he owes some asshole money which apparently he planned to collect, and oh get this you, you” you gritted pointing your fingers at him “you are the co-owner of this house again something I was unaware of.”

You were heaving with rage by the time you got all the words that had brewed inside of you, James seemed unbothered by your little explosive episode.

“you done doll?” he questioned bored.

“don’t call me d-”

His fist met the table startling you into silence, “i think you’ve said enough,” he hissed, “it’s my turn to speak, so you’re going to sit there and you’re going to listen got it?” he questioned brow raised.

“do you understand?” he questioned again when you didn’t give him a response the first time.

You nodded your head, “you see y/n you brought up a great point in your petty little rant, and that was that your father owed money to some asshole,” he was grinning devishly then, “and do you know who that asshole he owed money to was?” he questioned through gritted teeth, you didn’t answer but inside you were filled with dread because you knew the words that would come out of his mouth would not be good, “awe why so quiet now sweetheart, you had a lot to say just now, what happened, cat got your tongue?” he scoffed, “that asshole y/n was me, and your father still to this day had yet to pay me my money that he stole because if it had been borrowed I would have seen it,” he stood from his chair, “see about seven years ago, I paid your little daddy a visit, and I told him he either pay me my money or that contract he signed after signing the one to this house, would be valid, and I would take the one thing he promised to hand over if he couldn’t comply, did daddy dearest ever tell you what it was he wagered or are we going to keep playing this victim card you y/l/n’s seem to be real good at”

You were scared again, you shook your head not trusting your voice, “see daddy owed not only money to me, but that old man also owed, Pierce and Rumlow,” your skin was vibrating in fear, the names of all the men detective Stark had mentioned were coming up. The thing is those two fools didn’t think of a way to collect seeing as he worked for them, so regardless they would get their money one way or another, thing is your father decided to play with fire when he asked for my help, and well I needed to make sure I was going to get my money back so I had my good friend Wilson here,” he said patting Sam on the back, “i had him work up a contract with your father, and in that contract it was stated that If he could not get me money after sometime, that he would have to give up whatever he had promised on that contract, and man would you believe what that old man put,”

Your hands were shaking in your lap, he leaned forward then, eyes menacing, “that old bastard promised me,” he gestured towards himself, “he promised me that if when the time came to collect and he didn’t have the money, that you,” his finger turned to you, “ you would be handed to me.”

Your face paled, you father wouldn’t do such a thing, he was a mean man, but there was just no way he could be this vile.

“t-that c-can't be,” you replied shakily, “my father would never”

“oh no?” he questioned, “then I guess you didn’t know daddy to well,” he muttered sliding a file towards you.

Your shaky hands reached for the file, you opened it looking over the contents, a shaky sob left your lips. Your father had actually done it, he had actually signed you off to this man if he wasn’t able to pay him his money. You shoved the file away from you looking up at the two men with watery eyes, “please, you don’t have to do this, I'll,” you chocked back a sob, “I'll find a way to fix his mess, just please,”

“now wait just a damn minute,” Bucky cut you off, “you father may have promised you to me, but I'm not sleazy like your old man,”

You wanted to sigh in relief but you knew there was something he was holding back from you something he wasn’t telling you, and from how your day had been going you were sure it wouldn’t be any good either.

“now I'm going to need you to just sit a second longer, and my good friend Sam is going to explain something to you, and trust me when I say it is in your best interest to take into account everything he is about to explain to you,”

Looking to Sam you waited, the dread coursing through you, “Now Ms. Y/l/n when Mr. Barnes initially found out what you father had signed over if he was to have to come collect, I can assure you he was angered at the audacity your father had to sign your name on that line,” he eyed you, “Mr. Barnes still has a means to collect, but he’s chosen to go about it a different way, it’s in regards to this house,” he added.

“he can have  it; he can take whatever he  wants pl-” Bucky sent you a look efficiently cutting you off.

“as I was saying, Mr. Barnes met with me months prior to all this with the beliefs that you were no longer in the picture and his original intention was to just collect the house when your father had given him word that you had passed tragically one day,” he paused, “upon hearing of your return recently and that it was actually you in the flesh, Mr. Barnes decided he wanted to change the means of your fathers contract,” he sighed rubbing at his temples slightly, “Mr. Barnes has asked me to inform you that he will settle your father’s debt IF and only IF you agree to take owner ship of the home with him-”

“I can do that,” you cut him off.

Sam sighed, “please let me finish,” he muttered, “you would be taking your father’s ownership, but you must also come home, and you must stay here in this home,”

You were taken aback, “excuse me?” you questioned, you were getting upset again, “you can’t possibly do that, you can’t make me agree to any of this this is-”

“Now Ms. Y/l/n it would be in your best interest to agree to this, there is no other way,”

You scoffed looking over at Bucky, “how is there no other way, you can’t just force me to come home, and make me stay here,”

“Steve, Sam, would you give me and y/n a couple of seconds” Sam stood wordlessly following Steve out of the kitchen. Bucky rounded the table, “Look y/n, you can either do it this way, or I will collect the way I originally intended and I can promise you doll, you don’t want me to do that, I'm offering you a home, safety from the goons your father worked for, and a worry free life, this would all be yours at no cost to you, so long as you do as I say, and all you’d have to do is sign,”

“y-you can’t ask that of me, I don’t have to agree to any of this, I'll go to Detective Stark”

Bucky threw his head back in a howl of laughter, “sweetheart, I'm not asking anymore,” he replied the smile vanishing from his features, “ I've been done asking, now” he spoke again his voice much lower, leaning in closer “ I'm going to have my men come back in and we’re going to get this contract signed, I'm honestly doing you a favor here, you have nobody left, mommy, daddy, all your family is gone y/n, there’s no one for you to go back to, no one for you to run too, so it would be in your best interest to be the good little girl we all know you to be and sign that name of yours right next to mine on that contract,”

You swallowed, you were terrified of the  repercussions that might come if you didn’t agree, and he was right, you had nobody left, so this couldn’t possibly be any worse. A shaky sigh left your lips, “fine, I'll sign,” you  murmured lowly.

Bucky was grinning wolfishly, “that’s my girl,” 

You moved away from him glaring, “ I'm not  your girl” you hissed.

“the contract say’s otherwise,”

You cocked your head at his words, but weren’t able to question him as he beckoned for his men.

Sam, Steve trailed in, Detective Stark following in behind them, Bucky grinned at your confused expression, “w-what is he doing here?” you whispered.

“ oh Detective Stark?” he questioned a smirk pulling at his lips, “he’s here as a witness,”


	5. Welcome Home

“a witness?” you questioned shakily, “what do you mean witness, he – he,” a shaky finger is pointed at Detective Stark, as your mind tries to piece together what Bucky had just told you.

“He what,” Bucky questioned a bored expression on his face, “paid you a visit, brought my name up, told you to call him if anything ever came up, am I missing anything?”

Your eyes widened in horror, who was this man, how could have he known that, had he been watching you keeping tabs on you this entire time as you mulled over your thoughts Bucky turned away from you and to the man of question, “Tony I thought I told you before to stop associating me with those rats, have you learned nothing from the first time, do I need to pay the precinct another visit”

Detective Stark or rather Tony threw his hands up in the air, “ oh go ahead and visit the precinct,” he scoffed, “you’ll just be sent to me, so watch yourself before I actually start an investigation on you, and what did you want me do Barnes, the girl literally knew nothing about what her bastard father did, I wasn't going to frighten or hurt the girl further she’s already been through a lot she just lost her parents!” he argued.

Tensions grew in the room as the men argued loudly, voices rising by the second, “stop, please stop,” you spoke hands clutching your head, “enough!” you screeched.

The men grew quiet, the room falling silent, eyes watched you taking in your disheveled form, your chest rising and falling in breathless heaves, “what in the world is going on here?” you cried through watery eyes, “do you seriously work for this man?” your accusatory voice questioned Wilson and Stark, “Is all of this some kind of sick joke my father put you up to, because with the way this hellish day has been going, I wouldn’t doubt it,” you grunted, Detective Stark opened his mouth to speak, “I said enough,” you hissed, “I have had no time, no time to mourn the loss of my parents since I received that phone call, parents who I have not seen in the last seven years, and you,” you hissed waving at the men in front of you, “you all stand and talk about my life as if I'm not here, what the actual fuck is wrong with the lot of you, do you all have no heart, did you all never lose family,” you questioned voice rising by the second. 

Your nerves were frayed breathing sporadic, as the blood pounded away heavily in your ears, your heart thudding away wildly in your chest, hands shaking at your sides where you stood unmoving. The room began to warp around you, your vision blurring, a choked gasp fell from your lips, you needed to get away you thought, you needed to get out of this damned house, needed to get away from all of it. Turning on your heel as quick as you could you bolted down the hall, the front door in your view, the hall quickly became disfigured as the walls warped, the floor stretching.

A choked sob fell from your lips, even now it was almost impossible to get away even when your escape was feet away. Dropping to the floor, your hands take hold of your head as you wept. Strong hands took a hold of you, fingers curling around your shoulder, and in your flurry, you tried to get away, “y/n, calm down, I need you to calm down,” the voice instructed softly.

Your head shook wildly as more tears cascaded down your face, “I-I c-c-can't” you gasped trying to catch your breath.

Large calloused hands took ahold of your face, “yes you can,” the voice instructed, “look at me, y/n, I need you to look at me, let me help you,”

Your eyes slipped open to find Steve looking at you with worried eyes, the menacing glance there no more, “please,” you pleaded through your tears, “I don’t want to be here anymore, I want to go home, just please let me go home, I promise I won’t say anything, I'll find a way to pay you what my dad owed you, just please,” you knew you pleas would fall on deaf ears, he wasn’t the one your father had signed you away too.

Steve sighed, “what I need you to do Is breathe for me, do you think you can do that?” he questioned dismissing your pleas.

Your head fell in defeat as you nodded your head numbly, Steve gave you a warm smile, before he began to take deepened breaths his chest rising and falling rhythmically, you followed his motions, “that’s great sweetheart, give me a few more,” you continued to breath with the burly man.

“Look y/n,” he spoke softly once you had calmed, “I know all of this is news to you, and I believe you when you say you had no idea what you father did in this home, I also understand that you are in an unbelievable amount of pain having just lost your parents but I can promise you that Bucky means you no harm, you have to believe me even though I know it's hard given who he is that he had no intention of collecting, but your father left him with no choice, please,” he pleads, “please sign that contract you’ll be safer this way.” 

“why,” you questioned eyes growing watery again, “why can’t you just let me go?”

Another impatient sigh is leaving his lips, his eyes glancing over your shoulder to the kitchen where the others wait, “listen to me, and you listen good, it’s either Bucky collects and you let him keep you safe, or your fathers goons are going to collect and unless you want to end up like you parents, you need to sign that contract,” fear rolled through you at his words.

Steve’s eyes drew up at the sound of footsteps approaching you from behind, “Steve, you mind giving us a few minutes” you heard Bucky’s voice call out.

“Sure thing boss,” he murmured giving your shoulder a squeeze before his form was disappearing, Bucky taking his spot. 

His fingers are hooking under your chin, bringing your eyes to his, “you feelin better” he questioned eyes searching your face. You couldn’t help but to cower under his stare, a motion he picked up on, “look y/n,” he sighed, “I need you to listen to me, and I need you to understand something, I'm not sure who you think you’re dealing with but I can guarantee you I am not the one you want to make an enemy of, if you continue to run your mouth off like that to me it won’t do you any good in the long run, I warned your father that night that I would collect, now you can either let me collect this way, or I can collect the way I originally intended and I promise you don’t want that,” a pause, “so what do you say sweetheart?”

The pen shook in your hand, three pairs of eyes were on you waiting, had been for a while but you just couldn’t bring yourself to bring the pen to paper. Bucky sighed next to you hand rubbing at his chin in frustration, he leaned in mouth just by your ear, “you’ll come to learn that I can be a very patient and persistent man, but you take the cake doll, all you need to do is sign the damn thing, I'm not sure what’s keeping you from signing but if it helps any I’m not the enemy, if there ever was one I can guarantee it was your father,”

Your head turned slowly to face him eyes turned to slits, face inches from his, you opened your mouth to give him a piece of your mind, but he was quick in silencing your thoughts, “I’m doing you a damn favor y/n,” he hissed, “think about it peach, what the hell do you have to go back to other than that one bedroom dingy apartment that's practically falling apart?” how did he know that, “you’re a smart girl y/n, you know what you’re doing, but I also know you know just what type of man I can be if you keep crossing me,” a sigh of frustration left his lips, “there is nothing left for you back “home”, you’ll be safer here, you’ll be taken care of and the sooner you can understand that the quicker the two of us can get further acquainted and hell maybe even become the best of friends, doesn’t that sound nice?”

You knew your feeble attempts at getting them to let you go and attempt to settle your father’s debt your way would get you nowhere. There was no point in fighting this man, he was set on collecting your father's debt, this was your fate, the one your father has signed you away too.

With shaky hands you brought your hand down, your fingers scrawling out your name on the black line. You swallowed the knot in your throat sliding the document to the side, Bucky plucked the pen from your hand, his decision coming much quicker than yours as he signed his name.

You watched as Bucky slid the document down the table to Sam, who passed it to Detective Stark who also signed his name on the dotted line. Dread filled you as what seemed to be a stamp of approval came down onto the paper. 

“Well it’s settled, boss,” Wilson stated as he gathered his papers together, placing them away neatly into his briefcase.

Bucky stood clapping his hands together, “that’s great,” he grinned, “I'll drop by your place later to pick up a copy if you don’t mind,”

Sam shook his head, “no problem at all man, I'll have it ready for you, well if there’s nothing else and you don’t mind I think I'll be heading out need to go close up the office before heading home,”

Bucky raised his hands, “by all means go ahead, if I need anything more I'll be in contact with you, Steve,” he says calling out to his right-hand man, “shall we see Sam out?”

Steve’s nodding his head, “sure thing boss,” 

The three men exit the room barely sparing your frozen form a second glance, “hey kid, you okay?”

A scoff slipped past your lips, you looked up with watery eyes, “do I look okay, detective Stark?” you hummed, “is that even your real title, are you actually a man of the law, because I'm not sure an actual man of the law would ever be a witness to something such as this”

A frown overtook his features, “it's obvious you don’t trust me right now kid, but I can promise you I'm not a bad guy, I-”

“trust you?” you questioned exasperatedly, “I don’t trust anyone right now,” you muttered, “it seems I've been lied to my whole life, and now this, what the hell is all this, what did I just sign away too?”

Though the question wasn’t for him Detective Stark felt he had some fault in your current predicament, or at least the distraught state you were in. He took a seat in front of you, “Ms. Y/l/n with all due respect, I'm sorry all this is happening to you,” you scoffed rolling your eyes at his starting statement, “Mr. Barnes may be known for being a notorious mobster, but he only does things if it's in good intentions.”

You’re snapping then, “good intentions?” you questioned, “Mr. Stark in what way is holding someone in a place against their will because their father signed them away as a means to collect a good intention, in what way does that sound right, because honestly I would like to know,”

Detective Stark removed his glasses rubbing at his eyes, “Ms. Y/l/n, I’m aware you didn’t know who or what your father was working for but I can guarantee you the men your father worked under are much worse than Mr. Barnes, he truly is doing you a favor, he’s keeping you safe, he’s offering you protection,”

“why is it that me signing my freedom away is a favor he’s doing for me, what are my father’s men capable of?”

“it’s not my place to say, but I'm sure if you ask Barnes, he may be able to give you some insight,”

An annoyed groan left your lips, “you’re a detective Mr. Stark shouldn't you be able to provide me this information,”

He went to reply but was cut off by someone clearing their throat, you turned your head to see Bucky standing in the doorway brow raised, “detective stark you’re free to go back to the office, I'd like to speak with y/n in private,”

Tony nodded, “give him a chance,” he whispered low, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder before departing from the room.

Your eyes followed Bucky’s movements, watching his form as he rounded you to take Tony’s previous spot, “are you here tell me to listen and listen good?” you questioned.

A laugh fell from his lips, “you’re a snarky little thing aren’t you; you really are nothing like your father,” he observed leaning back in the chair.

“is that supposed to make me feel better about this entire situation, because I'm sorry to break it to you Mr. Barnes but it isn’t.”

His hands is sweeping across his face, “look y/n I don’t expect you to like me, hell I don’t even expect you to want to be friends much less acquaintance's, but I need you to trust me here,”

“trust you?” you cut him off, “how do you expect me to do that when you literally made me a sign a contract that is keeping me here, keeping me tied to you, a person I know nothing of”

“I'm doing this for your safety,” he murmured.

“what exactly are you keeping me safe from?” you questioned hoping to get some more answers out of him.

“I'm keeping you safe from your father’s bad life decisions,”

A frustrated groan left your lips, “just when I think I'm getting somewhere with all of this run around you throw me a statement like that, what is that even supposed to mean,”

“I just need you to trust me,”

“Trust you” You laughed, “ I don’t even know you, how can you expect me to trust you?”

“And I’ll tell you everything you need to know once you get settled in, for now I just need you to work with me, I need you to be patient, and most importantly I need you to stay put.”

You threw your hands in the air, “there you go again, with the cryptic bullshit” you muttered glaring at him.

Bucky leaned forward his hand grasping your chin, “that mouth of yours is going to get you in trouble one day, watch it,” he grunted.

You shook your head stiffly, “so what now?” you questioned voice warbled from the hold he had on your face.

“for the rest of the day you get settled in, I'll have my men get a service set up for you parents and we’ll also look over your parents will once this is all over, you will not step out of this house unattended unless Steve or I am with you, once I'm available we can go for your things at your old place.”

“so you’re not going to be staying here?” you questioned.

Bucky grinned his smile causing a stir within you, “not like that Barnes,” you hissed squinting your eyes, “I just thought that-” you paused mulling over your words, and how to speak them.

“thought what?” he questioned, “oh no doll, I have my own place, this, this is yours, it belongs to you now,”

Your head cocked to the side in confusion, “w-what, but I thought,”

Bucky smiled warmly, not a trace of the stong minded man before, “you were right about one thing y/n,” he murmured, “you don’t know me, I told you I'm not the enemy, your father and the men he worked for, now those I can’t speak for, they’ve done terrible things in my city, and I've been trying to make it right since,”

You were stumped he was telling you a side you didn’t know, hell you had no idea who James Buchanan Barnes really was, he could just be spewing you words to make sure you didn’t run, what if he was the enemy and he was playing you like a wolf in sheep's clothing.

“I see what you’re doing y/n, and you need to stop,” 

You looked at him with wide eyes, “what, what was I doing?”

He shook his head rubbing at his chin, a look of exhaustion passing over his features, “you still don’t trust me, and that much is to be expected, but I just need you to push aside all this mess and I need you to trust me, because there is things out there that your father did that are bigger than you and me, and I'm just trying to keep my city and the people in my city safe from the scum of the earth,”

If he was weaving you into his web of lies you weren't sure what to make of all this new information, you knew nothing of your father’s life even though you lived under the very same roof and now all this new information that was being thrown at you, well it was safe to say you were over it.

Bucky could very much well read the distress on your face, “I think I should get going, you look like you need some time to yourself,” he spoke lowly as he stood from the chair. 

Pushing yourself from the chair, you stood trailing behind him as you followed him to the door.

He showed himself out of the house, Steve waiting next to a black van in the driveway, he turned to you, “did you know I was coming home before I actually got here?” you questioned before he could speak.

He grinned, “like I said y/n this city is mine, hell even the town if you must, I have eyes and ears everywhere sweetheart, I told you, there’s no running once I know about you, I'll always find you,”

Your mouth parted as you took in his words, he tipped his head to you then, “goodnight, y/l/n, we’ll be in touch.


	6. The Uninvited

You watched from the window by the door as Bucky drove away, standing by until you could no longer see the red lights from the back of the sedan that carried him. Letting the curtain fall closed you leaned against it eyes falling shut as you took in a shaky breath. You opened your eyes looking at what they could see of your old residence, or should you say new.

Your body thrummed with the need to run, but you knew there would be consequences if you did, hell look at where you were now because you hadn’t listened to your father’s warnings of never returning home. Pushing yourself away from the window, you made sure the door was locked and bolted before making your way back to your father’s office.

There was things you didn’t understand, things you needed to know, and the only place you felt you could find some source of answers was inside the depths of this very office. Letting your feet carry you, you rounded the wooden desk plopping yourself once more into the leather chair. You looked at the desk dazed not even knowing where to begin, where could you even begin to look to get some information when your father was as secretive as he was, would you even find any answers to the questions that loomed in your mind?

Not wanting to spend more time in here than necessary you began to dig through what you could see, which was the files that had been laid out here earlier, just now in a neater pile, you had assumed that would be Bucky’s doing which now that you thought about it you would have to question how he got himself into this house while you had been meeting with Wilson. Skipping over the mail, and the emails you had read earlier you pushed those off to the side, going through the other files that had yet to be touched.

Opening one of the files, you came across pictures, your brows furrowed in confusion, they were pictures of you father and mother, and from the looks on their faces they were in distress. It was all pictures of them in this very house, and in each one they were always looking over their shoulder as if waiting an impending doom. Your mother’s face in each image was distraught, her eyes were sunken in, her form slumped in on itself, your breath caught in your throat, tears coming to your eyes, as your fingers ran over the glossy image of her. What happened to your once bright, and full of life mother? Your father was now half of the man you had seen him when you were in this house, and now, much like your mother he was cowering in fear, always peaking around doors, eyes searching out the window, head in his hands slouched over the desk that you now sat. 

Had it been Bucky who took these photos of your parents, had he been watching them till he was able to strike and take them out? You continued to look at the photos only stopping when a white index card fell from between the photos, it flopped down onto the desk. You placed the photos down to the side reaching for the card,

You can’t run from fate, and you sure as hell can’t run from me, you try to run, and we’ll go after the one thing you love the most. 

One thing you love the most you thought, but your father didn’t love anything, unless they were referring to his wealth well, but from what you had discovered it was never you father’s wealth to begin with it had all been borrowed or given to him. Going back to the photos you looked through them again hoping to see if maybe the thing your father loved the most was somehow photographed. You flipped through more but were finding nothing except more pictures of your frightened parents, that is until you reached the last photo in the stack.

Your breath caught in your throat, your fingers shaking violently, the image had been circled harshly in red marker “the thing you love most” scrawled at the top. It, it couldn’t be, how did this person know where to find you, you had no contact with your mother and father the day you had left this house, no one could have possibly known where to find you, so why were you staring at an image of yourself in your apartment.

You felt yourself grow dizzy again as you braced your arms against the desk burying your head in them as you took in deep breaths. This had to have been Bucky’s doing, he was the only one that knew about you, this couldn’t possibly have been any of the men your father worked for. They had never seen you, nor you them, there was just no way.

Tucking the photos back into the file you pushed it off to the side planning on confronting Bucky about them the next time you saw him, if this was his doing you would know. You moved onto the next file; this one was full of receipts, the dates varying from years ago, to a couple of months ago where they seem to stop abruptly.

Most of them were signed not only by your father, but by an Alexander Pierce, a HYDRA logo planted on the bottom of each receipt.

You rubbed a hand over your head as you continued to skim through them, from what you could make of these transactions it was money your father and this Alexander Pierce gentleman were making, whoever the other person was, was just handing over handfuls of cash. Groaning you closed that file piling it on top of the other, at this point you felt you only had more unanswered questions and a part of you dreaded that the only person to provide them would be Bucky Barnes.

Picking up the last file, it was lighter than the rest, you opened it to find a single printed letter, a yellow sticky note pasted to the top of it with the single word “copy” on it. Peeling off the note your eyes skimmed over the letter.

_I know I have no right to ask of any more favors, but I don’t know where to turn. I have lied and cheated you a great many times so I don’t believe I am worthy of receiving any more of your help, but as a father I have nowhere else to turn. The time has run out for me, and unfortunately my wife, I ask that you please take into account what I am asking, and that you think over it, please. My daughter never passed away like I made you to believe, I just couldn’t have you taking her from me, she was my wife’s and I’s prized possession, my wife would have had my neck if she knew what I had done. I thought I could keep my two lives separated, that the two worlds I lived in would never meet, how foolish I had been, I didn’t think signing my daughter over as leverage would be a big deal, I thought I could pay back every cent that I had borrowed, but they caught on, and I was cut off. So I had to fake her death to keep her safe, to keep her out of this damn life I knew very well I could not protect her from. I sent her away, I made her leave this house with a promise to never return. The thing is Pierce’s men have found her, and their means to collect will make sure that lie I told you comes true. I need you to find her before they do, I need you to keep her safe by any means, you wanted to collect then please collect now, do what you must, but please keep her safe she will have no one left, she will have no one to keep her safe, to protect her and I would never be able to forgive myself if something happened to her. I may have been a horrible father to her, her entire life that she lived under this house, but I couldn’t have her getting close, I couldn’t have them finding out about her and using her as leverage against me. Please Mr. Barnes, please all I ask is that you think about it, I have nowhere else to turn and my time is up, I won’t be able to keep her safe from the horrors that dwell on the streets but I have faith that you can._

_Mr. Y/l/n_

The letter fell from your hands, big wet tears sliding down your face as a sob tore through you. If this letter was anything to go based off of and if Bucky had actually received it, then he really wasn’t the enemy, but how were you to know for sure, what if he had planted this here while you were out and knew you would be curious enough to go looking for answers. The more you sat and dwelled the more the panic, worry, and fear consumed your soul. You just wanted this to all be some dream, some twisted messed up dream, that when you woke up from it you would be back in your ratty torn up apartment.

No matter how hard you had shut your eyes, how hard you had pinched your sides, or opened and closed them, this wasn’t a dream. You had spent all night and well into the morning tossing and turning, the reminder of what today would bring looming in the forefront of your mind. During your sleepless night Bucky had sent you a text,

**“Wilson and stark have set up a burial service for your parents, sorry this can’t be done properly, but it needs to be done quietly and fast, it’ll be held at Holy Cross Cemetery @ 9 sharp.”**

You had wanted to ask him more, call him out about the letter that you had discovered, but all you could bring yourself to type out was,

**“How did you get my number?”**

The text had gone unanswered much like all the questions in your life had, it seemed this would be no exception. 

You had watched the sun peek through the curtains of you parent’s room, the light casting over you from where you lay on their bed. Glancing over at the digital clock that sat on your parent’s night stand you saw that you had an hour from the time you were due to be at your parent’s service. Deciding to leave a little early to make sure you got there in time you removed yourself from the safety of the bed moving around the room to grab some clothes from the suitcase you had packed. You also requested took the time to request an Uber to take you to your destination.moving around the room to grab some clothes from the suitcase you had packed. You also requested took the time to request an Uber to take you to your destination.

It was rounding 8:50 when you finally arrived to the destination. Had it not been for the green canopy you probably wouldn’t have known where to send your driver. Pulling up you were greeted by a middle-aged woman, a cheerful smile on her face despite the circumstances of why you were there. 

She glided over to you her hand outstretched, “so great to meet you Ms. Y/l/n, my deepest condolences for your loss, I can’t imagine the pain you must be in”

You gave her a tight-lipped smile, “anyway Mr. Barnes was kind enough to put this together for you, as a way to honor your parents if you will,”

You nodded your head, “Well,” she coughed, “Mr. Barnes informed me it would be a very intimate burial, was it only meant to be you?” she questioned.

“I suppose so, my parents didn’t have any other family and I’m there only daughter,” you replied stoically.

She cleared her throat, “right,” she murmured dragging out the word, “well I’ll leave you to it, if you need anything you can make your way to our office and we can get it for you, Mr. Barnes has made us promise to take care of you during this time,”

“Take care of me?” you questioned.

“He has paid us very heftily to make sure you’re taken care of while here and that no one bothers you,” she smiled.

Of course, money was involved, these would be his eyes.

“Well thank you very much,” you paused not having gotten her name, “its Catherine miss,” she replied.

“right, well thank you Catherine but I don’t think that will be necessary, I would like though to be alone for a few minutes before we continue,”

Catherine nodded her head in understanding, “absolutely Ms, whenever you’re ready you can just flag down my men and we will get everything moving for you,”

You thanked her once more before you watched her retreating form, taking in a shaky breath you moved forward.

One single casket laid closed in front of you, the brightest arrangement of flowers resting over it. Your heart clenched in your chest, tears brimming in your eyes, you looked up to the sky, you wanted to scream, wanted to ask why this had to happen to you, why this had to be the life, the nightmare you were currently living.

“such a tragic thing,” a voice spoke from behind you startling you.

You turned around slowly, the voice sending shivers down your spine, two men stood there, on older gentleman, and one a few years younger than the first, “excuse me?” you questioned shakily.

“I said,” he spoke stepping towards you, “that there passing was quite tragic, I can’t imagine the pain they must have been in, but at least they went out together,” 

“I’m sorry but who are you?” you questioned the anger boiling inside of you at how he was speaking about your parents.

The man smiled smugly, a wickedness to him, “Oh, where are my manners, I’m a friend of your fathers, Alexander Pierce, such a pleasure to finally be meeting you Y/n, you were your dads most prized possession you know, and now I can see why” he held out a hand for you, but you were frozen in fear, you should have ran, your father and Bucky be damned.

You looked between the men your thoughts racing, “oh where are my manners” he spoke up withdrawing his hand, “this is Brock Rumlow, one of my best men,” he added gesturing to the man standing tall next to him, “your father and mother were the last to see him, so glad he could see them before they left us,” 

“I’m sorry Mr. Pierce but this is a private viewing and in no means should you or Mr. Rumlow be here I also don’t appreciate the way you’re talking about my parents if you wouldn’t mind leaving now that would be great,”

Pierce barked out a laugh, head thrown back heartily before he was steeling himself, eyes darkening over as he glared at you, “it’s quite sweet y/n that you think you can make such a statement towards me,” he hissed, you took a step back at his words, “now listen here you little bitch, your father was a rat, and from the looks of it your exactly like your pathetic, no good father, you should have stayed away y/n, but like your father you seem to have taken to the likes of that rodent Barnes, shame, the death your father faked for you might not have been a lie after all.”

You were shivering now, and not from the cool wind picking up around you, “I’d watch yourself dear, your parents death was no accident, they had it coming, your father knew what would happen if he crossed me, and that’s exactly what he did, poor rat didn’t think it would actually happen so I can only imagine the surprise on his face when he thought he and your mom were actually going to get out with their lives,” he chuckled heartily, “such a pathetic man your father,”

Your eyes were brimming with tears, “how dare you, don’t you dare speak of my parents like that, you have no idea what you’re saying, get out of here!” you hissed the anger peeking over the edge.

Pierces face hardened as he took strides towards you his hand gripping your chin harshly, “Barnes might be sweet on you, but not me y/n so watch how you speak to me, I’m not done collecting from you father, and If you wouldn’t want me collecting sooner than later i’d watch it,” he hissed pushing your face roughly sending you stumbling.

Fear had all but consumed you as you caught yourself fleeing from the canopy and into the drizzling rain. You pushed your heel clad feet as fast as they could go needing to get away. The office that Catherine entered far off in the distance but nonetheless in your line of sight, you turned to look back to see no sign of pierce or Rumlow but instead there was a black sedan racing towards you. A sob left your lips as the fear overtook you again, you pushed your feet with all your might hoping to make it the office before the sedan could get to you.

A scream was leaving your lips as it swerved in front of you, you bolted off to the side away from the safety of the office. Your lungs were burning as you pushed your legs, when all too quickly your feet were being taken from under you, your body being lifted from the safety of the ground. A scream tore from your lips, “put her the fuck down Steve!” you heard a voice yell from the distance.

You couldn’t help the sob that tore through you, relief almost flooding you that it wasn’t Pierce. Steve had just placed you back onto the grass when you were bolting past him and straight at Bucky, the other man by his side just about ready to take you down had it not been for Bucky telling him to “stand the fuck down”

You crashed into him, your arms wrapping themselves around his form, “what the hell happened,” he grunted.

A sob fell from your lips, not able to speak the name that now chilled you to the core.


	7. Alone & Foresaken

Bucky had pulled you along on shaky legs back to the  warmth of the black sedan he had just been in. He left you under the watchful eyes of Steve as he  marched his way to the  office that you had been previously running to for safety. As hardened of a man  as  Steve tried to be around you his façade was failing as concern overtook his features watching you tremble in fear . His hands reached out rubbing up and down your arms as he tried to warm you up , “you’re shaking like a leaf, can you tell me what happened?” he questioned softly.

Silent tears were streaming down your face as the scenes from earlier replayed in your mind. Another choked sob was falling from your lips Pierce’s words ringing in your head. Your watery eyes snapped up to Steve’s “h-h-he s-s-said,” your hand came up to your mouth to muffle the sob that tore through you. Steve dropped his head slightly to get you to meet his eyes again, “he said what y/n, who’s he?”

You shook your head not wanting to speak the name, “y/n you need to tell me, if you  don’t, I won’t know how or who to keep you safe from,”

Your heart thundered away in your chest, you knew you needed to tell him if he indeed could keep you safe, but you still  weren't sure you trusted Bucky or his men especially with what you recently discovered in your fathers office, you needed answers, and the only person to possibly give them to you would be Bucky.

“I just want to go home, please can you take me home,” you sniffled.

Steve sighed rubbing his hands on your arms one final time, “sure thing, let me just go get the boss, you think you can wait here for me?”

You nodded your head stiffly your eyes searching your surrounding frantically, “ I'll be right back sweetheart, you stay here, I'm just going to go get Buck, and we’ll take you home, you’re going to be okay,” he murmured making sure you were tucked into the seat before shutting the door. You watched Steve jog away from you, his form becoming smaller the farther he got.

You were breathing shakily as you looked around, your first mistake, in the distance of the mirror you could see a figure stalking towards the sedan, the long black trench coat similar to the one you had seen on Rumlow.

_ “No, no, no”  _ you whispered under your breath, your eyes brimming with tears. This couldn’t be, your mind was just playing tricks on you. The more you stared with wide eyes, the closer he got, your fingers were shaking in your lap, you knew you should have just locked the doors and waited for Steve and Bucky to return but  Rumlow was stalking closer the more you waited, and you weren’t ready to find out what this sinister man was capable of.

Not giving It a second thought you threw the sedan door open, flying out of it, time stood still as you and  Rumlow both froze, his eyes grew impossibly darker, he was calculating your next move. The first step he took towards you had you bolting in the direction Steve and Bucky had gone in. Tears were streaming down your face as you pushed your legs with all  your might. You could hear  Rumlow’s heavy steps pounding away at the floor behind you.

Your safe haven was finally drawing closer the farther you  pushed, the building feet away from you. A scream tore through your lips as your body met the wet ground, a heavy mass falling  ontop of your back. Your body thrashed as you tried your best to get away, the screams falling from your lips were muffled by his hand covering your mouth. 

Rumlow chuckled darkly into your ear, “should have stayed away babe, I would have come to get you eventually, but you’ve just made this so much easier,”

The fear that tore through you had you biting down onto  Rumlows hand your fight or flight kicking in and right now you were going to fight to make it to safety. You were able to crawl a few feet up before he was  on you again his hand pushing your face into the earth below you.

fiesty one,” he hissed  getting a right grip on your hair as he lifted your face up to meet his, “gonna put up a bigger fight then your parents did that’s for sure, but don’t worry I like the fight ,”

. He was growling your hold only tightening as he reached for your hands. All he could do was push your head down but you were reluctant in letting go. You were screaming hoping anyone would here you though your head was facing the ground. 

Suddenly his weight was flying off of you, a particularly loud groan falling from his lips, you scrambled onto shaky feet. Warm hands wrapped around your biceps pulling you up, “stay behind me,” the voice grunted. Your fingers curled around the back of  their coat head buried in their back, “You’ve got some nerve showing up here  Rumlow ,” Bucky's voice growled.

Rumlow’s chuckle sent a shiver rolling down your spine, “funny Barnes, you think you’re the only one that knew what that rat was hiding, I discovered her long before you ever did and it got me  kinda wishing he  didn't fuck up like he did, she  woulda been a pretty little thing to sweep up right under her  fathers nose,”

You heard another groan leave  Rumlow’s mouth, “you really taking those rats words to heart, really trying to protect his prized  possession ?” he taunted.

“I’m doing my job,” Bucky growled, “ I'm protecting my streets from the likes of you.”

“ so then hand her over and I'll be on my way.”

Bucky scoffed, “fat chance, you can either go about your way now, or I can have my men rough you up a little bit more, take your pick.”

“well I know when I'm not welcomed,” he chuckled, “ I'll be seeing you Barnes, oh and y/n,” he called out to you making another shiver roll through you, “ I'll be seeing you soon sweetheart, and hopefully it’ll be our last,” the threat had your breath catching in your throat, fingers turning white from the grip you had on Bucky’s coat.

You weren’t sure how long you stood their frozen behind him, only moving when  Bucky's words ghosted to your ear, “let’s get you home y/n”

The ride home was tense, you were  sandwiched between Bucky and Steve both men tense beside you. Bucky seemed ready to combust in anger and you weren’t sure what was holding him back, you knew you’d more than likely be on the  receiving end of it, you just hoped you’d be able to give it right back.

You were silent as you pulled into the driveway of your home, and remained silent as you were guided into the house, ushered through the corridor and into your father’s office. Bucky asked the  others to leave the two of you alone for a few minutes. You were tense as you heard him close the  french doors behind you, eyes trailing his form as he rounded the desk as he took a seat in front of you, just like the first day you had met.

“I only want to ask this once, and I need you to answer me without any of that goddamn sass falling from your mouth,” you remained quiet,  “what the hell happened this morning y/n?”

“I-I wasn’t able to sleep much last night so I decided to start my morning early and head to the  cemetery after having received your first message that it would be a small and short  event when I arrived I met with Catherine wh-”

“ oh so you do receive my text messages, am I to guess you only choose which ones to reply to?” he questioned brow raised.

You were taken aback by the tone of his voice, “what are you talking about?”

He laughed head thrown back slightly, “I really want to believe your nothing like your father, but I don’t know y/n you make it very hard,”

You couldn’t help the scoff that slipped past your lips, “you’re one to talk,” you muttered.

Bucky leaned forwards hands bracing himself against the desk, “what was that sweetheart, you say something?”

“I said,” you growled, “that you’re one to talk, you want to bring up believing that I'm nothing like my father, but I don’t know Barnes, you’re doing the same exact thing hiding things from me, saying that you’re not the enemy, that my father was, yet you and him seem to be real good at hiding the truth from me,”

Bucky stood from his seat, a menacing glare on his face as he leaned towards you, “you should really watch how you speak to me y/n don’t want to end up like your mommy and daddy do you?”

Your eyes filled with tears at his words, but you wouldn’t allow yourself to fall victim to his anger, oh no, you planned on dishing it right back. You pushed up from the chair reaching for the manila folders you had pushed aside last night.

“so were you the one that sent  Rumlow after my parents or was that pierce,” you hissed, “are you three all working together, was this letter my father ‘wrote’ to you just some rogue for me to find?” you questioned throwing the paper down onto the desk, “were those words you shared with  Rumlow , just things said to throw me off, send me right into the arms of the wolf in  sheep's clothing” your voice seemingly  raised with each question, “do you even own this city or are you just another rat like my father was working right under Pierce?”

“Enough!” he demanded slamming his hand onto the wooden desk.

“No!” you voiced right back, “I want answers, and I want them now!” you hissed.

“You’re playing a dangerous game here y/n, you better stop while you have the chance,” he replied voice dripping in malice.

“the letter,” you continued disregarding his threat, “is it real or did you plant it there for me to find when you broke into this house, the day I arrived?”

Bucky chuckled though the situation was far from amusing, “I didn’t break into your house, as co-owner of this damned property I helped your father get I also got a pair of keys, and as for the letter and all this mess your father left on the desk it wasn’t planted by me or my men, it was already here when I let myself in to  _ my _ home.”

“did you ever receive that letter?” you questioned,” you needed to know if his contract tied in to this letter.

Your heart skipped a beat in your chest when he shook his head, his eyes skimming over the letter now that it had been brought to his attention, “your father must not have had the time to get it delivered, once he had been found out that he was meeting with me your father remained under Pierce’s very watchful eyes, he must have not had a way to get it out to me,”

“b-but you said that either I let you collect or the men my father worked for would collect, how would you know that if you hadn’t read that very letter you’re holding?” you questioned.

Bucky sighed letting the paper drop to the desk fingers rubbing at the tick in jaw, “listen y/n the men your father associated and worked for, men like me, we’re ruthless, if something is owed we collect, our ways of collecting varies but I have a feeling you know that when Pierce is going to collect that’s the end of the line for you, or at least in this case for your father it was”

“so when you had me sign that contract you had no idea about my father’s letter?”

Bucky was shaking his head again, “I had no idea, like I said once Pierce found out about your father’s association with me he completely cut his ties, I hadn’t seen or heard of your father in almost months till just recently when Detective Stark informed me of the accident,”

You took in a shaky breath, “what did happen to my parents?”

“It was made to look like a car accident, a bullet hole to each of your parents head is what did them in,”

You tried to hold back your tears though your resolve was quickly breaking, you fell back into the seat, everything that was once unanswered was now seemingly coming to the light. You were now aware of who Pierce,  Rumlow and Barnes were, you were now  seemingly aware of Barnes contract and the letter that your father had written. The only thing you were still unaware of was why, why was your father working for these men, what did he think he would gain from working for notorious men of New York.

You were stumped, and you felt hopeless, a small part of you had hoped that when you had come across that letter your father had written that It might tie back to Bucky’s contract and why he was holding you here, you had wanted to believe he was actually keeping you safe especially after the meeting you had today with Pierce, but now you weren’t sure what to believe. If your father had been capable of kicking you out at the ripe age of 18, Pierce confident enough to threaten you in broad daylight, and Rumlow sure enough of himself to almost take your life, who was to say Bucky wasn’t like all of them.

“I told you y/n you should have just stopped while you had the chance, you really have no idea what you’re getting into, your father’s work was messy, and I guess he did right by you by keeping you in the dark, this world isn’t made for someone like you,”

“then let me go, let me go home, let me get far away from here, from them, from you!” you cried.

“that’s not how this works, and you’ll do right in learning that-”

“That what?!” you questioned exasperatedly cutting him off, “I don’t belong to you, what you’re doing here is keeping me against my will,”

“I’m keeping you safe,” he butted in 

“keeping me safe?” you scoffed, “you’re just like them Barnes, you’re no better than my father or the men that he worked for, you’re not better than Pierce or  Rumlow , you’re a rat just like them!”

His fist was meeting the table again, “you think I'm as ruthless as them, you think I’m no better than them, oh sweetheart you really should have just stayed quiet, but I guess what you’re doing here is  really begging to be shown the hard way that I'm not your goddamned enemy, though I think you’ve just made one of me.” he hissed.

Your anger was quickly dissipating at the tone of his voice, your once  strong-willed frame cowering under his intense stare, “got nothing to say,” he grunted, “no  smart-ass remarks for me” you shook your head form shivering, not wanting to see what this man was truly capable of.

Your form cowered when he began to bark orders, Steve and another man rushed in, “bring me the contract,” he grunted. Your eyes remained on him, his on yours, Steve was coming back to his side a  folder being pushed into his hands.

Bucky pulled the stapled papers from the folder, “I was doing you a favor by writing up this contract, keeping you safe from men your father worked for, but since you think  I'm just like them,” he growled fingers tearing the documents right down the middle, “well I think  it's time I  showed you just how ruthless I can be, hopefully I'll live up to your expectations,” he hissed throwing the torn papers at you, you took a shaky step back.

“I want you out of this house today, hell even right now Steve will call up a driver for you,” you didn’t need to turn around to know Steve was already on the phone his voice sounding just outside of the room. “Everything your parents left behind is now mine, I would let you go through their things, but I still need to collect for everything your father took from me, and valuables will just have to do,”

“b-but if you don’t collect my father’s boss will,” you murmured, head downcast, though your eyes still remained on Bucky.

“this is me collecting,” he stated calmly, “as for your father’s goons collecting well that’s just none of my concern what or rather who they come to collect, as long as they don’t collect on my turf there won’t be a problem, I'm sure you’ll be long gone from my area by the time they choose to do so,”

Your heart stopped in your chest, “but you said you would keep me safe,” you spoke meekly your fear rising as you thought about  Rumlow having his hands on you once more.

Bucky chuckled darkly, “Pierce and  Rumlow don’t protect their people, they don’t keep them safe, they don’t keep a roof over their heads, and they surely don’t make sure no harm comes to those dear to them,”

“but-”

“but what y/n, I told you I can be a very patient man but you just couldn’t stop, you just couldn’t leave well enough alone, you wanted to believe I was evil like the scum of men your father worked for, you couldn’t just give me a chance, you know you really are like your father,” he hissed, “and just like your parents you’ll get  what's coming to you, and for your sake I hope its quick like your parents,”

His words buried themselves deep within you, tears  springing to your eyes, “boss cab’s here” Steves voice called out.

He looked away from you for a second to give  Steve a short nod, “It’s time for you to go y/n,” he spoke eyes drifting back to you, he looked like he wanted to say more, like he was at a battle with his own mind, but that was quickly diminished, “I hope you’ll have a safe trip back home, I'll have your bags sent to you along with a letter from Wilson to fully sign over the residence to me, and I will also have Catherine send you a bill,”

A broken “okay” fell from your lips, the fear, the pain, the overwhelming heartbreak was relentless but you had brought this upon yourself, you had been your own undoing. 

“Stever will see you to the door ,” you turned numbly no longer wanting to be in his presence, the need to get away strong.

Steves hard demeanor had returned as he ushered you out of the office, and through the front door of your old home. He walked you to the cab opening the door for you, you slid in silently, Steve rattling off the location of where to take you, before he shut the door he turned to you, “when you get home y/n, you pack up whatever you can carry and you run, you run and don’t look back, you may think the boss is some ruthless lying thief, but he’s far from it, he takes care of his people, his city, he makes sure no harm ever comes to those dear to him, and he works hard to make sure Pierce and  Rumlow can’t take that from him, I’ll pray for your safety just as I'm sure the boss will too, It’s a long shot, but hopefully we’ll see each other around soon, take care of yourself y/n,” the tears are now streaming steadily as Steve closes the door, his hands patting the cab to send you off.

The cab pulls away, but not before you turn to look at your old home catching a glimpse of Bucky watching your departure from the window of your father’s office. The cab is quick to pull away your eyes focused on the streets ahead,  you're in your mind, warbled  thoughts bouncing around. While you wished you had listened to your father about staying away and never returning, in a way you were glad you did, now you knew of the horrors that lurked in the dark, now all you had to do was sleep with one eye open and never stop running. You wished you had been as resilient as you had been when you were younger, wished you were as gullible in trusting as you had been then, maybe you wouldn’t now be running for your life from men who you knew were far more ruthless than James Buchanan Barnes.

You come to a  red-light turning green, unaware of the black sedan that is speeding at the small cab from the right. The cab is rolling midway when the sedan knocks into your side, sending the yellow cabbie barreling across the road, flipping on its top. Blood is rushing to your head, low groans falling from your lips as you blink owlishly, the driver is out, blood seeping from a wound in his head. Your eyes widen when you see a pair of feet walking towards you, you squirm in your locked form, a plea of no’s falling from your lips. A shriek is leaving your lips when he appears by the window, a knife sliding in through the trashed glass. 

He grins  maliciously , “didn’t I say I'd be seeing you soon?”

A scream is barely leaving your lips before your head is crashing into the top of the car, the world around you falling black.


	8. Comin For You

Your return to  consciousness is painful one, a sharp intake of breath has pain spiraling throughout your body. Colorful spots contour the  sides of your eyes , and you find yourself having to  bite  down on your lower lip to keep from crying out.

You try to move but find that your wrist are bound by ties behind your back, thick rope secured around your body, woven around the back of the steel chair your being held to. Your face scrunches painfully, what you can only presume to be dry blood cracks around the right side of your face.

Gathering your bearings and the little strength that you can muster you lift your head a little higher trying to figure out where the hell you had been dragged to, you know who has you, you’re just unsure where they’re holding you.

A low hiss is falling from your lips when you turn your head a little too far, “it’s about time you woke up,” a dark voice calls from your left. Your head whips around to the sound in fear, eyes wide in the darkened room. “I was beginning to think I may have completed the job,” footsteps drew him closer to you, “didn’t think I'd be able to actually enjoy taking your life, right before your very eyes,” he grins looming above you.

You knew your end was inevitable, “just get it over with, Rumlow, there’s no need to drag this out any further,” you hissed.

He was laughing, fingers gripping your face roughly as he crowded your space, “you’re a bossy little one aren’t you, I'm sorry to say y/n but you’re death won’t come as quick as your parents, oh no,” he chuckled darkly, “I’m going to drag it out, have you bleed out on this very floor, and when you’re on the brink of it, I'll make sure Barnes is here to witness it, that ought to be a great treat for him don’t you think?” he questioned, “getting to witness the death of the rats special possession, shit I think that just may be enough to cover your dad’s collection.”

“do whatever you want, it’s not like any of it matters anymore, you’ve won, so do your worse,” you grunted the pain overwhelming.

Rumlow pushed your head away roughly, his jaw ticking in anger, “what no fight, no screaming, kicking, crying?” he growled, “where’s the fighter Barnes told me you were, hmmm?” 

Your heart was dropping in your chest, blood running cold, had this been Bucky’s doing, had he informed Rumlow that you were game for them to come after? You didn’t want to believe it, you wanted to believe he was the man that Steve had told you he was, but you had angered him, had made him upset who’s to say he didn’t give them a tip about you.

“I’m done fighting, what’s there left to fight for?” you questioned with a hum, “you murdered my parents, I have no siblings, I guess Barnes was right, there was nothing left for me,”

Rumlow growled, the noise ripping from his mouth, his foot kicked at the chair roughly sending you flying onto your back harshly, “By the time I'm through with you, you’ll be begging for me to let you go,” he growled. He sent a swift kick to  your already  battered side before his footsteps were retreating him back into the darkness, “rest up y/n, you’ll need it,” he growled.

Silent tears streamed down your face as you tried to choke back your sobs, you wished you had stayed away, but was there any running  from  this life, a life you never signed up for ? You were scared, the fear nearly choking you but what was there left for you to do, you had messed up with Bucky. You just hoped your end would be just as quick as that of your parents.

Bucky was sitting at  what  was now your  fathers old desk looking over  the things he had left behind, the things that you had sorted through. A frustrated sigh was leaving his lips, his hands shoving the papers aside. He leaned back in the chair fingers running over his jaw , he was angry, angry at you father, angry at you, but worse he was angry with himself.

He was very well aware of what he did when he sent you from this house , he just hoped you had gotten far enough from here , but he also knew your chances had been slim.

“You ready to go Buck?” Bucky’s eyes glanced up, Steve’s eyes already on his , waiting .

“What are you still doing here Steve  you  should’ve gone home, Peggy’s going to have my head if you’re late another night,” 

He’s laughing lowly but the amusement isn’t meeting his eyes, “she would have had mine if she knew I left you still working,” but what he really wants to say is she will have both their heads if she finds out what they’ve done, and its peggy so he knows she will.

“Is it really working if I’m just sorting through trash in my home,” the sentence leaves a foul taste in his mouth.

“Bucky you-” Steve was cut off by the front door slamming, hurried footsteps running down the corridor, Bucky and Steve were on guard but relaxed when they saw it was just Detective Stark.

“where is she?!” he questioned out of breath.

Bucky raised a brow, “where’s who?” 

Tony glared at him, “cut the shit Barnes, y/n, where’s y/n?”

Bucky doesn’t like the worry in his voice, “she left we-”

“what do you mean she left; she didn’t happen to take a cab did she?” his voice rising with each word.

“Tony what the hell is going on, what are you doing here asking about y/n shouldn’t you be out patrolling or something?” Bucky’s growing worried now, he knows the words that are hanging on Tony’s tongue but he’s stalling, he doesn’t want to hear them.

“oh for crying out loud,” he groaned throwing his hands in the air, “there’s been an accident a few lights down, the cabbie involved said his passenger was missing, said the last thing he heard was her scream in terror, thought he had been dreaming it, so now tell me where the hell is y/n and did you send her off in a cab,”

“was it Rumlow?”

“was it Rumlow, was it Rumlow, so you did send her off” he’s looking at him in disbelief, “of course it was that bastard who else do you think would take her, they want her out of the picture Barnes, you really think they were going to wait till she was out of your area to take her,” Tony’s rubbing at his brows in frustration, “as much as I would like to question why the hell you just let her go knowing a threat like Pierce or Rumlow was waiting to snatch her up I need to find her before something horrible happens to her, I know your well aware of what those men are capable of,”

“Where are you going Stark?” Bucky’s demanding watching his form retreat from the room.

“I’m going to find her,” he barks out, “and you better hope not a single hair on her damn head has been touched because then it won’t be just Rumlow and Pierce I'll be taking down, I'll take you down as well,”

“Stark,” Bucky’s barking back, Tony’s turning to face him, “I get she might have gave you a run for your money seeing as she didn’t take your shit, but she was innocent to all this, Barnes she hadn't seen her parents since the age of 18, she hadn’t even had the chance to mourn, she was freaked out, you have to understand if she hurt your manhood it's because she was scared, she doesn’t know this city, at least not what she remembered it to be anymore, now if you please I need to go see if I can find her,” he murmured before he was once more turning on his heel marching out of the office.

Steve was looking to Bucky with wide eyes, regret eating at him for even putting you in that cab, just like Bucky, he knew the possibilities of you being taken were high, he just didn’t think it would happen this quick.

“do you think they knew?” 

“of course they fucking knew Steve, they followed her to the cemetery, they knew where she lived, Pierce was having her followed, way before she even got here,” he’s angry again at himself, the worry of what Rumlow is capable of doing to you making his blood boil.

“what are we going to do, he did it in our area, that’s enough for us to get on this as well,”

“Call in the other’s I want everyone in our area that is available to help, to help," Steve's nodding his head phone already in hand, “oh and Steve,” Steve looks over to him phone to his ear, “call in Natasha, give her a heads up on the situation, maybe she heard something,”

“But Buck I could blow-”

“I said call Natasha,” he’s growling, “I need everyone Steve, and that includes her too,” 

Steve knew it would be dangerous if he caught Natasha at a bad time, but he also knew she might be the only one to give him a possible lead on your whereabouts, if she had indeed heard anything.

While Steve got in contact with the other’s Bucky stood from the desk pacing the room, this was his fault, if he had just understood and for once not done things without really thinking them through you probably would have still been here safe. Tony was right, everything he had said was true, he wasn’t used to someone giving him his shit back like you did, so he retaliated, albeit not in the best manner but he never expected it to get this far.

He was hoping you would stay quiet, leave well enough alone, but you just had to go and say those things about him, things that were far from true, and he had let the pain your words brought him blind him with rage, and so he did what he always did and he took matters into his own hands. That’s where he had messed up and that’s why he had to fix this, he was responsible for this happening to you, so he was going to get you out of this, if you were still alive.

Bucky was still pacing the room when Steve returned, looking much like tony from earlier, “Natasha knows where she is,”

Bucky looks over at his friend, “how did she find out?” he questioned in disbelief.

Steve swallowed the lump in his throat, “she drove them there, but Buck if we get y/n out in whatever condition she may be in, you need to get Natasha out too, she believes they’re onto her,”

“were getting her out alive, and we’re getting Natasha too,” he reached for his coat, set on going to go get you.

Steve caught his arm at the door, “we can’t go Buck, Rumlow is still there with y/n, if we go now, it could cause her her life, not only hers but Nat’s as well,”

A growl of frustration is leaving Bucky’s lips, “why, what’s holding us back Steve, we know where she is, we can get Nat as well, we need to go now,”

“We can’t!” Steve argues, “Natasha is there with them right now,  Rumlow h as her outside on guard, it doesn’t sound good Buck,” Steve eyes close as he remembers your scream, “we need to wait, Natasha said she will inform me if anything changes, and when it’ll be a  good time for us to head in, but for now we need to wait, you need to wait if you don’t want to make things worse,”

“But”

“But nothing Buck, we wait, we wait and we make things right if it’s not to late,”

Bucky knows Steve’s right, but he doesn’t like this, he doesn’t like having to wait for orders, he needs to make things right, to make them as they should have been from the beginning.

Another scream is tearing from your lips as he drives the knife in deeper to your thigh,  “who knew you were so vocal?” he chuckles darkly.

Rumlow ha d  barely given you enough time to rest, it seems he had only been gone  minutes before he was returning with a duffle bag that he threw by your side. The torture he had planned for you starting the second that bag was zipped open. He had been relentless,  he would throw a punch here, a kick there, stuff you could handle, it was when he produced the first knife, drew his first line on your skin that you knew you might not survive the first day , maybe your death would be quick like your parents.

It seemed Rumlow loved to hear you whimper, moan, or scream in pain, it’s what drove him to continue. You tried to hold back to not give him the satisfaction he was after but it was hard, and you could feel your body growing weak, wanting to give into the pain, creep into the darkness that was clouding the sides of your vision.

“ Come on y/n” he growls gripping your face in his hands, knife running along your cheek, all you can bring yourself to do is wince as the blade kisses your skin. “You were so vocal a second ago, don’t give up on me just yet,”

“End it Rumlow, just end it,” you groan head falling back from blood loss.

“Son of a bitch!” He growls sending the chair flying back , you don’t react to it your body growing numb. This is it you think, this is the end.

You can hear rumlow growling profanities falling from his lips as his anger boils from within him, suddenly he’s over you knife cutting through your restraints. He pulls you from the chair harshly dragging you through the abandoned warehouse, “I though you would be a little more fun to take down than your parents were, it seems I was wrong, we’ll just have to take you out quicker than planned,”

You can barely keep  up with his pace, your leg screaming at you to stop,  the  darkened areas pulling more and more at your sight. A rough palm to your cheek has your jarring, your outside, the black sedan  parked feet away from you, a redhead by the drivers door.

“Rumlow is gripping your head in his hand, a dark smile pulls at his lips, “ you wanted a death like your parents well we’ll give you one,” he’s looking over your shoulder at the red head, “I want you to run y/n, get as far as you can, though I doubt you’ll make it far, but just in case,” he’s producing the knife again, the object shining in the light of the moon before it’s meeting the thigh of your other leg, another scream falls from your lips, “shame you couldn’t have done that earlier, we could have played longer,”

He’s letting go of your face, your body falling to your knees the wounds in your legs screaming in protest . He walks away from you to where the black sedan is parked, his words are low but through your hazy hearing you are able to pick up the last few he grunts out to the woman, “you want to prove yourself to me,  finish the job,”

You can’t hear much else except the crunching of gravel, you’re being hauled up  again. Your legs struggling to keep you up .

Rumlows in your face again, it’s like he’s begging to be the last thing you see before your demise, “go y/n, run, I’ll give you a  generous head start even , it’s all open land here so there’s nowhere for you to hide, so you better get far,”

He’s pushing your forward then, your body stumbling, your feet push you past the black sedan where the redhead sits waiting .  You’re not far when you hear the engine turn. 

A low whimper falls from your lips, you know you weren’t meant to get away, but there had been a small part of you that wished it had been different.

You push on, legs barely holding you up as you scramble on the uneven gravel . Your ears pick up on the tires speeding towards you, a sob leaves your lips as your body drops to the floor no longer being able to go. Your eyes fall shut waiting for the pain, but it never comes it feels like hours though you’re sure it’s minutes possibly seconds before you feel hands on you, your eyes struggle to open, but you do the best you can as you glance up the redhead  dragging your limp body.

“I’m sorry if I’m hurting you, but please hold on,” she grunts as she holds you up against the van the door opening.

You’re not sure what’s going on, but the need to close your eyes is strong again,  “take my hand,” she’s speaking again, “I need you to squeeze my hand, I’m going to get you somewhere safe, just please stay awake,”

Your eyes are fluttering as you struggle to keep them open, the blood loss making your hearing go funny, you can hear the redhead speaking in a rushed tone but you can’t make out what she’s saying.

“Hey come on now squeeze my hand, you have to stay awake for me please,”

You want to tell her you’re fine, that you just need to close your eyes for a tiny bit, but you know it’s far from the trut h. Though there’s a possibility that you are indeed getting somewhere safe  you also know you won’t last much longer to find out, you’ve lost a lot of blood, maybe you’d finally get to see your parents after seven years you think as you finally give in to the pull.


	9. Back in Black

Natasha catches the moment your hand becomes lax in hers; an overwhelming guilt consumes her because she could have done something earlier, she could have avoided this happening to you, could have stopped the torture Rumlow put you through.

“y/n,” she’s yelling, her hand tugging on yours but you sit there unmoving head fallen to the side.

“fuck!” she yells hitting the steering wheel, she wants to pull over check your pulse, make sure you’re breathing but she can’t, she needs to get you two far away from this area. There’s no telling what Rumlow will do once he realizes Natasha isn’t returning for him, one call to Pierce and he’ll have the whole town hunting you down like a pack of wild dogs. Natasha’s heart is pounding away heavily in her ears, a part of her wants to pull over into the darkness and make a call, but she’s afraid your life will further slip away in her hands if she diddles around trying to get you help. So she makes a call of her own as she presses her foot harder onto the gas, the sedan surging forward.

“have you heard anything from Natasha?” Bucky is questioning again from his seat at the kitchen table, he had been restless since Steve had been made aware of your ware  abouts but had not allowed him to go in and retrieve you till he was given the word. Steve’s answer is the same as it had been for the last two hours, “not yet Buck,” he sighs rubbing at his tired eyes, “I’m sure we will s-”

He’s cut off by the devil herself appearing in the doorway her face ghostly pale, “come outside now, I need to get her in!” she’s rushing out as she disappears out the door as quickly as she had appeared.

It’s takes both Steve and Bucky a minute to realize that, that wa s Natasha , but the second they do chairs are scraping against tiled floor as they ra ce out after her.

The men come out to find a  black sedan parked out front,  Natasha on the passenger side of the vehicle. Steve and Bucky make there way to her and Bucky swears his heart drops.

“You need to call banner,” Natashas speaking up her voice wavering, “she has a pulse but it’s barely there, we can’t risk a hospital , pierce has too many eyes,  I also need this sedan taken care of, I left Rumlow behind at the  warehouse  but  I’m positive he already has people out looking for us,”

The words are going in one ear and out the other Bucky just can’t wrap his head around it as he takes in your broken form, “Barnes!” Natasha is barking, “h elp me get her inside, Steve please get banner here and get this sedan out of here!”

Steve is moving before Bucky can even register  her words, “oh for Christ’s sake,”she’s groaning watching Bucky’s still unmoving form, she’s getting in his view then , her hands taking a hold of his face, “if you want to try and fix your wrong doings, you need to help me save her life first, please help me do right by her, so that you can too, get her inside Barnes, now!”

He’s only barely registering her words before she’s pushing him towards the opening of the van. He doesn’t hesitate any further as his arms slide underneath your unresponsive body, “Nat,” he’s calling out,  “I need you to check for a pulse,” she’s moving forward the second he has you out of the seat, her fingers pressing against your neck .

There’s a pregnant pause, “it’s there, but barely,” she removes her fingers, “just get her inside I’ll ask Steve about banner,” Bucky can barely even register what’s going on around him as he gets you into the house , his sole focus is you.  The anger that had been there hours before has now been replaced with guilt, he had done this to you, had he himself just left it alone, let you cope the way you needed to o nothi ng this horrible would have happened to you. 

Not quite know ing the layout  of the house he’s racing upstairs where he’s sure there’s a spare bedroom  he can lay you down in.  He puts you down gently onto the mattress, fingers pushing away the bloodied hair matted to your face. His breath catches in  his throat when your eyes flutter ever so slightly,  fingers twitching  “please” you mumble.

His breath catches i n his throat eyes disbelieving that you’re even speaking with the condition your in, he can see  you’re  fighting to open your eyes, “hey hey woah,” he murmurs surging forward his hand cupping your cheek, “slow down doll, you’re okay, you’re safe now,”

He’s kneeling then to get to your level, your eyes flutter open, but he can see your barely holding on, “I’m s cared, it hurts so bad, ” you murmur through a weak voice.

“We’re going to get you some help y/n,  we’ve got you,  you’re safe now,” he’s trying to keep you awake, keep you talking a little longer .

“I’m so sorry, I should have believed you, I, I” your voice is wavering, eyes  fluttering as you fight to keep them open.

Bucky’s body goes into panic, “y/n,”  he calls, “sweetheart keep your eyes open for me,” he’s patting your cheek, “stay with me sweetheart, come on now,”

Your eyes are falling shut, fingers falling limp at your sides, “goddamnit, y/n” he growls, “Steve!” he's screaming through the open door, “where’s banner!”

Bucky can hear the thumping of several feet running up the flight of stairs and he hopes to god that one of those sets are Banners, and it's as if god is hearing his prayers for once, Banner appears with Steve albeit out of breath, but he’s there, and Bucky can feel himself visibly relax even slightly.

As soon as Banner’s eyes are landing on your form he’s surging forward pushing past both Steve and Bucky as he crowds you, “what the hell did you do this poor girl,” he’s questioning bewildered.

“It was Rumlow,” Bucky’s grunting.

A sigh is leaving Banner’s lips as he places his bag down, hands already getting to work, “of course,” he grumbles, “but my question is how did she find herself in the hands of a man like Rumlow to begin with, she doesn’t even look like she belongs in this goddamn forsaken city.”

“It was her parents, her father worked for pierce,  he apparently had eyes on her for awhile now and well-”

“Wait, wait,  wait, is this y/n y/l/n, the girl who’s father signed her off for your collection,”

Bucky sighed rubbing at his eyes, “yes, but we broke the contract, and I sent her away, and well,” his words got lost on his tongue.

“So this happened because of you?”banners turning them fingers stilling around the scissors in his hands.

“Yeah , they must have  been keeping a close eye on her,”

“Goddamnit it Barnes, you better hope this girl survives, because if she doesn’t so help me,”

“Then save her banner!” He growls, “save her then SHE can give me shit, I don’t need it from you,”

Bucky’s body is thrumming with rage as he storms out of the bedroom, shoulder knocking into Steve’s as he rushes down the stairs heading straight for the fathers study. He goes straight for the desk, his hands knocking into the papers, throwing them to the ground in his rage. Nothing is safe in his wake as he tears apart the room.

“Barnes!” he hears his name, but he can’t bring himself to stop.

“Buck, man come on, quit!” Steves grunting as he gets his arms around him, Bucky turns on him shoving him back.

Buckys breathing heavily as he watches him stumble back his hands raised, “this isn’t you Buck, this isn’t who you are,”

“but isn’t it,” he’s growling, “my father raised me in this life, he was ruthless to me, my mom, and  becca , at least she was able to get away from all of this, but my father made me who I am, he gave me this name!”

“but the name doesn’t justify who you are as a person Buck, it doesn’t make you who you are, that’s all you, and this,” he grunts waving his hand around the room at the mess bucky has left in his wake, “this is not who you are,”

“It is Steve,” he’s arguing, “look at what happened to y/n because of me, because of who I am,”

Steve’s getting angry now as he moves forward shoving at Bucky, “that, wasn’t, you,” he growls shoving at Bucky’s shoulder with each word, “that was Rumlow, could you have avoided it by just leaving well enough alone and taking the shit she had to dish at you absolutely, but that was not your fault, none of us knew what Rumlow was going to do,”

Bucky’ body finally sags as he finally lets his words sink in, “Buck if you’re going to blame yourself then  im at fault too because I let her go, and Natasha as well because she could have stopped him the minute she got my call about you,”

“but it’s n-”

“then it’s not your fault either, we can’t place a blame here buck, because then we’re all at fault, what we need to do is try to mend it, fix it, and make sure nothing like this ever happens again,”

“how can I do that when I've messed up this bad, her dad asked me to protect her, to keep her safe from the very men that did this to her, and I couldn’t even do that,” he murmured shaking his head.

Steve’s raising a brow at him in confusion, “what do you mean a letter, we hadn’t received anything from y/n’s father in months.”

“he was never able to send it, as soon as pierce found out about him working with me, he had him under a watchful eye up until the last day, they even found y/n and when they did he tried reaching out to me, asked me to collect, to keep her safe, I guess in a way we were even, I failed him like he failed me,”

“Jesus Buck,” Steve was shaking his head.

“guys, Banner wants to see you two in the kitchen, the others are here as well,” Natasha speaks up from where she appears in the doorway.

Steve’s looking at Bucky before he’s turning on his heel trailing after her, Bucky following suit.

The chatter sounding through the kitchen falls once Bucky has entered, his eyes are falling on Banner’s, “how is she?” is the first thing to fall from his lips.

Banner sighs, rubbing at the cooled sweat that collected on his brows, “she’s going to survive, she lost quite a bit of blood, but not enough for a transfusion and you can thank Natasha for that, had she not gotten her as quick as she did, there would have been nothing I could have done,”

“how many days will she be out?”

“I’d say for the next two to three days she’ll be in and out, she needs to rest so someone will have to be watching her at all times and I of course will be dropping by to make sure she’s okay over the course of the next few days,”

Bucky nodded in understanding, “I’ll be here, I’ll watch over her, with that being said we need to keep our eyes peeled, with Natasha making the call she did I don’t doubt she’s right about pierce having his men out on the search for them, so we need to be vigilant, I need everyone to be checking in with me or Steve every hour, I need to know you guys are safe,”

“what are you going to do with Y/n?” Tony’s questioning from his spot next to Banner.

“There’s no denying that she has a target on her back now,” Bucky paused as he thought over his next words, “what I would like to do is keep her in this area, there’s just no way I can send her back to her old home,  Rumlow knows where she lives,”

Tony’s brows are furrowing, “and how does he know that?”

A sigh was leaving his lips, “In y/n’s father’s office there is various pictures of her father and mother, taken  I'm assuming months possibly days before they were killed, towards the end of the stack there was pictures of y/n at what I can only assume was her apartment where she resided, how  Rumlow got ahold of where she resided I have no idea, but this just shows me they’re capable of anything.” There’s a pregnant pause before he’s continuing, “there was also a letter from Mr. Y/l/n, one that he was unable to have given to me before  Rumlow got ahold of them, y/n had brought it to my attention- ”

“and what does it say?” Stark butt in, Bucky sends him a scolding glare.

“he was asking me to protect her, to get to her before they did, her father knew that they had a means to collect and they would do so in the same manner that they-”

“hold up, hold up, let’s back track a second here,” he butts in again, “ let me get something straight, so you knew that you were asked to protect her against THEM yet you send her out on her ass,” he’s asking voice rising in anger “you really couldn’t hold your ego for two seconds, and mmm I don’t know get the hell over it?”

“Enough Stark,” he’s hissing eyes turning to slits, “you don’t think I’m already blaming myself for the condition that she is currently in, you don’t think that I've thought about how I could have  handled all this better so that she didn’t have to go through what she did at the hands of that rat, I’ve made a mistake, and I'll be damned if I don’t do all that I can to fix this, as much as her father abused my trust, she’s innocent in all this madness, and I'm going to keep my word, and I will keep her safe,”

“and how do you plan on doing that, how exactly are you going to keep her safe, you couldn’t even keep your own mother or sister safe from the monster that was your father how are you any better?” something in Bucky snaps at Starks words, his body flying forward as he lunges for the man. The room erupts into chaos, Steve  dodging Bucky’s attack his arms encircling around the enraged man.

“let him go Rogers, let him give me a reason to put him behind bars where he deserves!”

“Enough Tony,” Steve’s grunting trying to hold Bucky down, “that was low even for you, the man his father was is not who he is, and it would be wise if you realized it,”

“or what?” he’s taunting, “is he going to kick me out on my ass as well, let  Rumlow get his hands on me,”

Steve has had it with Tony’s back talk when he decides to loosen his hold on his  best friend , time stills as Bucky lunges for Tony, the room falling silent as they watch the two, waiting with baited breath for shit to hit the fan but it never comes. Bucky stands face to face with Tony, breath coming out in huffs as he glares down the man, “think what you want Stark, you’re not the one I need to fix things with, nor are you the one I owe an apology too, whether y/n accepts my offer or not, she is now under my protection, if someone so much as imposes a threat to her I will personally see to it that it does not occur again, and that goes for anyone in this room as well, my father was a ruthless man, and he may not have cared what happened to his men in this line of business but I do, and whether you are able to ever get over the fact that I am my father’s son that is solely on you Detective Stark,”

That is the last thing Bucky can bring himself to say before he’s retreating away from him. He is tired, not only physically but emotionally as well, “I want everyone to go home,” he announces suddenly to the room” go home, get some rest, and we can meet over the next few days to come up with a game plan” he’s turning to look at Steve, “that includes you as well Rogers, get home to  Peggy ,” he  sees the second Steve goes to argue, “and that’s an order, I'm where I need to be right now, so your done for the night, all I ask of each of you is to check in with me when you can, or with each other it doesn’t matter, I just need to know you’re safe, while Pierce knows not to bring his dirty business into my area, with the events that have transpired today there’s no telling what they’ll do now, so we need to be on high alert always, the second shit goes south you let me know and we’ll get this sorted,”

There are low murmurs of agreement sounding throughout the room, as some of them begin to file out of the area, Steve of course stays behind to check on Bucky, “you okay?”

Bucky’s looking at his friend, “ I'll be fine,” he murmurs, “what are you still doing here punk,  peggy’s really going to have my head,”

Steve’s laughing, a shake of his head, “Peggy worries for  you Buck, she knows what this life does to you, we all worry about you, you know,” he sighs, “you’re so bust worrying about our well-being that I think you forget to worry about  your’s it’s like you’ve lost yourself since D-”

Bucky’s holding up his hand, “please don’t Steve, I promise I’m fine I-”

Natasha’s appearing in the doorway, eyes slightly wide, “it’s y/n, she’s awake, and she’s asking for you Barnes,”


	10. A Little Help From My Friends

Before he follows Natasha he’s turning to Steve, “get home to Peggy,  tell her I’m fine, I’ll hav e Natasha stay here to make sure she’s safe,”  he’s  turning to face her when he speaks her name, “that’s fine with me,” she replies.

Steve sighs but oblige s  anyway, “you’ll call if anything goes awry?”

A small smile tugs at the corner of  Bucky’s mouth, “you already know I will, now please get home, and get some rest, for both of us please,”

“alright well I'll be back tomorrow,” he murmurs bringing him in for an embrace, 

“and I don’t expect anything less, now go, before I kick you out myself,” Bucky murmurs pushing his friend towards the door. 

Once he made sure Steve was out the door, he followed Natasha up the flight of stairs to the room he had left you in, the closer he got to your door the heavier his feet felt. Natasha stood just outside the partially opened door waiting, once he drew closer, she stepped to the side, “I’ll let you two talk for a minute, I'll be in the other room if you need me,” He thanked her quietly, waiting till she disappeared behind the door of the other room, sucking in a breath, his hand came to the door pushing it open, his feet leading him in.

He stopped feet shy of the bed, your gaze unwavering as it meets his, the words he wants to speak are caught on his tongue, he didn’t know where to start, or what to say, “I’m glad you’re okay,” well that’s a fucking start.

“are you,” you rasp, “well at least one  of you is pleased with me, couldn’t help but to thoroughly disappoint Rumlow, when I didn’t put up much of a fight like you promised,”

At your confession Bucky’s brows are furrowing , lines deep in confusion, “what do you mean promised Rumlow, there was nothing promised, and surely not about you .”

A pained groan left your lips as you tried to adjust yourself on the bed, Bucky was moving forward but your voice stopped him in his tracks “I’m fine,”

“You’re not,” he tried.

“and whose fault is that,” you snapped

“I know whose fault it was y/n, you don’t think seeing you like this because I sent you out hasn’t been weighing on me?” he questioned, “here I was trying to prove to you that I’m not the monster you so deeply thought I was, that my father made me to be and look at what I’ve done, I went against the one thing your father asked of me,”

“but you said you didn’t know about it, about the letter” 

“and I didn’t,” he reassured, “but I still skimmed over that letter before throwing you from this house, your house, I tried so hard to prove to you that I wasn’t who you thought I was, but you just wouldn’t hear of it, you wouldn’t let me at least try and prove it to you, and so I let my emotions take the better side of me and I acted on impulse, on the rage that surged through me,” a sigh is leaving his lips as he thinks over his next words, “I can be a ruthless man y/n-”

“yeah no shit,” you grunted out, and Bucky had to bite his tongue.

“I can be a ruthless man, but I can be-”

“patient?” 

His hands came up to his head rubbing at his eyes, he couldn’t help but to glare at you, here he was trying to make up for his actions and you still had that mouth of yours as if you hadn’t nearly died.

“Oh, I’m sorry, ” you say looking at him, “ did you really think I would be understanding, forgiving, fall at your feet for letting me back into the home and having somebody help me to ensure I didn't die?”

“I didn’t-”

“You say you sent me out of here because your anger got the best of you , are you the only one allowed to act on  your emotions ?” you questioned, though you didn’t let him answer as you continued, “ I hadn’t even been here a week and I was accused of  being a liar, of  knowing about my father’s lifestyle,  a lifestyle that I was thrown into  and knew nothing of, I’m sorry if you expected me to remain calm,  be  a perfect doll and just accept the offers you were throwing at me, to just willingly let you “collect me” as a debt for whatever the hell my father owed you, how the hell would you have acted had you not seen your parents in years, come in a rush when you heard their passing only to find out all this shit, you can’t tell  me that if the roles were reversed that you wouldn’t haven’t done the same, if you don’t want to be this monster that you say you are, then leave me alone, let me leave, don’t collect any stupid debt that my dad owed you because he wasn’t worth it, he worked for the scum of this earth,” you paused head somewhat spinning from the hits you took earlier, and most likely the blood loss, “Steve believes your better than what you’ve showed me, so prove it to me, you want my forgiveness, that’s the only way ‘ll accept it,”

“I’m sorry y/n but I cannot let you leave, you have to realize that Rumlow is a threat, he has eyes on you now, Natasha risked herself to get you out of there,”

“but you can’t just-”

“and I’m not going to hold you here, but please think this through, he took you in my area, you really think he’s just going to stop, you got away , the job wasn’t finished, and they won’t stop until they’ve gotten the job done y/n,” he was trying to talk sense into you.

“so then I'll run, and I'll keep running,” you argued, you wouldn’t be held somewhere against you r will, you wouldn’t be a pawn in this twisted lifestyle.

Y ou could see his patience was running thin again, his jaw clenching, “like your father once said, I know I have no right to ask anything of you, but I’m asking you to really think about this, please don’t make a decision you’ll regret, you say that you’ll run, and keep running as long as it takes to get away, but you won’t escape this life by running, you escape it with your life.”

You weren’t really thinking when the next words spewed from your mouth, you were reacting in anger, hurt, and whatever other emotions had been buried within you, “then Rumlow should have finished the job, you should have let Natasha end it, I don’t want anything to do with this life, and that includes you,” you hissed.

Bucky's face was emotionless, the once there tick in his jaw, was now smoothed out, “of course, understood, well I hope you’ll heal quickly ; Natasha will check on you for the remainder of your recovery,”

Your brows furrowed, you went to question him but he was swiftly turning on his heel, the door shutting softly behind him.

“she’s really giving you a run for your money you know,” Natasha spoke up, Bucky turned his head to see her leaning against the door of the room she had entered, “I’ve never seen a woman tell you to so nicely “fuck off”

Bucky shrugged his shoulders, “I’m done Nat, if that’s what she wants then I’m done,”

Natasha’s brows furrowed, “but Rumlow, Buck, you can’t just-”

“I’m not going to Nat, she has my protection,” he sighed rubbing at his chin.

“how exactly do you plan on offering her protection and safety if she wants nothing to do with you, she’s not going to welcome your help willingly,”

“I have a plan and whether it works or not, well-” another sigh fell from his lips, “she has my protection whether she wants it or not,”

Natasha felt for her friend, “you know I’ve never seen you give up so easily,”

A tired smile pulled at the corner of his mouth, “guess I’m just tired,”

Natasha nodded her head in understanding, his words having a double meaning, “go relax Barnes, I'll watch her for the rest of the night,” she murmured, but resting would be the last thing Bucky would be doing.   


Bucky had worked into the early hours of the morning, Steve and Sam working with him as he texted them his plans throughout the night. There had been no suspicious signs of Rumlow or Pierce, but he knew it wouldn’t be long before shit hit the fan. He was rubbing at his tired eyes, as he finished the last of what needed to be done. Writing down his plan was one thing, getting the people to put together his plan and kick it into action would be another.

Bucky’s head was shooting up at the sound of soft knocks against the office doors, three sets of eyes stared back at him, “oh James you look like death,” 

A warm smile pulled at his lips, one he felt hadn’t been as genuine as it should have been, “well you’re a sight for sore eyes,”

A roll of her eyes as she moves towards him, “ever the charmer James, but my scolding will be no less menacing then the one I gave Steve this morning,”

Bucky is looking over her shoulder brow raised at Steve, “what,” Steve grunts, “it’s hard not to crack under the stare,”

“well  thanks' to you I’m about to find out,” he mutters eyes returning to  Peggy's “look I don’t know what Steve told you but don’t believe that punk,”

Peggy raised her brow at him unamused, “Steve didn’t tell me anything, it’s what you’re not telling me, so spill James Buchanan Barnes,” a pause, “now”

A rather loud sigh was spilling from his lips, as the words flowed from his mouth. He recounted the last few days to her as well as the plans that he had made with Steve and Sam throughout the night, Steve had been right about one thing, Peggy’s stare was something else.

After he had finished, recalling even the talk you and Bucky had shared last night, something Steve or Sam knew nothing about her features had morphed from one of anger to something close to sadness, “oh Bucky,” she murmured hands falling to his shoulder, “you need to stop doing this to yourself, you’re not your father, that man is not half the man that you are, and you know how I know” he looked to her with solemn eyes, “look at what you’re doing for this woman, your keeping your word even though she wants nothing to do with you, your father would have never done this for anyone, and you know that’s true,”

A sigh is leaving his lips, “I just want to make things right, I’ve been wanting to take Pierce and  Rumlow down for the longest time and I’m hoping that maybe this will be the time that I’m finally able to do it, I’m tired, tired of the chaos in this town, I’m tired of this front I have to put up, I’m just-”

Peggy’s hand rested on his cheek, “what your father left behind to you is a lot James, it’s okay to be tired, this empire your dad left you behind with is not easy especially with the enemies that he made during his time, but you’ve fixed things, and you will continue to fix the mess your father left behind in his wake, and you know we’ll be there right behind you, you don’t have to do this alone, we’re family,”

“so then you’ll help me?”

“you don’t even have to ask, and I'll help her come around as well, she just need’s time James, given time she’ll see that you’re not who she thinks you are,”

Peggy pulls one more smile from him before he’s looking to Sam and Steve who are by the door, “do you have the papers Sam?” hes questioning.

“got them all here boss,” he murmurs patting his case.

Bucky’s nodding his head, “great, you three can head upstairs if you’d like, the quicker I can get those papers filled out by her in agreement, the quicker I can get the other’s in to make the alterations to her house,”

“you got it, but Buck are you sure she’ll even agree to see us” Steve finds himself asking.

“it’s me she said she didn’t want to see, so I’ve got to respect that, she said nothing about anyone else, besides Natasha has been in and out of her room through the night and I didn’t her any form of disagreement,”

Though Steve did not agree that Bucky not be present during their talk with y/n, this was the man that he wishes you could see, and not the one you or he thinks he is, because he’s far from it.

The three climb the stairs, Nat greeting them just as she’s coming out of your room, “how is she  doing” Steve questions?

“Even though it’s very slight, she’s doing much better than she was last night, though from what she’s informed me she is still very sore, and disoriented, but Banner said that was to be expected,”

“well hopefully we won’t disorient her more,” Sam muttered patting his briefcase.

“well she should be kinder to you than she was Barnes, just don’t push her to hard,” Natasha advised as she pushed open the door for them.

You  looked up the second you hear the door creak open brows raising at seeing Sam, Steve, and a woman you had not met yet enter the room.

“hey y/n, how are you feeling,” Steve greets you softly.

“I’ve seen better days,” you murmured offering him a small smile, “to what do I owe the pleasure?” you questioned eyes going to Sam’s briefcase.

“we’re just here to get some signatures and to hand you over some paperwork,” Sam chimed in when he saw your eyes drift to his case.

Your mouth dropped open ready to protest but the women you had not yet been introduced to was speaking up, “it’s nothing bad y/n, Bucky’s just trying to fix some wrongs, he’s just trying to do right by you, and your family that’s all,”

“just hear Sam out, he’s going to explain everything to you, it’s really nothing bad, he really is trying to make amends here,” Steve added seeing the look of uncertainty on your features.

A soft ‘okay’ was spilling from your lips giving Sam the go ahead to draw closer to you. You watched as he pulled files from his briefcase, handing them to you, you looked over them, eyes fitting to Sam’s “is this?” you questioned.

Sam’s nodding his head, “Mr. Barnes is signing away all rights to you, the house is now yours, the house has been paid in full so there is no remaining balance of your dad that needs to be paid, all you have to do is sign some papers and the signing over of the residence fully to you will be complete,”

Your eyes flitted from the papers back to Sam, “why is he doing this?” you questioned.

“Though your father may have messed up his chances with Bucky, he’s also a man of his word, and your father has asked him to keep you safe, he’s giving you your childhood home so you won’t have to worry about returning back to a rundown apartment once you’ve healed, nor would you have to worry about being on the run from place to place to get away from Pierce and his men, he’s offering you security, someone would be present around the streets to make sure no suspicious  activities would be  occurring around you or the area, in no way is this a contract, or a way to collect any of your father’s debt, that has been paid in full,”

“why isn’t he here, shouldn’t he be present when you’re going over this with me?” you questioned.

A sigh leaves Sam’s lips, “as much as we all agree that Barnes should be  present, he has asked us to do this without him, he has also asked us to let you know that he is simply  respecting your wishes,”

You look to Steve then, “like we’ve said he’s trying to make things right, there is no catch to any of this he’s offering you safety, we all know what Pierce and his men are capable of, as I’m sure you are as well now, you can sign those papers without owing any of us anything,”

“and if I sign the papers and choose to leave?”

“no one will stop you,” is Steve’s reply, “if that is the case Detective Stark has been asked to escort you to  wherever you go to make sure you get there safely, and we don’t have another incident,”

Your eyes are fitting back down to the files in your hand, there is the tiniest part of you that feels horrible for your behavior to Bucky what with everything he is offering you, but you promised you would not be a pawn, you must remain strong, you don’t know if there is something more to this than what you’re being told.

“if I sign this right now and I choose to stay what is expected of me?” you still thought it was  too good to be true, in your mind there had to be a catch.

“There is no catch, once you sign this the house is  yours, all Mr. Barnes has asked is that you let the alterations that were to be done to this house be done,” Sam answered.

“will he be here during these alterations,” 

“no,” your head turned to Steve, “once again Bucky is respecting your wishes, you will not be seeing him at all, if you see any of us, it will be just to check in, but he will not be present at  any time ,”

You chewed on your bottom lip, guilt rearing its ugly head, “do any of you have a pen?”


	11. Penny For Your Thoughts

The sound of heavy machinery fills your ears, yours eyes watching the various men that  trail through out the front yard in  their yellow vests, heavy tools tied to their waist as the  cemented walls  slowly go up around you . Your  fingers drummed against the cup in your hand s ,  eyes slightly dazed as you look out over the lawn,  “penny for your thoughts,” comes a voice to your side,  your body jumps slightly at the unexpected voice the cool drink  sloshing over the cup and onto your hand.

“shit,” you murmur, sitting up straighter as you wipe your hands clean against the leg of your jeans.

Her warm chuckle fills your ears, “I’m sorry y/n, didn’t mean to startle you, just wanted to come see if you were okay,”

You look up offering her a warm smile, “m’fine just enjoying the morning,” you spoke as you moved over on the  bench you were perched to make room. Peggy took the spot next to you , “how have you been doing , have you been adjusting well ,” she questioned.

Were you doing well, you hadn’t really given it much thought, with everything going on around you.

If you were honest with yourself you hadn’t know n what to expect after you had signed those papers, each day that passed you were just waiting for the other shoe to fall. The thing is it never came, you hadn’t seen Bucky since that night you had spoken those rather harsh words to him, that was three weeks ago,  and  he had kept true to his wor d,  the only ones you had seen were Natasha, Steve , Dr. Banner and Peggy. Peggy had been a constant since the first day you met her, there hadn’t been a day in the past 3 weeks that she hadn’t spent a whole day with you , and for that you were grateful. There was a sense of normalcy in your life again, though you knew that was far from the case, the scars adorning your legs a reminder of that.

“I think as good as I could be given the situation, if I can be honest having you around has really helped me to feel like some part of my life is still normal,”

Peggy's hand patted your knee comfortingly careful of your now healed injuries, “I can’t imagine any of what you have been through is easy for you, but y/n you made the right decision, I’m not sure you believe Bucky to be anything but a notorious mob boss like your father, but I can assure you he’s much more than what you think, he just has a hard time showing it, he hasn’t been very open since she left,”

Your brows furrowed, “she?” you questioned.

A sigh left Peggy's lips, “I’m sorry, I’ve said too much, it really isn’t my story to tell, I hope you don’t mind,”

“that’s fine I understand, maybe one day I’ll hear of it,” you murmured offering her a small smile, your eyes flitting back to the men at work. A comfortable silence fell over the two of you, the sound of machinery filling the void.

“Her name was Dolores,” your head snaps to Peggy her eyes focused straight ahead, “she was Bucky’s first love and he had planned on making her his last,” her head turns to face you, “he was a beacon of light when she was around, she had brought out a change in him, that none of us knew he had in him, he wanted to do better for her, he even went against his father for her,”

“what, what happened to her?” you questioned voice low.

Peggy sighed eyes downcast, “she left,”

Your head cocks to the side, “she left,” you question, “why would she do that?”

“while Bucky’s father had still been around, there at the time had been a lot of tension rising between them and Pierce, so Bucky’s father decided to call a meeting between them and Pierces men, at the time we thought maybe they could talk this issue out, but,” she pauses, “His father was shot after their meeting, and so was Bucky,” a gasp fell from your lips, “unfortunately that was the end of the line for his father the shot critical, and Bucky was left with a reminder of that day,”

“why did she leave?”

“Bucky went through a lot of emotional trauma when he lost his father, none of us had seen him so broken, not since the passing of his mother, though nothing could have compared to when his sister was kicked from their home by their father, he was lost, and she didn’t know how to deal with the shell of a broken man,”

“what happened?” you questioned.

“she  seeked comfort in another man, and Bucky had no idea about her infidelity until a year into it, he had been so buried in his work trying to fight through his emotions, that he had no idea what she was doing when he wasn’t home he only found out about it when he caught them in their home,”

Your mouth parted slightly, “how could she do that to him, he was hurting, and she just” you were lost for words.

Peggy sighed, “that’s something Steve and I ask ourselves every day, once he discovered what she had been doing he had her leave the house, and what broke him more was that she left willingly her last words to him were “no one will ever love a broken man,”

Your heart ached in your chest, “what did Bucky do after her?”

“he threw up a wall, throwing himself into his work, while he had become a colder version of himself you could tell he was struggling, he hadn't been able to mourn his family properly, and now with the loss of Dolores, someone he believed was his one and only, it only caused him to spiral more, he struggles y/n, he struggles with the good and the bad, he so badly wants to go back to who he was when he was with Dolores, but he doesn’t know how to get back to it without being reminded of all the pain, being that part of him brought.

“why did you tell me all this, I thought it wasn’t your story to tell?” you questioned really looking at her.

“Bucky like many of us has been through difficult trials and tribulations, and I guess a part of me was hoping if you heard about the past that paved for the man he currently hides behind, you might try and see him in a different light, he’s not that cold man you met y/n, and he deeply regrets sending you out that evening,”

“well if the arrangement of flowers Steve brings me every evening when he comes to whisk you off your feet are anything to go by,”

A soft smile pulls at the corner of her mouth, though it doesn’t meet her eyes, “he really is sorry y/n, he was asked to protect you and he did the opposite of what was asked of him, he’s expressed that if he could go back and do everything over he would,”

“i would too,” you murmured, Peggy's head cocks in question, “why?”

“you’d be surprised, but I’ve had a lot to think about over these last three weeks, and apparently a lot to discover,”

“You don’t say,” she voices a teasing tone to her words.

You nudged your shoulder into hers, “I have,” you laughed, “and well,  I believe Bucky and I were both in the wrong,”

She’s raising a brow at you, “now y/n Bucky’s like family and I care for him , but how he went about things with you  I can understand why you reacted the way you did and if  you're asking me none of us expect you to be apologizing in anyway ,”

“I know I don’t owe anybody apology, but a weight has been sitting on my chest since that night,” a sigh leaves your lips, “I was harsh to him, and that isn’t who I am,”

“y/n you were grieving,” Peggy argued, “you were thrown into a world that you had been kept in the dark about most of your life, I would never have expected you to be all rainbows and butterflies towards any of the guys, not even Steve,”

“but he didn’t deserve my words, he was trying to keep me safe from the beginning and that’s because he had no idea the note my father left for him existed, he had been trying from the very first day to be kind with me and offer me a safe place, and I just,”

“you just what?” Peggy questioned, “reacted like any sane human?”

A puff of air was leaving your lips, “all I’m trying to say is that he’s not the only one that’s sorry, I judged a man I didn’t know, not that I know much of him to begin with,” you murmured, “I guess its fair though because I too was judged, from what you and Steve have shared with me he’s misunderstood, he's trying to be who his father was, while trying to fight that kindness he had with Dolores,”

“can I ask where all this came from,” she questioned, and you raised a brow at her, “feeling sorry,” she added.

“he gave me my home back, he’s giving me extra security so that I am safe from Pierce and his men, he has his closest family coming daily to check on me and spend time with me, he didn’t need to do all of this, he could have been the monster I kept calling him and still set me out on my ass, or at least left the house as it was, but he didn’t and he said it’s because he owed my father that much,” you scoffed “he doesn’t owe that man shit,”

The back of her hands comes to your head, “you feeling feverish?” she questions a teasing tone in her voice.

You swat at her hand slightly, laughter falling from both your lips, “I’m glad you signed those papers that day,” she spoke voice dropping slightly, “it’s been nice to have someone to spend time with while Steve’s away, you too have given me a sense of normalcy,”

“Life does feel normal when your mind doesn’t drift to the reality of what it really is, I think the only thing I need now is a job, I miss keeping busy, there’s only so much I can do to fix this house,”

“I can put in a word with my boss if you’d like, I have a lot on my plate and have been begging to add an extra hand, it would keep you busy, trust me,”

You look over to her with wide eyes, “you would do that for me?”

Her laughter rings through the air, “it’s been three weeks y/n, you’re a good friend of mine now, and you might not know this but I do things for those closest to me,”

“I have an idea,” you grinned.

“come on let’s head inside, I’m sure there’s plenty for us to do, we can leave the men out here to work,” she’s leaning in then voice dropping to a whisper, “besides there’s one who has been eyeing you this entire time, it’s kind of creepy,”

Your brows furrowed in confusion, but when you looked across the land there was a worker standing by the half-completed structure, his eyes were intently focused on you and Peggy, stood out like a sore thumb compared to the other workers working intently on the unfinished wall. You couldn’t help the shiver that rolled through you, “should I be worried?” you questioned eyes going back to Peggy's. Pushing herself to her feet, she reached for you, “probably just infatuated with your beauty, now come on, let’s get you inside,”

Taking a hold of her hand you let her pull you along, you turn your head once more once  you're through the threshold of your home, the man’s eyes still on yours even as the door shuts behind you. You can’t fight the feeling of dread that washes over you, your nerves frayed. While you’d like to voice your concern to Peggy you don’t think she’s the one you need to confide in.  So you let her keep you busy, letting her keep your mind from the man outside. The evening passes you and Peggy quickly, and before you know a soft rap is sounding against you door, Steve popping his head through not even a second later, “hey you two,” he smiles softly, definitely not the Steve you had first met, but you liked this side of him.

Peggy is standing eagerly from the couch, a bounce in her step as she makes her way over to him, “awe,” you coo your chin in hand, “aren’t you two just the sweetest,” and you don’t hold back the laugh that falls from your lips at the pink hue that coats Steve’s cheeks. “we have to go meet with Buck before we head home, I hope you don’t mind,” he murmurs though it’s loud enough for you to hear, the name  piquing your interest. You stand from the couch to see them out, but also needing to squeeze in a word with Steve, you need someone to voice your concern too, though you’re sure  it's nothing. You walk them to the door, Peggy turning to pull you into her arms, a look of surprise on your and Steve’s face, “if you need anything we’re just a call away, I hope you don’t mind but I've left a list of contacts on the desk in the office,” she pulls away from you grabbing your hands in hers before adding, “ I've left Bucky’s as well,”

You go to question it but she’s swinging the door open before you can get the words out, her feet carrying her out into the night, Steve turns to you, “she means well,” he chuckles, a laugh of your own spilling from your lips, “I know, uhm Steve there’s actually something I'd like to speak with you about,” he nods for you to continue.

“are the men working construction part of Bucky’s men, like does he know them well?”

Steve’s brows furrow at the question, “yeah, Bucky only hires those that he’s worked well with before, why what’s wrong,”

A sigh leaves your lips as you debate on telling him your concern, “it’s nothing, I guess Peggy was right, I'm just feeling paranoid is all,”

Steve’s hand falls to your shoulder, “y/n if something is bothering you, and you’re worried about it you need to tell me, I'm here for you,”

You worry at your bottom lip, “it’s just while Peggy and I were outside she told me that one of the workers had been looking back at me almost the entire time we were outside, and when I looked he was, it just gave me a really ugly feeling,” 

“when I bring Peggy  by, I'll hang around for a bit see if anything suspicious arises,”

A smile pulls at your lips, “thank you Steve, for everything really, it means a lot to me,”

“it’s not all me y/n, Bucky has asked us to keep you safe, we’re just running with the  boss's orders,” he grins.

Before you can stop yourself, the words are slipping from your mouth, “how is he?”

“Peggy’s rubbed off on you I see,” he teases, you shake your head smile growing wider, “ I'm being serious Rogers, is he okay?”

“he’s fine, we’re all working on figuring out Pierce’s next move,  it's been  real quiet on his side, and it isn’t like him to not be causing  chaos every other day, so right now we’re just keeping an ear out,”

He  sees the conflict and worry in your eyes, “we’re going to take care of them y/n, this has been a long time coming, Bucky’s not going to rest till he makes sure, they’re run from this city,”

“well I hope for all of us it’s soon, I’m tired of living in constant fear,”

Steve lays a comforting hand on your shoulder, “it’ll all be over before you know it, for now try not to worry, we’ve got everything under control, and remember Peggy left you our contacts if you ever notice something yourself don’t hesitate to call, we’ll answer,”

“I really can’t thank you guys enough,  everything you’re doing for me, I’m sorry If I was ever hard to deal with since the beginning,”

Steve laughed, “you acted the way any sane person would,” you’re laughing then, “Peggy’s rubbed off on you I see,” you teased throwing back his words at him.

His brows furrow in confusion but before he can question you Peggy is running up the steps a wide smile  on her face, and an arrangement of flowers in her hand, “Steve forgot to get these down for you,” her grin growing wider as she passes them to you, “there’s a little note tucked in there as well,”

You  look from the arrangement, to  Peggy , then to Steve, “I’m running out of vases Steve,” you laugh taking them from her hands.

“should I tell him to start putting them in vases  beforehand ?” he questions a teasing glint in his eyes.

Your shaking your head, a smile pulling at your lips, “no but you can tell him he’s forgiven, it’s been three weeks, the office is nearly covered in arrangements,”

Steve mouth falls open in what you’re guessing is shock, “y/n are you sure, you d-”

“I’m sure Steve, like I told  Peggy I’ve had a lot of time to think and a lot to discover, I want my life to feel somewhat normal again,”

Steve’s nodding his head in understanding, “will you also let him know I’m sorry too,” you added, now that took both Peggy and Steve by surprise, “y/n, what?” he’s questioning.

“I know how Bucky went about things was not right, what any of you did wasn’t, but I judged him based off what three days, I was harsh to him, and I didn’t take his shit, but he also didn’t deserve to be called a monster, he’s not my father, nor is he anything like Pierce or Rumlow, and I just want him to know I’m sorry I ever compared him to them, he’s done more for me in the course of three weeks then my father ever did in a lifetime, and he’s much kinder than Pierce and his goons”

Steve’s taken aback, and though  Peggy already knew your thought’s towards Bucky,  she's taken with your words as  well, she didn’t think you’d ask Steve to do this favor for you, “and tell him thank you for all this, he could have kept the house he gifted my father and thrown me out into the world, could have left it without any extra security measures, but he went above it,”

“Peggy really has rubbed off on you,” he murmurs an awe to his voice.

“I’m beginning to think that might be true, but it wasn’t just her, you both opened my eyes,”

Peggy can’t help but to pull you into another hug, even Steve wrapping his arms around you, a warmth filling your chest, and for the first time in three weeks you felt things might begin to look up regardless of what your reality was.

He’s entering the darkened, worn down building, the only source of light was the dimmed yellow bulbs as he walked further down the hall, he steps into the office, the back of his chair greeting him, “the gate is almost complete sir, when do you want us to move in, she’s grown closer to Roger’s wife as well sir, she’s there all day till Roger’s comes for her,”

“and when is that,” comes the sinister voice,

“she’ alone by 8,” is his reply, the chair swivels, “get the men ready, we’ll pay her a visit tomorrow night, she’s not getting away this time,”


	12. Break Through

He held his head in his hands, rubbing at the sleep in his eyes, he couldn’t sleep, not when there was so much on the line.

“I was gone what an hour,” he looked up through his hands, “you look like death himself,” Bucky can’t help himself when he crumples up one of the papers next to him into a ball throwing it towards his friend. He watches as it bounces off of Steve’s chest before its falling to the floor. “Seriously Buck you’ve been at it for weeks, you need to think about yourself, you need to get some rest, you’re no good to us in this state,” Steve speaks up concern lacing his features.

“I’ll get rest when we catch those bastards, you’re right it’s been weeks, but it’s been weeks since we’ve last heard anything about them, what the fuck could they be doing,” it’s more of a question to himself but his ears perk up when he hears Peggy hissing at Steve to “say something,” Bucky’s raising a brow then, “yeah Steve, say something,” he challenges.

Steves sighing glaring at Peggy who glares back, “well, what is it punk spill,”

“y/n said it was nothing but,” Bucky’s heart skips a beat in his chest at your name, he hadn’t heard, much less seen you in three weeks so it’s catches him by surprise when Steve is speaking your name.

“but what” he finds himself asking.

“how well do you know the contractors you hire?” Steve asks him completely disregarding Bucky’s question.

“they’re men I always hire for projects, I’ve never hired anyone aside from them, why?”

Steve’s running a hand down his face, “well y/n informed me that today while she and Peggy were outside enjoying the morning that Peggy told her there was a worker there that hadn’t taken his eyes off of her,”

“but I told her that he was probably just infatuated by her beauty,” Peggy throws in.

Bucky’s cocking his head to the side, “and what exactly did y/n say, did she not like the way he was looking at her?” he questioned.

“she said that it was probably her feeling paranoid, but that the feeling he gave her was an ugly feeling, it didn’t sit right with her,”

“Peggy did you get a good look at the man?” he’s asking turning to face his friend’s wife.

“not the best look, but he was very distant from the other worker’s he was very interested in the unfinished part of the fence, that’s the only thing I can recall of him that threw me off,”

Steve can see the uncertainty that crosses Bucky’s features, “you don’t think,” he’s asking.

Bucky shakes his head, a grunt of frustration falling from his lips, “we haven’t heard from Rumlow since that night Natasha brought us Y/n, who’s to say he didn’t send a rat in like we sent Nat,”

“how well do you know the men that you have to work for you?”

“well enough that I have files on all of them, no one is allowed to be placed in without a file, and Peggy knows this,”

A knowing smile pulls at Peggy’s lips, “actually about that, there’s something I need to ask you,” she pauses, both men looking at her to continue, “y/n brought up to me that she would like a job, and well, I’m sure you’re well aware that my job is not meant for one person, so I told her I would speak to my boss,” her eyes fall to Bucky, “is there any way you can offer her a job here with me, it would lighten a lot of my work load and that way I would have someone just like you have Steve,”

Bucky’s fingers are running through his hair, “peg,” he starts, but she already knows the words that are going to slip from his mouth, “Bucky she needs this, there’s only so much for her to do in that house to keep herself and her mind busy, she’s human Buck, she’s just as stressed, and paranoid as you, but she’s worse for wear because her life is literally on the line”

“did you even tell her what you did, who you worked for?” he’s questioning voice raised, “Peggy the minute she finds out it’s me you work for the thought of wanting to work will fly out the window,”

“Bu-”

“No peggy,” he growls cutting her off, “I’m going to respect her wishes,”

“but Bucky s-”

“ENOUGH!” Bucky hisses, “leave it alone Peggy, I understand the two of you have grown close, but what goes on between the two of you does not involve me, so I’m sorry but no, now drop it,”

Peggy glares at him a grunt slipping past her lips before she’s turning swiftly on her heel, Steve goes to call after her but she’s shouting back “I’ll be in the car, you talk to him, I’m done,”

Steve’s head falls, fingers rubbing at his eyes, he really did not get paid enough to put up with his best friend and his wife, “did you really have to do that Buck, could you not just for once, oh I don’t know let someone talk before you let your anger get the best of you?” Steve’s muttering sending him a cold glare.

“don’t start Steve I’m not in the mood,” he grumbles, and Steve’s just about had it, “Oh I’m sorry and you think it’s been a walk in the park for any of us, we are doing all that we can here Buck, and a little thank you every once in a while from you would be nice, you haven’t been the same since-”

“Don’t you dare,” he growls lowly advancing on Steve, “you don’t speak her name to me, you don’t bring her up ever!”

“No Barnes, look what she did to you, look at the man you’ve become, you’re trying to become your father aren’t you, your letting her words eat at you so bad that you’ve become the one person you said you never would,”

“Please Rogers, she was right I’m a broken man, look at me, look at what I’ve done,”

Steve growls in frustration, “you are not your actions Buck, that is not what makes you, you,” he grunts index finger poking at Bucky’s chest, “she’s forgiven you, you know, even asked me to let you know she was sorry, said there’s no more need to send her flowers”

Bucky’s face morphs to one of confusion, “what?”

Steve is rubbing at his eyes, he’s really had enough of today, “y/n,” he murmurs, “she wanted me to let you know she’s forgiven you, and she was sorry, you didn’t deserve to be called a monster and she regrets ever comparing you to her father or Pierce and his goons, she said you’ve done more for her than her father ever did,”

Bucky’s lips part, “that’s why Peggy didn’t hesitate to ask you about the job, she thought that maybe with y/n forgiving you that she might not mind the job, all she wanted was to help y/n feel a little more normalcy, she has nothing left Buck, all she wants is a fresh start for her,”

Bucky is feeling like an absolute ass, he sighs shaking his head, why was he like this, “ah fuck I’m sorry Steve I shouldn’t have I wasn’t-”

“no you weren’t thinking, but you still went ahead and snapped, you snapped at someone who’s been nothing but help to you man, we all have, Dot messed you up real bad Bucky, and all we’ve been doing since she left is trying to pick up the pieces and you won’t let us,” Steve sighs, “I gotta go man, I need to get peggy home, we have an early morning,” he murmurs turning on his heel.

“wait,” he calls watching Steve stop in the hallway but not sparing him a glance, “are you still coming by tomorrow,” he finds himself questioning because he wouldn’t blame Steve if he didn’t, he was a downright ass to Peggy.

He’s shaking his head, and though expected Bucky’s heart still falls a little in his chest, he really messed up this time, “I promised y/n I would stay for a few hours in the morning to scope the area out for her, If you need me you can find me there, my phone won’t be on so feel free to drop by if you’ve decided you want to stop being an ass,”

Bucky winces at the word, he watches Steve retreat down the hall, the door slamming shut behind him, he had definitely done it. Emotions surges through Bucky as he rushes to his desk throwing files left and right, why couldn’t he just do one thing right, why did he have to do this to himself. He knew he wasn’t like his father, he knew deep down that he was better than all this, peggy had been right about one thing, he didn’t know how to get back to that person he was when he was with Dot, he didn’t know how to be himself without her, she had been his whole world, and when she left she took a huge part of who he was with her.

Bucky knew he didn’t deserve her, her actions had been enough to tell him what he needed to know, so then why couldn’t he work past that wall. A heavy sigh was falling from his lips, chest heaving as he looked at the room now in disarray. He shook his head at his behavior, he knew he needed to do better, just like he did with you, he was going to fix the mess he had made, and he would do so, he could only hope they would hear him out, it would be a long time coming.

Moving to the entryway his hands flicked off the lights, the room left in chaos as tired feet led him to his bedroom.

As promised Steve had shown up with Peggy, or rather Peggy had show up with a disgruntled Steve in tow, you supposed it was due to the early hour of the morning, the Sun barely breaching the morning sky. You had opened the door hair in tangles, a yawn escaping past your lips, you barely had a moment to argue the time Peggy simply pushing past you.

“Peggy why are you here so early,” you whined as she pulled you to the office, she doesn’t answer you as she leaves you and Steve in the doorway rounding the desk and it’s only then that you realize she has files in her hold.

“You know how you were feeling uncertain about that worker,” she questions, “yes but that doesn’t explain why you’re here so early,” you murmur, Peggy rolls her eyes, “pay attention y/n,” you grumble low in your breath.

“That man is a new hire, he’s barely been with them a week the thing is he didn’t submit his files like he told the contractors,” you raised a brow in confusion, “look Steve brought up a good point to Bucky yesterday about the possibility of that man being a rat, kind of like Natasha was,” peggys sighs at seeing the confusion still etched on your features, “what this means is that that man works for Rumlow, any man that gets hired by Bucky has to submit a file that goes through me, its been a week since he began working with them or so the contractors have told me,”

Suddenly you’re feeling much more awake, fear flooding your veins, murmurs of no are falling from your lips as you sway on your feet, “how, how did he get in, how,”. You can feel Steve’s arm go around you steadying you, Peggy’s rushing to your aid, “y/n sweetheart you need to calm down, I know this is probably the last thing you want to hear, but this is great news,” she reassures.

You’re looking at her with wide eyes, tears pooling, “how is this great news Peggy, that man has been watching me and this house for a week, he’s been watching you, Steve, everyone that has been in and out of this house he has been watching, what is he going to do with what he knows, Peggy my parents couldn’t escape from the clutches of Pierce, what makes you think I’m going too, he’s going to catch up to me,” you cried.

“He’s not going to do anything,” a deep voice rumbles from behind you, three heads are snapping to the doorway, “I told you I was going to keep you safe, and that was a promise y/n, my family and I have been working around the clock to ensure that they’re taken down and I personally won’t rest till that happens,” he’s looking between Steve and Peggy then, “I’m sorry it’s taken me so long, but I can’t thank you too enough for what you do for me tirelessly,” his eyes shift to Peggy, “and peg’s I’m sorry for being an absolute ass to you, if y/n wants the job, and doesn’t mind taking half of your workload, the job is hers,”

Your head is turning towards Peggy, “that’s your boss”

Peggy’s giving you a nervous grin, “surprise?” she questions.

Before you can think to give her a piece of your mind a thought is suddenly hitting you, “why are all of you here, if that man see’s you,” you voice pointing towards Bucky, “he’s more than likely to report it to Pierce or whoever the hell he’s working for if it isn’t your men,”

“Steve and I are here to scope the man out, I need to see what exactly he is doing on these premises, if he really is being fishy, I need to be prepared, we need to be prepared,”

Another shaky sigh is leaving your lips, you felt so helpless, you felt trapped, at this point you wanted Rumlow to get it over with. You had seen the fate of your parents through pictures, and you knew your fate would be the same, these men had no conscious.

“y/n you’re shaking like a leaf, you need to calm down,” 

Your eyes are snapping to Steve, “how can I calm down, how do you expect me to remain calm when I know what that man is capable of, I have a reminder of it every day Steve,” you grunted, “there are pictures of the last years of my parents, leading up to the very last day they were here on this earth, that man doesn’t quit you know it, I know it, everyone knows it,” Your breaths are coming out labored, the heavy weight on your chest crawling up your throat choking you, you felt trapped, like you couldn’t breathe.

You could hear the muffled words of Peggy’s voice calling out to you, her worried features appearing in front of you before they were disappearing in a haze of black.

You awoke to silence, the quiet murmur of rushed voices echoing around the room as your hazy mind came too, a nice change compared to the heavy machinery that usually bounced around your home. Your head was pounding as you sat up on the couch, a low groan leaving your lips. “y/n,” you turned your head to see Peggy rushing towards you, her hands immediately reaching for you, “I’m so glad you’re okay, you had us so worried,”

Your head tilted to the side a questioning glance on your features, “you’ve been out since almost 8 this morning, y/n,” your brows furrowed in confusion, “sweetheart its 8:30,” your eyes widened as you looked around to find the once brightening skies have now been covered in the night sky. “what the hell happened,” you murmured as you pushed yourself to your feet, only to have peggy push you back down onto the couch, “you had a bad panic attack y/n, you need to relax unless you want to go through that again,”

You both were looking to the entry of the kitchen as you heard feet approach you both Steve and Bucky appearing, “how are you feeling y/n,” Buck questions.

The words are barely leaving your lips when the first bullet is shattering through the front door of your home, a scream tears through your lips, Peggy pulling you down to the floor as a rapid fire runs through the front of your home.

Glass and wood are shattering and splintering around you as rapid gun fire rains down on the house, “Peggy, y/n,” Bucky shouts from where him and Steve are laying flat in the entrance of the kitchen, you need to go up, you need to go upstairs, get to the stairs,”

Your shaking your head, you and Peggy clinging to one another from where your pressed against the floor, “Y/n we have too, we need to get out of here,” tears are rolling down your face, you were in the line of fire, and it wasn’t ceasing, the shots deafening to your ears. You watch in horror as Bucky leans up crouching his way to the two of you, he’s grabbing for you as he shoves Peggy In Steve’s direction, his body shielding hers as they meet in the middle, “give me your hand y/n,” he grunts, “I’m going to keep you safe, I just need you to give me your hand,”.

You look up at him head shaking in fear, “Y/n look at me,” he’s calling out over the gunfire, god would it ever end, “I’m not going to let anything happen to you, I promise I will keep you safe, now please we need to move that door is going to fall,” 

Giving Bucky your hand he pulls you along the floor, toward the staircase, his body shielding yours much like Steve was to Peggy. The gunfire ceases suddenly once you reached the first step to the stairs, “go,” Bucky growls, “both of you get up there now!” Your scrambling up the stairs, head snapping when you hear the deafening crack of your front door being split in two. You reach for Peggy’s shaken form, your own wobbly legs pulling her along, her screams of Steve loud as you pull her further and further up the steps. The gunfire’s starts up again as you reach the top, a scream of terror leaving Peggy’s lips as she hears Bucky’s shout of Steve’s name. She’s reaching for the railing but you’re pulling her back, “Peggy come on we need to get somewhere safe,”

She’s shaking her head in distress as you have to physically pull her along, you find the string pulling down as the ladder descends towards you. You push her in front of you forcing her legs to move as you both climb the stairs, your frantic as you try to pull the stairs back up heavy gunfire still ringing heavily through the house, the stairs are stuck, a sob is falling from your lips, “fuck!” you yell Peggy looking at you wide eyed.

Your moving Peggy again then her form frozen in fear, you push her into a corner hiding her shaking form, she’s reaching for you the second she sees you move away from her, “I’m just going to get something just stay right there,” you whispered as you crawled along the floor, you had never prayed as hard as you did there in that moment that your fathered hadn’t moved it from his hiding spot. You searched for the creaky floor board, feeling it dip under your fingers as you pulled it up. Your heart hammered away in your chest as you pulled the object out, your reaching for the board again when you’re hearing Peggy’s deathly scream of your name, your eyes shoot up, a gunshot rings through the room, body thudding to the floor.

A shaky hand comes up to your mouth a choked sob falling from your lips, you hear steps racing up the stairs, the ladder creaking seconds later, your eyes widen again, the gunfire downstairs having ceased, your hand shoots up gun pointed towards the hole in the floor. Steve’s head Is popping through, he sees the gun pointed towards him, his hands go up he can see the distress in your face, “y/n its just me, lower the gun sweetheart” he murmurs as he pulls himself up. Your hand lowers, eyes blurry as tears make their way down you face, Peggy comes into sight as she rushes to Steve, her hands running over the bloodied spots on Steve’s shirt.

You faintly register the sound of the ladder creaking again but you can’t bring yourself to move, your body in shock, Bucky’s head pops through eyes wild as he lands on Steve and Peggy in the entrance of the attic, his eyes meet yours as he searches the room for you. You can hear him ask if Steve and Peggy are okay as he climbs in the rest of the way before he’s moving towards you with cautious steps. He kneels in front of you, “sweetheart, can you give me the gun?” he questions quietly. Another choked cry falls from your lips as you drop the weapon to the floor, Bucky kicking it away from you. Strong arms wrap themselves around you, as he pulls you into his chest, his head falling onto yours as the tears tear through your body, he holds you tighter to him, “it’s okay y/n, you’re okay sweetheart, it’s over now, he’s gone, he’s not going to hurt you anymore,” In your shakened mind you haven’t quiet registered the comforting words coming from him, through the oncoming sirens ringing through your now broken home.


	13. Safe With Me

Bucky held you close, hands running up and down your shivering form, your hands were wrapped around his back, fingers digging into the back of his shirt.  
“I shot him Bucky,” you murmured in disbelief, eyes wild as you clung to him tighter, “he was, he was going to hurt Peggy, and I shot him,” Bucky pulled you in closer, lips pressing to the side of your hair, “you saved Peggy’s life doll, that’s all, you did nothing wrong, you’re going to be okay,” he tried to offer you reassuring words, but he also knew the horrors that being In this life could put you through. You were shaking your head wildly, eyes meeting his as you pulled yourself away from him, “I shot him Bucky, I'm going to get in trouble, Pierce is going to want my head, I'm not, I'm-”  
Bucky’s hands reached for you face, thumbs rubbing away at the tears heavily rolling down your cheeks, “You did nothing wrong, no one, and I mean no one is going to hurt you or do anything to you, you acted to protect yourself and Peggy, nobody is going to blame you,” your breath hitched in your throat as his eyes grew stormy, “I don’t know how many more times I need to tell you that I'm going to protect you at all costs for it to really get through to you, but I promise, I won’t let any harm come to you, your family now y/n,”  
“but the cops, they’re downstairs, they’re,” Bucky was shaking his head, “you are my main concern right now, that is why I sent Steve and Peggy downstairs, when I see that you’re okay to move, me and you will go down the ladder, once we’re down I want you to go straight to your room and you relax, laydown, breath, do whatever you need to do to come down, I will take care of everything,” he reassures, and I don’t want you leaving that room until I come get you, you understand.” Your head moves against his hands, though he can see the uncertainty laying there in your eyes, a soft sigh falls from his lips, “you might not believe it, but you did good y/n, you not only acted to protect yourself, but Peggy as well, we both know what Rumlow was going to do y/n, he wouldn’t have rested till he finished the job,”  
Tears were pulling at your eyes once more, “but Pierce,” you whispered, “Pierce is going to find out what happened and he’ll find a way to finish it, look at what he did to my parents, he made sure the job was done,”  
“and when that time comes we’ll be prepared,” there he was with that reassuring tone, “right now we need to take it a day at a time, none of his men survived, we made sure of that, so by the time word makes its way to him, we will hopefully be a step ahead,”  
A weight sits heavy on your chest, the memories of what you were awake for replaying in your mind, the sound of the gun going off ringing in your ears. You can feel yourself slowly slipping again, the only thing keeping you grounded is his hands on your face, his lips moving, telling you to “breathe” for him, but how could you when your head was underwater. A knock on the wood under you has your eyes snapping to the hole in the floor, Peggy’s head popped through, she’s giving you both a small smile, “Detective Stark want’s to speak with you,” Bucky’s nodding his head, “to the both of you,” she adds quietly, and you can feel your heart beating wildly in your chest.  
“Let him know we’ll be down shortly Peg,”  
Bucky’s calling your name, though you can barely make it out through the ‘thump’ of your heart beating heavily in your ears, “Y/n, I need you to focus on me,” he murmurs hands reaching for yours, placing them against his chest, “breathe with me sweetheart.”  
Your fingers tingle from where they lay against his chest, his heart beating steadily just beneath the tips of your fingers. “That’s it, keep breathing,” you weren’t sure how many minutes had passed the two of you as you focused on your breathing, your hands thrumming from where they lay on his chest, his hands laying over yours. Bucky keeps his eyes on you, hands keeping you grounded to him, “we have to go down now, you think you can get up for me sweetheart?” you gave him a shaky nod, hands remaining in his as he pulled you up. His hands found their way to your face once more, eyes boring into yours, your breath catches in your throat, “I’m going to be right by your side, if you don’t feel comfortable saying something you just tell me, and I'll cut it okay, you don’t have to say or do anything you don’t want to, especially with Tony,”  
A shake of your head is all he needs from you before he’s pulling you along, he looks over his shoulder once you reach the opening in the floor, “we’re going down together, you’re shaking way too much, for me to let you go down alone,”  
“Bucky that ladder will not hold the two of us,” a grin is pulling at his lips, your heart skips a beat, the feeling surprising you. “Good thing we won't be standing on the same step,” your brows furrow in confusion, “I’m going to be one step below you doll, just going to make sure you don’t miss a step and slip down the rest of the way.”  
Bucky’s moving away from you his body crouching as he descends the first step, body pausing at the second, only half his body visible to you now. “You ready?” he questions hand outstretched towards you, and it’s only then that your mind drifts, your cheeks take on a pink hue. “y/n what is it,” he questions, “you okay” he adds noticing your hesitant demeanor.   
A hand comes up to rub at the back of your neck, “Bucky just go down all the way if I do fall you can just catch me,”  
Confusion falls over his face, “y/n wh-” his words fall short, a low chuckle falls from his lips, turning into a hearty laughter, “sweetheart, are you worried at having your backside in my face,” he smirks eyes twinkling even in the darkened attic.  
A groan falls from your lips, hands coming to your face to shield your flaming cheeks, “stop laughing,” you murmur, laughter falling from your lips as well.  
“okay, okay,” he laughs, “still not letting you come down alone, but what if you come down facing me?”  
“I’ll definitely fall then,” you argue voice coming out shrill, “it’s not that bad falling for me,” he grins throwing you a wink.  
Your lips part, and Bucky’s laughing again, “sorry sweetheart, just trying to lighten the mood,” and if it hadn’t been for him saying that, you wouldn’t have remembered why you were leaving the safety of the attic in the first place, he really was just trying to keep you and your mind occupied.  
“Bucky, I don’t know,” you mumbled looking at his still outstretched hand, “trust me than,” is his response, "give me that at least.”  
“Bu-”  
“Please y/n, trust me, let me make sure you don’t fall, at least not right away,” you raise a brow at his words not quite catching on right away, but the gleam in his eyes have his name falling from your lips in a groan, “James, who knew me accepting your apology, and a near death experience would have you acting so bold,”  
He’s laughing grasping your hand in his as you give in, “looks who’s the bold one now,”  
Your kneeling, putting a foot down on the first step your other following, “I swear if we fall, because you want to be a hero, this will be the last time I fall for you,”  
A smile is pulling at his lips as he takes another step down, letting your bottom half slip down further. Its only when you’re no longer able to use the stability of the attic to help you down that your become nervous.  
“Uh, Bucky what exactly am I meant to hold onto, I can’t grip the opening anymore without the possibility of throwing us off,”   
“there’s three more steps, just grab onto my shoulders and lean against the ladder, I got you,” he hadn’t let you fall yet, so surely he wouldn’t let you go with just three more steps. It took one step; the last step and your foot was getting caught on the one above it sending you stumbling into his arms. Not expecting your weight to crash into him, the two of you stumbled back, his back crashing into the wall.   
“well you didn’t fall for me per say but I did catch you,” the grin falls from his face, seeing your go deathly pale, he follows your unmoving eyes. For a second Bucky had managed to make your forget, to actually bring you back into a somewhat good headspace, but now that you were able to see all the damage done to your home from the tops of your stairs it hit you like a car crash, the feeling completely blindsiding you.  
Your head snapped behind you where Rumlow should have fallen, but all that was left behind was smeared blood that had pooled slightly on the floor, your knees caved, Bucky catching you as you fell.  
“shit,” he murmured as your body once again began to shake in his hands, “y/n, sweetheart I need you to look at me,” he’s placing your hands on his chest, “I need you to breathe with me, just like we did in the attic, can you do that for me?” tears are flooding your eyes, your breath coming out in short spurts, your shaking your head.  
It wasn’t the state of your house, but the smeared blood on the floor that sent your head spinning, your mouth was opening and closing choked sobs falling through your lips where there should have been words. “Breathe, y/n, breathe sweetheart,” he felt so helpless watching you struggle to ground yourself, “Steve, Peggy, I need you, now!”  
“B-b-bucky" you choke out, “there’s, there’s b-blood,” you whine, your voice cutting off as another sob tears through your body.  
“y/n, remember what I said, it isn’t your fault, you didn’t do anything bad, you aren’t a bad person,” he hushed hand leaving yours to cup your wet cheek.  
He turns his head to hear pairs of feet rushing up the stairs, Steve, Peggy and Tony in tow, Steve stops at the sight of you, Peggy nearly running into his back at his abrupt stop at the top of the stairs. Peggy’s eyes fall on your shaken form her feet pushing her past Steve’s frozen form, she’s dropping to her knees beside Bucky, “Steve, Tony, go pull the covers off one of the beds and cover that spot,” she speaks calmly, not wanting to get you riled up any further.  
“Peggy stay with her I'm going to go help the guys,” and you can see him give her a look but you can’t bring yourself to question it much less form the words while you're trying to regulate your breathing. You want to reach out, you don’t want him to go, but you don’t know how to ask him to stay, to help you catch a breath. Bucky can see the minute you falter once he pulls away, “I'll be right back y/n, Peggy’s going to guide you, I need you to relax, I'll be right back,” he assures you, thumb running over the tops of your cheek.  
Peggy fills your line of sight, a warm smile on her face as she grasps your hands tightly in hers, “breathe with me, y/n, just follow my breathing,” and you do, or at least you try to.  
In the other room Bucky finds Steve and Tony, “what the hell happened Barnes, what damage did you inflict on the girl now,” Tony’s hissing.  
Bucky’s striding up to Stark, murder in his eyes, “I didn’t do anything to her, it's what she did to save not only herself but a friends life that has her in that state,” Tony’s scoffing, actually scoffing and its taking all of him to not rub that dirty smirk off his face.  
“please Barnes, you think three weeks is enough to get you forgiven for all you’ve done to that poor girl, you really think signing over her house, HERS, is enough to have her wanting to be your friend, look at what happened just now to her home because of you, this is beyond repair Barnes, what’s your next move hmm, you going to send her out again, let Pierce pick her up off the streets this time so he can actually finish the j-”  
“stop it!”  
Three eyes snap to your enraged form, Peggy has your right hand pulled back most likely in her attempts to stop you. Your breath is coming out in short puffs, your face no longer carrying a look of anguish, instead there is pure rage. “you know detective Stark, I’m beginning to think you don’t think before you speak,” you hiss, “what happened here, is not his fault,” you growled, “there was weeks of radio silence from those bastards none of us knew till it was too late, we only barely realized Pierce had sent in a mole yesterday, and you want to blame him for what happened?” you scoffed, “with all due respect detective Stark you’re blaming the wrong man, blame pierce, blame Rumlow, but don’t you dare blame him,”  
“blink once if you’re in trouble”   
“Oh for fucks sake, enough,” you hissed  
Mouths are dropping open, Tony’s blinking, eyes in disbelief before he’s looking at Bucky, “what the hell have you done to her?” He accuses, “she’s spends three weeks in this house and look at her, what did y-”  
“I said enough,” you ground out, “James didn’t do anything to me, up until this morning that was the first I’ve seen of him in the three weeks that have passed since I first got back to this hell hole,” you sucked in a breath through your nose steeling yourself, “detective I have been thrown into a lifestyle I never knew existed, I only ever heard or seen these things in films, so you must forgive me for the person I’ve become over the course of three weeks, but when your life is being threatened after having lost your parents to the mob, having no family to turn to when life has literally gone sideways, and having no safe place to run to, I think you would be reacting the same,” you paused, it was time to face the music, “I killed a man trying to protect my friend, I pulled the trigger before he had the chance to place a single shot, nobody forced me to do that, James didn’t place a gun in my hand, and he didn’t squeeze the trigger either, everything that has happened detective stark is because I came home, my father told me that night to stay away, to never return, but the night that I received your phone call I went back on my father's promise and did the one thing he told me to never do, no matter what occurred, I came home,”  
You felt Peggy give your hand a reassuring squeeze, “if you want someone to blame, someone to take down, you can take me, what happened here was because of me, they, could have been hurt because of me, this was my fault,”   
Bucky went to argue, “don’t James,” you murmured hand raised, “you’ve done enough for me,” you paused, “you don’t need to do fix this either, I realized what I’ve done here tonight, and while I might not have seen it at first seeing Peggy kneeling in front of me made me realize that had I not acted how I did she may not have been here, so please detective Stark,” you added eyes moving over to his, “if you want someone to blame, blame anyone else but Barnes or his men, they’ve been nothing but helpful, kind, and welcoming to me,” Tony’s mouth closed eyes falling to the floor, “oh and detective,” his eyes shot up, “who I choose to forgive is my business at this point I have nothing left to lose, and you might think James is a monster like his father, but he’s not that man, he’s a far better man than any of those men, my father included. You sucked in a breath through your mouth, “If you have any further questions you can find me downstairs, I have to go find a place to stay for the night,”  
The room fell into silence as they watched you retreat, Peggy giving your hand one last squeeze before letting your hand fall away from hers. It's quite for a few more seconds before Tony’s breaking the silence, “I'm going to assume from the look of surprise on everyone's face that, that was not what you had planned,” Bucky’s shaking his head eyes still on the door you had just left through.  
“what are you going to do to her?” Steve questions.  
A sigh falls from his lips, fingers rubbing at his mouth, “nothing,” Bucky’s eyes snap to his, “what do you mean nothing?” because surely he couldn’t have heard Stark right,  
“exactly what I said Barnes,” he huffs, “besides I like her,” he adds, “she doesn’t take anybody’s shit well aside from Peggy, and of course Steve,”  
“Hey,” Steve grumbles, and Tony’s looking over the rim of his glasses at him, “Sorry buddy, but had you actually stayed on the force with us and not followed Bucky “till the end of the line” she probably wouldn’t have taken your shit then, man does she know how to dish it, I totally understand why you sent her out Barnes,”  
Bucky’s giving him that glare again, “you really don’t think before you speak, do you?” he finds himself questioning. Tony shrugs before he's moving away from them comforter forgotten, “I guess not,” he chides, “well gentleman,” he adds once he's by the door, “I'll see you all around,” he's out the door when he’s turning back to face Bucky, “oh and Barnes, I'd keep a close eye on your girl down there, once Pierce so much as catches wind about what happened here tonight, no one will be safe, especially not her,” Bucky rubs at his eyes, because he already knows the shit storm that awaits them once Pierce receives word that one of his most loyal has been killed, but he’s going to do all he can right now to prolong that moment.  
“what do you need us to do Buck?” comes Peggy's voice breaking him from his thoughts.  
“I need you two to go home and get some rest,” he mutters, “we’re going to have a long day ahead of us tomorrow.”  
“But what about y/n, she needs a place to stay, we can help her find someplace before we head home,” Steve replies.  
“don’t worry about that, I’m going to offer y/n a room with me, I’d feel better if I knew she was somewhere safe, and right now my home may be her only option while we wait to work things over tomorrow morning,”  
A knowing smile pulls at Peggy’s lips one that Steve catches but won’t acknowledge for the time being, because he knows his wife, but he also knows his best friend.  
“You sure you don’t want us to help you with anything before we go?” Peggy questions once more, though they all know the answer, and its proven with a shake of Bucky’s head.  
“Head home, I’m just going to get y/n and I'll be on my way as well,”  
Steve and Peggy offer Bucky one last farewell before they two are departing from the room leaving Bucky by himself. Bucky’s composing himself before he two is following the trail of the others, his feet leading him to you. He finds you slumped over the desk, head in your hands, “you find a place?” and Bucky’s kicking himself because what a stupid first question to ask.  
You look up a slowly, a tired smile on your face, “wasn’t actually looking, just needed to get out of there before I said anything else,”  
“so where are you going to stay?” he questions brow raised.  
You shrug your shoulder’s “was going to just lock myself away in one of the upstairs rooms,”  
Bucky chews at the inside of his cheek, why can’t he bring himself to say it, to ask you, he was so confident in his plan upstairs, why was it any different now?   
“you okay there Barnes, you look like your contemplating running for the hil-”  
“would you like to stay in one of my guest bedrooms,” he rushes out, and your mouth falls shut. Oh fuck, he fucked up, maybe he could just offer you a place at Steve and Peggy’s house, he could just text them a change of plans, he could just t-  
“are you sure?” your questions cuts off the banter in his mind, “I wouldn’t want to intrude, I was being honest with what I said earlier Bucky, you have done a lot for me, I don’t want to add to it,”  
A hint of a smile tugs at the corner of his lips, “It wouldn’t be a problem at all, if anything it might help me to sleep at night If I know you are somewhere safe, besides,” he adds, “you start work bright and early tomorrow morning,”  
Your brows furrow in confusion, he chuckles, hand rubbing at the back of his neck, “remember Peggy offered you a job?” Your mouth drops into an ‘o’ shape, “the offer is still there, just know this drives you in deeper,”  
And for the first time, a genuine tired smile tugs at the corner of your lips, “like I said I have nothing left to lose, might as well gain some friends out of it,”  
A chuckle falls from Bucky’s lips, his hand stretches out towards you, “shall we?”


	14. The Man I Am Is Not The Man I Was

You woke from a restless sleep, glimpses of the glowing radiant sun peeking through the drawn curtains covering the window. The warm inviting rays flowed through the open crevice falling onto your skin, warmth kissing at your body. Fatigue still rested heavily on your mind, the events of yesterday replaying like an old rewound movie, it seems you had not dreamt of it enough last night. Removing the silk sheets from your body you swung your feet from the bed, your toes digging into the carpeted feet below you. You stood from the bed toes curling, back arching as you stretched out the last bit of  unwelcomed sleep. A puff of air left your lips as you looked for the bags that Bucky had helped bring in for you last night. You had been surprised to say the least when you pulled up to his estate, a fortress resting on a grand lot stared back at you through the window of his black sedan. Tall gates had secured you in a welcoming safety greeting you as you exited the car doors cautiously, one eye over your shoulder as you looked behind you.

“You’re safe here y/n,” Bucky had murmured watching you with amused eyes every second that you turned to look back.

“I don’t doubt that,” you murmured in amazement, “was this your fathers?” you had asked as he led you in through the tall, wide double doors.

He stopped in the foyer, his tired eyes falling to yours, a smirk pulling at the side of his lips, “this is mine,”

Your lips parted, a chuckle fell from his lips, “come on let’s get you to a room, I can show you around tomorrow, you look like you’re about ready to fall over,” 

“you have no idea,”

With the comfort the room had provided you, you had been certain you would sleep like a baby, but the nightmares that had plagued your dreams had left you gasping yourself awake in the early hours of the morning. Every time your eyes closed, the gunfire, Peggy's shaken form, and the blood stain were there to greet you, it was an endless nightmare. Even now there was  remnan t s of it still floating around in your thoughts , eerie sounds of the incident replaying in the back of  your mind. Shaking yourself from your stupor, you moved over to the bags Bucky had left neatly by the door, you grabbed ahold of the two bags bringing them back to the bed. Unzipping each you searched through them settling on something comfortable yet dressy, you were due to start your first work day, didn’t want to disappoint the boss. Moving over to the ensuite bathroom you worked quickly as you removed last night's clothes, for the new fresh ones you had pulled from your bag. It was when you were reaching for your discarded clothes that you found your breath catching in your throat. It was barely there, but it was still staring back at you, a smear of blood staining your once pristine white shirt.

A shaky breath left your lips as the shirt fell from your limp grip falling back to the floor with your discarded night shorts. Your eyes fell to your uneasy form in the mirror, you hadn’t thought of it since you brought it up in the attic with Bucky. You knew Pierce was bound to find out, or at the least begin to question where his number one henchman had gone off too, it wouldn’t be long before he realized what had conspired in your home. If it wasn’t Bucky sending you out onto the street Pierce waiting in the shadows to finish the job, it would be another one of his loyal men stepping up to bring you to your end. You tried to think of it in a positive light; you had saved Bucky’s family, saved Steve’s beloved but at what cost? You had known nothing of this life before now, now you were sassing notorious mob bosses and shooting the craziest henchman. Looking back at yourself in the mirror you didn’t recognize the person that stared back at you, there was darkness where there used to be light.

Gripping the granite counter, you steeled yourself, today was a new day, Rumlow was no longer a threat, you were safe from harm for now. You murmured the words under your breath, a silent pep talk, you would get through this, just like you had gotten through your 18 th year, as hard as that had been. Turning the knobs of the sink you ran your hands under the lukewarm water, patting your wet hands on your flustered face. Once you had calmed enough you emerged from the bathroom, feet carrying you out of the bedroom, and down the grand oak stairs. The home was fairly quiet, the only sounds that of the quiet chirp from the distant bird or two outside. Bucky’s home was lavish, the interior design similar to that of  those homes presented in magazines. You looked around from where you stood at the foot of the stairs not knowing in which direction to venture in first. Going off your gut feeling your feet carried you to the left, and much like you home there was a corridor for you to walk through, the difference in this one was there was a lightness to it, not the looming darkness that would wash over you when you walked through the one in your home. You came to a stop at the windowed french doors, an office stood inside, the room washed in the warmth of the morning sun, it was absolutely appealing.

“You looking for Barnes?”

You jumped in your skin, your head snapping to the voice that had sounded behind you, your hand came up to your racing heart, “you scared me Natasha, how are you so silent?” you questioned quiver to your voice as you attempted to calm you nerves.

“I’ve been trained,” she replied with a shrug, “now back to you, you looking for Barnes,”

“well yes, he said we would be having an early start this morning, and since I couldn’t sleep thought I would keep myself busy,”

Natasha hummed at your answer, “should of just slept in, I was called to come check on you and Barnes by Stark after he had informed me of what had conspired last night,” she paused, “I’m sorry you had to go through something like that, but it gets easier,” your eyebrows shot up in a surprised expression, a chuckle leaving the redheads lips. “Anyway, Barnes was in his office early this morning like usual dead on his feet, I decided to take matter into my own hands and send him off to get rest god knows he needs it,” she murmured.

“Does he really not rest?” you found yourself questioning.

Natasha shook her head with a sigh, “unfortunately no, and it's been like this since-”

“dot?” you finished for her; she raised a brow at you, “Peggy,” she questioned back, you nodded your head in answer.

“Figures,” she laughed, “but yes, I'm sure Peggy has told you enough about Dot, so I won’t go into detail, but since her departure, or rather her unfaithfulness, he has dedicated himself to this,” she gestures around you. “But today or rather after the night you guys went through I decided it was time for a day off, Steve is really shaken up and so is Peggy, so they need time with one another, and as for Barnes, he’s running on fumes it isn’t much longer before he crashes, so I'd rather he crash now, then while he's really needed,”

“you guys really are a close-knit family,” you voiced quietly, a small smile pulling at your lips.

“honestly some day’s it feels like we’re much closer than that, but what’s closest than a family,”

And for the first time since you started your conversation with Natasha you didn’t know how to reply, because you didn’t know what would be closer than a family, when you yourself hadn’t had much of a family to begin with. Natasha’s hand falls to your shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze, “you're stuck with us now y/n, you might not have had a family back then, but given time you’ll find your spot here with us, you’ve already found a place with Steve and Peggy, your well on you way,” she smiled.

You offered her a smile of your own before choosing the next words you wanted to share with her, “I don’t believe I've really thanked you for getting me out of there that night,” you began, “had it not been for you I’m sure I wouldn’t be standing here right now,” your eyes fell downcast before they were returning to hers, “thank you,” you murmured, “and I know there's nothing I could possibly do to amount to what you did for me, but if you ever need anything even if it’s just someone to talk to, I’d be happy to lend an ear.”

And for the first time in what seems like years Nat is completely caught off guard, not used to the kindness that had come from you, this life didn’t know kindness. Her eyes shift, her hand falling from your shoulder to grip your hand in hers, “you're on your way,” she murmured with a laugh, “now come, let me give you the grand tour, it may be awhile before Barnes emerges from his bedroom,”

Natasha had shown you almost every inch of the Barnes estate, except for what was past the back doors, she had informed you that it wasn’t hers to share, but she assured you that Bucky would likely show you  the wonders that laid out behind the back doors. You were both perched on the kitchen island talking quietly in the large room as if it was the early hours of the morning when really it was well into the evening, when a thought had hit you. “Is Bucky the only one that resides in this home?”

“for the most part yes, aside from the times that we are in and out of the house doing business once he gives us the go ahead to leave home, he is alone in this house,”

“it must be lonely,” you murmured as you thought to him being alone in such a large home.

“that’s why we try to stay as long as possible, even if there is nothing left for us to do, we always try and extend our stay, but Buck usually can pick up on our tactics and eventually sends us off,” 

“How long do you stay?” you questioned.

You watched as she looked down at the wrist on her watch, “I should actually be on my way, don’t want my husband growing worried,” she smiled as she pushed herself straight.

“does he also work in “the life” you questioned pulling a life from her.

“He does actually,” she answers, “you’ll meet him soon enough, not sure when Barnes will come out of the confines of his bedroom, but you can help yourself to anything in the kitchen I know I’ve kept you from having a decent meal,”

“I grabbed an apple while you were showing me around,” you argued.

Natasha raised a brow at you shaking her head, “one apple is not a meal y/n, make sure you make yourself something before going to bed, we don’t need any more scares from you,” she teased.

“Noted,” you replied as you walked with her to the front door, she turned to face you once she was out on the porch, “I’ll see the two of you bright and early tomorrow morning, hope you’re prepared to meet the rest of the family,”

You wanted to question her but she was already turning on her heel before you could get a word out. You wave her off one last time before your closing and locking the door behind you, “right,” your murmur as you look around the once again empty house, “I guess it’s time for dinner.”

Bucky awakes from a heavy slumber, his body aware of the coolness settling over him in the darkened room. He looks around the room, the only source of light that of the slit at the bottom of his door. The second thing to greet him is an aroma, he hasn’t smelled something so enticing, so mouthwatering, that it has him slipping from the bed. His feet guide him in the dark, hand falling to the cool handle of his door as he pulls it open bright light hitting him, and there’s that aroma again, tickling under his nose, guiding his feet. He stops just under the arc leading into the kitchen, his gaze falling on your back as you stir something in pot. Your humming a quiet tune under your breath from what he can pick up, he might not have known you that long, much less at all, but he thinks this is the happiest you’ve ever been. He intends to look away, to make himself known to you, but there is also something stopping him from doing so, something keeping his eyes on you as you move around his kitchen unaware of his presence. He likes this he thinks.

It’s when you go to fetch something from the island in front of him that you finally spot him in the entryway. For the second time that day you are jumping in your skin, a quiet gasp falling from your lips as you bring a hand up to your racing heart, “seriously what is it with you all being so quiet, first Peggy, then Natasha, now you?” your questioning breathily, “and don’t say its because your trained,” you added pointing  the spatula in your hand at him. He raises his hands, an amused smile tugging at his lips, “wasn’t going to, was leaning more towards its part of the job ” he replies with a shrug. The aroma is hitting him again, and he just has to find out what it is that is enticing him so. You watch as he moves towards where you stand his body drawing him closer to the stoves as he looks at  what you’ve got laid out in the pans.

“Spaghetti?” He questions as he looks at you over his shoulder.

Your beaming at him then, and it catches him by surprise enough so to have his breath catch in his throat, “ who doesn’t like pasta, besides figured you might be hungry , it’s done if you’d like to eat already,”

“Looks like I woke up just in time,” he grins.

Your perched on a stool in front of Bucky on the very same island you were with Natasha earlier, “sorry  I wasn’t able to show you around the home,” Bucky  speaks up. You pause around  forkful of spaghetti halfway to your mouth, “it’s no problem, Natasha actually showed me most of it, except for the wonders that lay behind the backdoors as she put it,”

“Wise choice on her end, she won’t make it quite as interesting as I will,” he teases .

“I’m shaking in anticipation,”  you grin shoveling the spaghetti into your mouth.

Bucky laughs, actually laughs and  you can’t help but to look at him as he takes a sip of his drink , “do mob bosses laugh?” and it’s a god awful question, but it’s out of your mouth before you can even stop yourself.

He’s choking around the li quid in his mouth, a fit of coughs falling from his lips mixed in with pained laughter, “I’m so sorry ,” you screech and Bucky can’t help but to laugh more at your embarrassment , “it’s fine, it’s fine,”  he chuckles laughter dying down, now finish eating so I can show you the wonders of the backyard,”

And he watches with more amusement at the gleam that appears in your eyes, fork scraping against your plate as you  shovel the rest of the noodles into your awaiting mouth.

“No wonder, Natasha had said it was not hers to share, it’s absolutely magnificent out here Bucky,”

He looks over at you a warm smile tugging at his lips the pale moonlight above you illuminating his features, “isn’t it, it’s the reason I purchased this home, it’s  where I’ve found I can escape to when I’ve had a bad day,”

His fingers run along the withered bench you two are perched upon.  Over the years the garden bench had been every hue a flower can be,  and now, as it made rainbow flakes upon the grass, it had never been more pretty .

“Will you tell me about yourself?” You found yourself questioning in the quietness of the 

gard en.

“What’s there to know y/n, I’m”

Your hand falls to his that lays on the bench , his eyes snap  to yours, “ don’t do that to yourself,” your words catch him by surprise, “your so much more than your father was, you have people that care about you immensely Bucky, and from what they’ve told me, the parts of you I’ve somewhat seen, you’re not a bad person.”

He’s shaking his head, “you don’t know me y/n, you don’t know what I’ve done, what I do, had you actually been in this lif e before now you might realize just who I really am, though I’m sure you’ve gotten a glimpse of it with-” Bucky can’t bring himself to speak the words .

“Your not your action Barnes, people do things they don’t really mean,  you say I don’t know you, but I want to know you, I want to know who you are .”

“I was 15 when I got introduced to the life, my father had woken me up early one  Saturday morning  and told me it was time, time I learned the ropes if I wanted to take over when the time came ,” he brings up a hand to rub at his chin, “at first it was interesting, fun even , to see what it was my father did, but it wasn’t till I saw the darker side of things that I began to question just who my father really was, he had no remorse, no guilt, no apprehension for what he would do,” he’s taking in a shaky breath , “the things he did outside of the house had never followed us home till the first night it did, and then every night like clockwork the unrecognizable side of him would come out, he took my mother away, sent my sister away and for a long time it was just me and him, I was alone , didn’t haven anyone aside from Steve ,” his jaw is clenching the air growing tense, “then I met Dot,” a sarcastic chuckle falls from his lips, she was my world,” he murmurs eyes finally meeting yours , “she brought me out of the dark funk my father had put me in because of this life, she was this ray of light I didn’t know I needed, she was always there to guide me, she helped me find myself, my voice within this life, my father had caught wind of the change in me and decided he needed to fix it,  he broke my spirit,” 

You don’t speak, waiting with baited breath for him to finish, “my sister was just 18 when he forced her from the house,  he didn’t let me say goodbye, didn’t let me at least get her somewhere safe, he just gave her the boot and slammed the door before I could even move to her shaking form, she was in a sense the last person I had to normalcy in this messed up life aside from Dot at the time , what he did that night sent me spiraling, I was the  perfect boy for my father, I was doing the dirty work same as he did no remorse, no guilt, no apprehension , but the second I was out of my fathers eye I retracted into myself so I kept myself busy with work I was no longer  able to bring out the man Dot brought out in me, and it only got worse when,” a breath, “when I caught her with one o ne of my own,”

You sucked in a breath of your own, Peggy hadn’t shared that much, “ that night she left, packed everything up and left with him, said she couldn’t be with the  shell  of a broken man, after her I threw myself into my work, became the man my father really wanted me to be, and then I lost him too, just like I lost everyone else, ”

“I’m so s-” you went to say but he was cutting you off, “and you know what was worse ,  tha t the night I sent you out I saw my father in me when he kicked Becca from our home, and I just can’t bring myself to let it go to forgive myself for it,”

Your heart broke in your chest for the man, because you were finally seeing what Peggy meant, he wasn’t a broken man by any means, he just really didn’t know how to get back to the part of himself he knew the most.

Your reaching for his hand again, because you knew right now he needed a friend, “you don’t have to forgive yourself because I have already forgive you ,”

“Y/n you can’t,” he argues and you can hear how broken he is and how badly  in that moment do  you want to go back to the Bucky that was laughing In the kitchen.

“That’s not your choice James, it’s mine, and I’ve already made it,”

“But why, how can you be so forgiving, look at what I’ve done,”

“ The only thing you did was kick me from a home, a home I couldn’t even call my own, I’ve spent t o o long living in anger at my parents and look at where that’s left me ,  life is too short for that,  yes there was a moment I was mad at you, furious with you and your men and your way of doing things, but you  did your best to fix things for me, to find a way to say your sorry if you will,”

He’s shaking his head but your reaching up a hand to grip at his chin, “you’re not a monster Bucky,  and you aren’t the shell of a broken man, you will find yourself again, and if you’d let me I’d like to help you in anyway I can think of it as a repayment for what my father owed you,”

“Y/n you don’t,”

“I wasn’t asking,” you smiled, “ you have your family Bucky and they’re forever, but you also need a friend,”

And he studies you, really looks at you because he can’t quite understand how you are the way you are. How can someone  who ran through the trial and tribulations you did still be so kind, so forgiving .

You remind him of the kinder things in life, and he wants to hold onto that. He’s leaning forward then your hand falling from his chin getting squished between your bodies as he wraps his arms around you.

It takes the both of you by surprise the embrace unexpected but Bucky couldn’t help himself it was like embracing Steve or Peggy , “thank you,” he whispered, the words causing a shiver to roll through you, but  you’d blame it on the  non-existent wind. He pulled awa y from you pushing himself to his feet as he extended a hand out to you, “let’s get you inside, you have an early day ahead of you tomorrow,”

Your taking his hand then, “you planning on sleeping the day away again?” you tease.

“Keep it up and I just might,” he chuckles as he pulls you along the colorful garden, “I don’t think you’d mind  fending yourself one more day,”

“  unless you want a mess in your kitchen Barnes I wouldn’t threaten me with a good time,”

He turns to you as you two come up to the back doors brow raised, “a good time for you is baking?”

You laugh, “you have no idea Barnes, a girl has had a lot of time in her hands,”

A comfortable silence falls around the two of you as he walks you up the stairway, taking you to the door of the room, “ thank you for tonight y/n,” he speaks up grabbing your attention,  “it’s been awhile since I’ve let that side of me out,  so thank you for that,”

A warm smile is tugging at your lips, “you can’t give me all the credit, that was you too,”

He nods really letting your words sink in, “sleep well tonight, and if you need anything I’ll be down in the study for sometime,  goodnight,”

Your pushing the door open, “goodnight Bucky, make sure to get some rest, you’re no good to your team tired,”

That night you sleep peacefully a dreamless sleep, and that night  Bucky realizes a change.


	15. I've Got You Under My Skin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m really going through it this week y’all and I’m so sorry my work and updates have suffered because of it. This is going to be a bit of a filler, I’ll have a better chapter coming out in the next couple of days. Like has really been taking a kick out of me, but i still hope the wholesomeness in this chapter will hold you for just a day till i get out the next update! Thank you for being patient and still enjoying what i put out. As always tag-lists are open to be added and or removed, thank you for reading.

  
The trees rustle gently in the morning breeze, the graphite sky begins to wake. Silvery wisps of clouds scatter across the wide expanse of sky, highlighted by pinks and golds that expand along the horizon.The sun finally rises filling the sky with the brightest tones of orange and white. It’s the start of a brand new day, another chance to fight, to live.

You laid sprawled out  on the silk sheets, feet  gliding through the velvet like material. It was still early but you were dreading the moment you would need to leave this bed, you wished to stay in this comfort for the rest of your days.

You were just adjusting yourself deeper into the sheets when soft knocks sounded at your door, sitting up a little straighter you beckoned the person on the other side of the door to ‘come in’. Peggy's head peeked through, a warm smile on her face, “ Goodmorning ,” she chirped as she pushed the rest of the way through, “you have a long first day ahead of you, should be a fun one though,” she added with a wink.

You raised a brow at her antics, “fun at work?” you questioned arms stretching high above your head, as you shook off the last remnants of sleep. Peggy walked around your room opening up curtains, “okay ,  maybe not going through the many files I have piled up, but it seems Bucky brought you onboard just in time to meet the others,” she replied cheerily clasping her hands together as she turned to face you.

“right,” you nodded “Natasha had mentioned something about meeting the rest of the family.”

Peggy was grinning ear to ear then, “you’re definitely in for a fun night, now come,” she said waving her hands around, “get dressed and meet me downstairs in the office, we have paperwork to get through before we can join in on the fun.”  Your  sliding from the bed when she’s peaking through again, “oh and I’d wear something comfortable y/n, you can dress up in your best tomorrow , tonight, is going to be a special one,” she said with a wink.

Peggy was out the door before you could question her, with a brow raised and a puff of air leaving your lips you were once more sorting through your clothes that lay in the suitcases you had brought with you, you wondered if you would be able to return to your thoroughly destroyed home, you also didn’t want to overstay or overstep your time here with Bucky.

Picking out an outfit you thought would work best for you described day, you were moving over to the ensuite bathroom to get dressed. You dressed quickly throwing your hair into a messy bun and applying a minimal amount of face makeup, you could take more time for tomorrow. Pleased with your appearance in the oval mirror, you deposited your clothes into hamper before making your way out of the room.

The house was fairly quiet, more so than it was yesterday as you descended down the stairs. Making your way down the corridor you spotted Peggy at the desk, her fingers working fairly quickly through the file in front of her. Peggy looked up at you fingers still flipping through the papers’ lips moving ever so subtly, she paused a smile pulling at her lips, “well look at you, I thought I told you not to dress up,” she teased. A smile pulled at the corner of your mouth, “am not,” you laughed with a roll of your eyes as you moved over to her, “now how can I be of service?”

You pulled up a chair next to her as she went over what was expected of you, it was fairly easy it really was just going through things that were later to be reported to Bucky. Plopping a stack in front of you, you got to work quickly going through the various files and their contents, it was slightly overwhelming some of the things you were coming across. “so how was your first night, did you sleep well?” Peggy questioned from your left. 

“Define well?” you replied with a small chuckle.

“You know what,” I mean she laughed, “did you get any sleep?”

A sigh left your lips as you continued to look over the current paper in your hand, placing it in its appropriate stack, “Aside from the nightmares that plagued me, I would say last night was a much better sleep then the first night, everything was just too fresh, and then the whole thing with Pierce and what will happen when he finds out I was just-”

Her hand fell to yours stopping your work, your eyes glanced towards her, “when and IF Pierce finds out that will be a battle of its own when we get to it, but for now, you can’t those thoughts haunt you, I assure you when Pierce finds out, we will be the first to know, he has his way of acknowledging things.”

You swallowed the knot in your throat, “I’m sure that was meant to make me feel better, but I think it’s done the opposite,” you muttered, placing the paper in your hand down as you sucked in a lungful of air.

“Oh y/n,” Peggy cooed sliding over to you, her hands going around you shoulder, head leaning against yours, “what you did that night was something any of us would have done, Steve and I are so grateful for what you did because if you hadn’t fired that shot, I would likely not be here and I know you know that,”

You turned your head to look at her your eyes watering, “I’m scared Peggy,” you whispered, “that night that Rumlow took me and what he did to me, I just, I-”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay y/n,” she murmured pulling you in close, “this life isn’t for everyone, and you might find it hard to believe but we have all been through those moments at one time or another, even I have, and I know what you’re going though, and while it might feel like the end of the world, I promise it does get better,” she spoke softly her hands running up and down your arm.

“you’ve been through something similar,” you sniffled.

She was shaking her head slowly, “unfortunately yes, it was when Steve and I had barely gotten together, things had gone sideways between Bucky’s men and Pierce’s and to show that he had the upper hand he took me, and I was grateful that Steve and Bucky were able to get to me before he could really inflict any horrible damage but after that I was confined to this office,”

“you used to work outside of this house?”

Peggy’s laughing then, her hands squeezing you tighter, “of course y/n, honestly if I had the option of being out there with them instead of doing all of Barnes paperwork, I would choose to be out there working the streets by Steve’s side like we used too,” she sighed it gets lonely just sitting here and hoping to god I don’t get a phone call that something has gone sideways, but now that you’re here, things have begun to look up already,”

“did my invite get lost in the mail?” both you and Peggy looked to the door, Natasha stood there in all her glory leaning against the entryway.

“are you sure Clint, didn’t hide it from you?” Peggy shot back a teasing smile pulling at her lips.

“he Is known to hide things, what a shame,” she shrugs but a smile still tugs at her lips.

“who’s Clint?” you find yourself questioning.

“That would be me.” comes a somewhat chipper voice, a spiky haired brunette peak out from Natasha’s side. Your raising a brow, “this is my husband y/n,” Natasha adds, your mouth drops into an ‘o’, “told you, you would be meeting him soon enough,” she grins.

Clint moves from her side striding over to you his hand extending towards you once he’s in distance, “Barton, it’s nice to meet you,” he greets shaking your hand firmly.

“It’s nice to meet you as well,” you reply offering him a warm smile.

“Natasha was right, you’re definitely going to fit in just fine,” your raising a brow at him, the same time Natasha is hissing his name.

“what?” he shrugs looking over to her, “she’s cool I can tell, and from what I hear she keeps Barnes in line,” he adds looking back over to you a smirk on his face.

Your hand comes up to your head the same time a groan falls from your lips, “I do not,” you argue, “I just I-”

Clint is laughing heartily then, “don’t worry I know, Natasha filled me in, it's pretty cool though, none of us are ever able to give Barnes a piece of our mind,” he’s leaning forward then voice dropping to a whisper , “you think we can write you letters on what we would like to voice about Barnes and you tell him how we feel for us?”

Laughter is falling from your lips, “you got it, just slide them under my door,” you wink.

“ I like her,” he voices to the room, “we’re keeping her,” he turns to Nat.

“I saw her first Barton,” Peggy argues, “sorry Peggy but that would have been me,” Natasha adds moving closer.

A warmth spreads through you as you watch the three interact, you might no t have know n them long enough, but they were quickly becoming important in your life. You hadn’t had this in so long that it was overwhelming not to get caught up so quick in the idea of having someone to call a friend, people to call family.

“ Sorry to burst the bubble here but I  saw her before any of you did.” The voice pulls you from your thoughts.

The bickering stops as Bucky enters the room, Steve in tow and an all too knowing smile o n his face.

“ Well then I’m sorry to burst your bubble Barnes, but tony has the one up on you,” you add a grin pulling at your lips.

Bucky’s eyes squint in mischief, “is that anyway to talk to your boss?”

Your bring your finger up to your chin,  “it’s how I usually talk when I state facts,” you shrug.

“Oh you have to let me take her out on patrols, ”  Clints speaking up, “she would be so much fun to drive around with !”

Bucky’s shaking his head a low chuckle falling from his lips, “within time I’ll allow it, or at least once these two finish all the paperwork .” He adds eyes.” He adds eyes flitting over to  you and Peggy, “you know I hired her because you said you needed an extra hand,” 

“Well maybe if we weren’t getting interrupted,” you bit back.

Bucky laughs, “anyways I need to speak with y/n” he speaks to the room,  “ so if you all could give us a minute ,”

There’s ever so silent agreements as Peggy slides away from you to join the others as they make their way from the room. Bucky  moves closer  sliding onto the desk , h is body facing yours, “how are you liking the job so far?”

“Paper work is a little overwhelming, don’t be surprised when I start questioning you about various files,” 

He’s shaking his head, “I would expect nothing less I assume you’ll talk my ear off like Peggy does ?” He questioned brow raised.

You lean forward a smile on your face, “I’ll do much worse,”

He’s laughing heartily then, “who would have thought , you know when I first met you I didn’t think we’d be here,”

You purse your lips, “I suppose certain events happen for a reason if you believe in all that, though if I can be honest I didn’t imagine  we’d be here either, say where were you and Steve this morning?”

He’s rubbing at the scruff on his chin, “we were actually at your place, the contractor that was working on your fence went to asses the damage,”

You held your breath, “and,”  you questioned “ what was the verdict?”

A sigh is leaving his lips, “this is why I needed to speak with you alone, we lost the contractor, after giving him the details he just said he couldn’t work on the house anymore, he didn’t so much as give a viable reason why , but our bets are on Pierce,”

Your brows furrowed in confusion but your heart pounded heavily in your chest, “ why Pierce?” though you already knew why.

“Pierce isn’t a pleasant man to come across, I’m sure you know that, some of the men I hire are not from my area,” a pause, “they’re from his, so if and when  he gets word about what went down he’ll  go to any extent to exact revenge,”

Your lips parted, heart plummeting to the depths of your stomach, “oh god, what have I done,” you murmured a shaky hand coming  up to your mouth.

Bucky’s slipping off the desk at your change in demeanor his body rounding the desk as he moves over to you, his hand s turning the chair your in to face him. His hands fall to your knees grounding you, “y/n  this isn’t a battle your going to fight alone,  there’s a lot of us that have  been hurt deeply by Pierce and I intend to take him down, he’s caused enough problems and left enough damage in his wake.”

“But Bucky what if one of those workers gets hurt, their family could get hurt because of me,”

“As far as Pierce is con sidered it was my doing,  I’m the one that took down Rumlow  but that doesn’t mean we keep our guard down with you, we will stay vigilant and I promise  we’re keeping you safe,”

“How am I going to return home, where am I supposed to stay,” you questioned face forlorn.

“ Steve and I had been discussing having you stay with me awhile longer, the upstairs could be your section as I have my bedroom down here, you wouldn’t have to see much of me aside from business,” he answered.

You looked at him in disbelief, “Bucky honestly I couldn’t, I’d be-”

“I wasn’t asking per say , y/n Pierce is still out there, he has other men, I’m not going to make the same mistake, as soon as this is all over you can return to your apartment if you’d like or we can find you a home here,”

Your mouth fell open, “really Bucky that is too much,” you argued, “you barely even know me and I wasn’t the kind-”

“ Neither was I,” he cut you off, “last night you asked me to let you help in anyway , now I’m asking the same of you

“ Neither was I,” he cut you off, “last night you asked me to let you help in anyway , now I’m asking the same of you , let me do this for you, for your parents, I was asked to keep you safe, let me keep my word, let me prove to myself I’m not the monster I continuously allow myself to believe I am, let me do this.”

And how could you say no, he was offering you something you knew you couldn’t bring yourself to pass. You weren’t ready to be reunited with your parents, you wanted to fight, you wanted to l ive , something you felt you hadn’t done in so long.

A breath was escaping your lips your eyes fixated on his, “ I’ll stay,” he’s straightening up, “but on one condition,” he raises his brow, “you let me help . - ”

His brow furrows, “you’re already going to help . ”

You shake your head, “let me help you take down Pierce, he took a big part of me Bucky, and I can’t just stand back and wait for you to take him down, I need to help in some way, I need to do this for my parents.”

Bucky understands where your coming from, your reasoning is the same  as his for needing to take Pierce down.

“As much as I would like to fight you on this one, I know there won’t be any fending you off, so I’ll let you help, but,” he adds pointing a finger at you, “the second I tell you you can’t help especially if it gets to dangerous I need you to not fight me on it, you got it?”

“I’ll try,” you muttered.

“Y/n,” he grounds out, “I need you to  promise me you won’t fight me on it.”

“Okay, okay,” you hold your hands up in surrender, “I’ll try,” you grin.

He rolls his eyes but gives you a smile anyway , “I really do think your father knew what he was doing when he  decided to sign you over.”

Your raising your brow at the statement, “oh , and why’s that.”

“I think he knew deep down how much of a fight you would put up, I also think he knew what was going to happen , what I didn’t think he knew was that you were going to need me as much as I needed you,”

Your breath is catching on your throat at his words .  Needed you? He needed you?

A tap of his hand against your knee jars you from your mind. You watch him stand, “come on, I think there some  people you need to meet,”

Your offering him a smile as you take his hand allowing him to pull you up, “this wouldn’t happen to be the crazy night Peggy told me about would it,”

“You’ll just have to find out y/n, you’ll just have to find out,” he grins as he leads you to the doors of the office. 

As soon as he has them open your being scooped away by Peggy who is yelling an apology over her shoulder as she whisks you off towards the others.

Steve aisles up next to him a cup in hand, “how’d she take the news?”

Bucky’s eyes remain on your form as he watches you interact with  his friends, his family, “she took it surprisingly well,” he turns to his friend then, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, “she’s going to give me a run for my money Steve, I just know it,”

Steve’s placing a hand on his shoulder, “I don’t doubt that,” he chuckles, “but I also know she’s going to be something good for you, she’s already  putting a change in you none of us had seen in a long while,”

“You think so?”

Steve offers him a warm smile, “I know so, and you’ll see give it a couple weeks and you’re going to see it too.”

Bucky’s eyes are flirting back over to you then and he can’t help but to hope that Steve’s right.


	16. Show Me Your Weaknesses

It’s been a month ;  a month of healing,  a month of growing, not only for you but for everyone around you. Some days had been harder than others , but you had friends you now called family to pull you out of the darkest days. Your darker days usually revolved around the unknown; the unknown being Alexander Pierce. He had been radio-silent the entire time, none of Bucky’s men, much less Bucky had heard of any disturbances on his end. It had Bucky on edge most days, but he was careful with how stressed the situation actually had him.

You were currently looking over a file, in the still ever-growing stack, “does this ever end?” you groaned rubbing at your tired eyes.

Peggy looked up, eyes glancing at you over the rim of her glasses, “wish I could tell you it did hun, why do you think I offered you the job, the pile would be much larger if it was just me.” she laughed.

“you’ve ultimately trapped me here, was this the plan all along?” you questioned.

Peggy swatted your shoulder with a file she had in hand, “Barnes has been rubbing off on you hasn’t he,” she laughed.

“I thought I was the one rubbing off on him?” you hummed with a smile.

Peggy squinted at you a smirk pulling at her lips, “you would like that wouldn’t you, to be rubbing off on him?” she teased.

Your mouth dropped open, “Peggy Carter!” you squealed, “it's not like that.” you hissed voice dropping, because it really wasn’t like that.

Laughter fell from her lips, “its Rogers sweetheart, and you and I both know thats a lie, it's been a month and you and Barnes are as close as ever.”

You squinted at her in mock anger though your heart was racing in your chest, “it really isn’t like that Peggy, we’ve become really good friends if anything, he's a great guy Pegs.”

“ uhuh I'm sure,” she smirked, “you know I've known him longer than you and I know that Barnes does not invite just anyone to dinner, nor does he buy flowers for just anyone.”

You threw the file down onto the table swiveling your chair to face Peggy fully, “Peggy firstly it was dinner with you and Steve, and the flowers he hasn’t stopped surprising me with them since the accident, he still feels he needs to apologize!”

She’s grinning as if she knows a secret, and its making you sweat, “Y/n I'm not talking about the dinner with Steve and I, I'm talking about this past week the time the two of you had dinner at his favorite Diner, the one where he gave you a beautiful boquet of flowers." 

Your heart plummets, “how did you?” you question, but then it comes to you, did she know, “did Steve spy on us?”

Peggy’s laughing again, “no Steve was at home with me but Bucky had brought it up in conversation the following day.” you begin to wonder what else Bucky might have told Steve about that evening.

A groan fell from your lips as you sunk into the chair, “it’s really not like that Peggy, he’s just been a really great friend, to great of one if you ask me,” you muttered voice dropping off at the end.

“if it’s not like that then how is it?” she questioned, “because if you ask Steve and I, Bucky isn’t the same person he was a month ago, and I am aware we don’t know you from before but if you ask me, you too are not the same person.”

And Peggy was right, you weren’t the same person than you were months ago, at least not the same girl who you were before you arrived back in town. You also knew that Bucky Barnes had a lot to do with the “new you”, he had helped you in many ways, just like you had helped him.

“so how is it?” Peggy questioned drawling out the words.

You weren’t even sure yourself, to you it was just too friends going out for burgers and milkshakes, but to the eye of a stranger and apparently you friends it was much more. Was it?

_ Bucky had given you the day off, well he had given Peggy and Steve the day off to spend the day with another. You on the other hand had nothing to do, and unlike Bucky you couldn’t bring yourself to spend the day locked away in your room when there was a quickly growing pile of files accumulating in Bucky’s office. _

_ So you had dressed in your comfiest clothes, fetched a cup of coffee, and ventured into the quiet office taking your spot and beginning to sort through the various files. A puff of air was leaving your lips as you grabbed the 30 _ _ th _ _ file that morning, a groan following when you opened the file to see the stack of contents waiting for you to sort through. _

_ “has listening always been an issue with you?” _

_ A grin sp _ _ l _ _ it your lips, “depends on the person  _ _ I’m _ _ supposed to be listening too.” _

_ Bucky shook his head kicking off the doorway, “is that so?” _

_ You placed the file down resting your head on your hands as you watched him walk over to you perching himself on the desk you were sat at, “it is so,” you replied, “you see I always listened to my parents, BUT I only listened because my mother always warned if I didn’t there would be no burgers and shakes for me.”  _

_ Bucky chuckled warmly, a warmth spreading through your chest at the sound, a warmth _ _ that _ __ __ _ had been making itself known more recently the more time you had spent in Bucky’s presence. _

_ “So is that all it takes to buy your compliance, a burger and shake?” he questioned. _

_ You leaned back in your chair, “it can’t just be any burger and shake place, it has to be from Bonnies Grill,” _

_ He’s leaning towards the desk then, eyes scanning you, “your ma didn’t ever happen to stumble upon my ma at one point you think?” he questioned. _

_ Your raising a brow, “why’s that?” _

_ “because you’re a girl after my  _ _ own heart _ _ that’s why.” _

_ His toothy smile has your heart stalling in your chest, get a damn grip y/n, this isn’t the first man to flirt with you!  _

_ Not wanting to be caught catching feelings you leaned forward again getting in his space, two could play this game, “you’ve caught me,” you purred, “I've always had a thing for mysterious mob bosses, couldn’t help myself especially with these long locks,” you murmured curling his hair around your finger, “and those precious baby blues, you could have any girl swooning with just a glance.” _

_ Bucky's pulling away then, loud, infectious, laughter spilling from his lips, “god doll, Peggy was right you really are a breath of fresh air.” _

_ There goes you _ _ r _ _ heart, there was just something about this man and his charm it was irresistible to someone like you. _

_ “I’m appalled you didn’t think I was a breath of fresh air _ _ before _ _ Barnes,  _ _ our  _ _ first introduction should have proven this,” you teased, “Peggy shouldn’t have to remind you.” _

_ Bucky shook his head, “if you would have told me we would have ended up friends the first day I met you I would have said you were lying,” _

_ You feigned a gasp your hand coming to rest at your chest, “James Buchanan Barnes, how dare you, our friendship is close second to Steve’s now, you take that back!” _

_ “You’re pretty  _ _ even _ _ with Steve doll, I see you every hour of every day now, with the occasion that I’m not out of the house.” _

_ “Not annoyed of me yet?” you questioned. _

_ “don’t think I could get annoyed of you, you keep me on my toes, like I said y/n you’re a breath of fresh air.” he voiced slipping off the desk. _

_ “where you going Barnes?” you couldn’t help but question his retreating form. _

_ He glanced at you over his shoulder, “I'll be back, won't be out too long, just need to go grab something, and stop working.” he called out over his shoulder, his figure disappearing. _

_ Soft laughter fell from your lips as you went back to the files in front of you, you would at least finish the file you had just started and then you would stop. _

_ “I thought I told you to stop working.” _

_ You look up from the file you were just finishing, “I was just finishing up the one I had opened before you interrupted me.”  _

_ “don’t touch another file, come on we’re going out.” _

_ You raised a brow, “where are we going?” you questioned. _

_ “you’ll find out when we get there, now come on, the cars running.” _

_ “Where’s it running to?” you questioned pushing off the chair leaving the files behind on the desk.  _

_ Bucky pushed at your shoulder, when you drew close enough, “stop being such a  _ _ smartass _ _ , and get in the car.” he chuckled. _

_ “am I even dressed enough to go to wherever it is you plan on taking me too?” you questioned following him out of the office, grabbing your slip ons on your way out the door. _

_ He’s pulling the passenger door open for you, “trust me what you’re wearing is fine,” he pauses almost as if he’s thinking over his next words carefully, “you look beautiful he murmurs,” and  _ _ it's _ _ enough to have a breath catching in your throat. _

_ You’re giving him a warm smile, the butterflies swarming in the depths of your  _ _ stomach, “ _ _ such a charmer Barnes, who knew you were such a flirt,” you grinned sliding into the seat.  _

_ His reply is a wink, with a heart stopping smile; he closes the door softly behind you, giving you a minute to compose yourself as he rounds the car to the  _ _ driver's _ _ side. _

_ “So, you going to tell me where we’re going?” you questioned once he was buckled in. _

_ He’s shaking his head as he puts the car into drive, eyes focused on the sights ahead, “ _ _ it's _ _ a surprise, plus it’s a day off, you should be enjoying your day off not doing more work, you’ll like where we’re going though, trust me.” _

_ You don’t question him as he drives down the streets of New York streets you hadn’t seen much of since the last time you drove them with your mother, it was captivating to see them once more, it almost felt freeing to be out on these parts. _

_ A wide grin pulled at your lips as you saw the sign draw closer, streets becoming more familiar the closer you got. Bucky pulled up to a parking spot shutting off the car, he turned to look at you, “you little sneak, you’re trying to get me to listen to you, aren’t you?” you grinned. _

_ He shrugged his shoulders a smirk pulling at his lips, “not necessarily, like I said it's our day off, and you haven't been out since, well you know,” he replied referring to the incident, “ just thought we could indulge in something that both of us enjoyed when we were smaller,  _ _ Steve _ _ and  _ _ Peggy _ _ shouldn’t be the only ones having fun,” _

_ You both slipped from the car, bucky rounding to your side as he offered you his arm, “so do people know you well on this side of town?” you questioned as he pulled open the diner door for you. _

_ “Mr. Barnes so good to see you!” several of the staff greeted you within the second that you stepped in. _

_ “I'll take that as my answer,” you chuckled, letting Bucky lead the two of you to a booth in the corner. He’s helping you into the corner, a curse leaving his lips, “what’s wrong?” you questioned looking up at him. _

_ “give me one second, I'll be right back forgot to grab something from the car,” he replied before he was heading back towards the door. While Bucky went out a waitress popped up, “evening sugar, Mr. Barnes is a regular here so we know his usual but what would like for this evening?” _

_ You glanced down at the menu, “just your burger and shake special, vanilla please.” you murmured giving her a warm smile. _

_ “sugar thing sugar, it’ll be right out,” she chirped turning on her heel. _

_ Your fingers tapped against the table, a puff of air leaving your lips, you turned your head only to be met with a boquet of your favorite flowers, your eyes slid up to Bucky’s, “Barnes,” you voiced drawing out his name, “what are these.” _

_ Bucky laughed passing them to you, “they’re flowers y/n, what do you think they are?” he questioned takin a seat across from you. _

_ “Now looks who’s being the smartass,” you muttered leaning in to smell the flowers, “you know you say I don’t listen but you do the same, I believe I told you no more flowers.” _

_ The waitress is bringing your food to the table and it smells just as good as it did when you were younger, “would you like me to return the flowers?”  _ _ he's _ _ questioning a teasing tone laced in his words. _

_ “don’t think about it Barnes,” you replied raising a brow, “thank you, they’re beautiful.” _

_ A comfortable silence washed over the two of you as you dug into your meals, “god this is just as I remembered it, same as when my mother would bring me when father wanted us out of the house,” you murmured around a bite of your burger. _

_ Bucky chuckled, napkin wiping at his lips, “would you come her often?” he questioned. _

_ “define often,” you laughed, “we were here almost every other day if it wasn’t to come for the burger and shake special it was to get a cold treat.” _

_ “your dad really didn’t like you around the business did he?” _

_ You shook your head popping another fry into your mouth, “ _ _ i’m _ _ sure if my father had it his way, he probably would have gotten me and my mom a separate house to live in, I didn’t even grow up in that house.” _

_ Bucky’s raising a brow at your statement, “oh,” he questioned, “what do you mean?” he asked around a bite of his burger. _

_ “You’d be surprised but when I say I knew nothing of the life my father lived I literally knew nothing, he was a very absent father too, my mom delivered me alone in the hospital, and from the stories she told me, she was always at my grandmother’s during my smaller years being a new mom and all, she struggled a lot having to care for me on her own, it wasn’t until my toddler years that it got easier for her,” you took a sip of your shake, fingers playing with the straw, “she always had me out of the house, there wasn’t a day that I wasn’t out at the shops, the diners, or at my grandmother’s.” _

_ Bucky cleared his throat, “please tell me if  _ _ I'm _ _ overstepping here, but the night your father sent you out, where did you go?” _

_ You took a bite of your fry, air leaving your lips, “I went to my grandmothers, when she found me in tears, soaking wet on her doorstep she didn’t hesitate to take me in, after telling her what had happened she refused to see my mother or answer her calls, I was against that part, I didn’t want there being any tension between my mom and her because of me, but she argued that my mother should have never let that happen, that she had always been a pawn to my father, and to some extent she was, she hid behind my father a lot, always wanting to be the doting wife,” you paused as you mulled over the next words, “when my grandmother passed away when I was 20 I skipped town, it was scary at first but I made things work, and as hard as it got for me on my own I had heeded my  _ _ father's _ _ words about never returning.” _

_ Bucky’s hand slid across the table palm up, you placed your hand in his, fingers squeezing yours, “I can’t imagine what you’ve been through, y/n” he murmured thumb running over the top of your hand, “and this life, this life isn’t for everyone, but you’ve been a damn champ taking on everything that has been thrown at you,” he pauses, “you might not have had the best family growing up y/n, hell in this life none of us do, but when you find the right people, you make your family as you go, and I promise with us you have a family, you’ll always have a family.” _

_ You can’t help the lone tear that rolls down your cheeks, Bucky being the one to catch it, his thumb running softly over your cheek, “god I'm sorry,” you chuckled through your tears, “ _ _ I _ _ really didn’t expect any of this upon first arriving,  _ _ it's _ _ just a little overwhelming,” _

_ “this life is overwhelming y/n,” he chuckled softly thumb catching your tears again. _

_ “no that’s not what I meant,” you took in a breath, “what I meant is that when I got here I didn’t expect any of this, I didn’t expect to lose my only family, and to gain another one, I didn’t expect to gain any friends, I just didn’t expect any of this, I didn’t expect you,” you murmured glancing at him. _

_ And Bucky would be lying if he said his heart hadn’t skipped a beat, could you blame him though, you were easy on the eyes, didn’t take his shit, and you tried daily to make himself see the best of him. He wasn’t going to deny he had a sweet spot for you, any man would be crazy not to have a sweet spot for you after almost month in your presence. _

_ “well I didn’t expect you either doll, but we’re here now, I have your back, you have mine, and we’ll get through this together, that’s a promise. _

_ You give his hand a squeeze, your lips part to reply but a voice from behind cuts you off, “James Buchanan Barnes is that you?” _

_ Bucky’s eyes go wide, hand tightening around yours, you turn your head slowly to see a light brunette, standing off to your side, a few feet away from you. There’s a wide grin on her lips as she closes the distance. You look to Buck who can’t seem to tear his eyes away from this mysterious woman.  _ _ It's _ _ when he speaks her name that it all pieces together, “ _ _ Dolores _ _..” _

“Wait you saw Dot at the diner?!” Peggy’s screeching, “tell me he sent her away, tell me he told her to go to hell!”

You’re shaking your head, “I wish I could Peggy, but it’s like as soon as he saw her he was entranced,” you sighed, “one minute it was just me and him, drifting close, and the next second it’s her being offered a seat next to him.”

“please y/n, please tell me it was her that asked for the seat and not him offering her,”

You ran a hand over your face, “I’m sorry Peggy I really wish I could, I'm surprised you didn’t know with you bringing up that comment about Bucky telling Steve about the boquet of flowers.”

Peggy's shaking her head as she pushes off the chair, “Bucky would never tell Steve if he ever came across Dot, Steve hates her for what she put Bucky through, he wouldn’t hear of anything to do with her,” Peggy’s sighing then, “oh Bucky,” she murmurs, “how did your night end that night?” she questioned.

You honestly wanted to withhold that part from her, but you couldn’t bring yourself to hide anything from Peggy, “there’s a reason I insisted it was nothing Peggy,” you murmured.

“Y/n what happened?”

“I ended up leaving the Diner on my own I-”

“Y/n do you know how dangerous that could have been, what were you thinking especially with Pierce and his men out there!” she cut you off.

“I called Natasha, her and Barton came for me, they let me stay at their place.”

Realization is suddenly hitting  Peggy , “y/n has Bucky been seeing Dolores this past week, is that why he hasn’t needed Steve?”

Your shrugging your shoulder’s “I honestly don’t know Pegs I haven’t seen much of Bucky since I returned back from Natasha’s.”

“god I need to call Steve,” she murmurs as she reaches for the desk phone.

Peggy’s putting the phone to her ear when a commotion is ringing through the house startling the two of you, “Peggy, y/n, I need you!” Steve is shouting out.

Peggy’s racing out of the office, you right behind her as you race to the living room, a gasp leaves your lips at the blood covering Steve’s shirt. Peggy shrieks, “Steve oh my god what happened,” she cries as she runs over to him.

“It’s Bucky, I need you to call Banner he needs to get here quick, tell him its bad.” Peggy wastes no time in running back to the office.

“y/n I need you to help me bring Bucky in.” your eyes grow wide, as you follow behind him.

You walk out of the house to be met with the backdoor of the van open Steve’s body half out of the van as he reaches in for what you can only assume is Bucky.

Your knees threaten to give out on you when you see Steve pull Bucky from the van, there’s blood covering him, a wound bleeding from his side. Your rushing over then, slinging Bucky’s arm over you as you press your hand into his side. Bucky hisses, “they have her,” he grunts, and your eyes are meeting Steve’s.

“they have who Bucky, who do they have?” Steve questions, the two of you struggling to get his limp body up the steps and into the door way.

“They have Dot, they took her, he took her,” he hisses when you settle him onto the couch your body sliding to the floor to continue applying pressure to his side.

Steve’s looking at you, then at Bucky, “Dot?” he questions, “you were with Dot?” he hisses, “what the hell Buck!”

Bucky goes to answer but there’s rapid knocks sounding at the front of the door, Steve storms away, you had never seen him so furious.

“You alright there doll, you look like you might pass out on me,” Bucky murmurs voice low, pained. 

Your heart skips in your chest, when your eyes rake over him, “you better not die Barnes, Steve looks like he needs to put you through the ringer and I need to see that.”

Steve returns with Banner in tow, “That punk is going to do much more than put me through the ringer,” he chuckles though it comes out pained, “isn’t that right Steve.”

Steve doesn’t say anything his teeth grinding as he looks over his best friend, “y/n Banner will take over now, you can come with me to the office, I need to have a word.” 

Your swallowing down the knot in your throat, your hands are leaving his side, hand bloodied as you go to stand Banner moving in. Bucky’s grabbing a hold of your hand then grabbing your attention once more, “don’t let him give you crap y/n, this one was on me, this was all me.”

You give him a weak grin as you pull your hand away moving around Banner, leaving the two men in the living room as you make your way to the office.

Steve is pacing when you enter Peggy trying to calm him, you close the doors behind you, Steve looking over at you, “what the hell y/n, he was with Dolores?!”

Guess you were getting right into it, “I really didn’t know  Steve, I haven’t seen much of him since that night she popped up at the Diner.”

“Night at the Diner?” he questioned, “was that the same night Bucky gave you the boquet of flowers?”

Your nodding “son of a bitch,” he mutters.

“Steve language!” Peggy hisses.

“I’m really sorry Steve, but I didn’t know what to do that night that Dot showed up, I know she isn’t the most liked but he was so taken with her, and it only took her calling his name for him to be captivated by her, he seemed so happy so carefree, I just I-” the words caught in your throat.

Steve’s sighing, “It’s not your fault y/n, I know you only want what’s best for him like all of us, but Dot isn’t it, that woman hurt him, I just can’t believe he hid this from me, I can’t believe he would do this, fall back into her trap.”

“well she played all the right stops, he was putty in her hands in just a few minutes, like I told Peggy earlier I had to call Natasha to come get me because I felt like I was intruding a date.”

“I knew this would happen,” he grunts, “I knew this was going to happen didn’t I tell you Peggy, didn’t I tell you she would pull some shit like this?”

“Steve you need to relax, you also need to tell Bucky the truth.”

You’re raising a brow, “tell Bucky the truth?” you questioned.

Steve’s running a hand down his face, “Bucky say’s Dot got taken, but I know that isn’t the truth, see Dolores left Bucky for a man that works for Pierce,” the name has a shiver rolling down your spine, “Bucky was never aware of it.”

Your brows scrunch in confusion, “but if Bucky wasn’t aware of it, how do you know.”

“that would be because of me,” Peggy speaks up, “Pierce had been in our part of town when I saw them, I hadn’t seen Dolores at first, but I had seen the man Pierce had been with and it took me a second to believe it was really her, but she was wrapped in his arms as they strolled down the street, the closer they got the clearer she became.”

“ So you think Dot popping up, getting under Bucky’s skin again, is all because of Pierce?” you questioned, “you think he’s finally coming out of the shadows?”

“Y/n, pierce isn’t a dumb guy,” Steve starts, “it’s been a month, he has to know something happened to  Rumlow , and while he probably doesn’t think it was  your doing he is going to go after Bucky and any of his men, an eye for an eye, he may have been radio silent for a month but it’s because he was plotting and planning and he found the perfect way to get at Bucky.”

Your heart falls in your chest, it was finally happening, you knew it was inevitable, but the thought of Pierce back scared you, you knew what he was capable of but what scared you is the lengths you he would go to.

“We have to tell Bucky,”

Steve sighed, Peggy coming to his side, “We’ve tried before y/n, that same day Peggy saw Dolores with one of Pierces men, we tried to tell him, he wouldn’t to reason then being so wound up in her presence, that he probably won’t listen to reason now.”

“But I can try Steve, you need to let me try.”

And you needed to try, you could potentially be saving Bucky’s life, saving everyone’s if you could just get him to listen, you needed him to listen.


	17. You Get What You Give

He didn’t listen; wouldn’t listen to reason , just like Steve had told you.

When banner had popped his head in to the office stating that he had fixed Barnes up, you had had the intention to make him listen . And you had given him shit till you were red in the face, anger coursing through you, and it was to no avail, he wouldn’t hear of it , and you couldn’t understand why.

“ _ didn’t I tell you he wouldn’t listen,” Steve growled, _ _ agitation growing, _ _ “he’ll never listen, you’re wasting your breath y/n!” _

_“fuck off Steve,” Bucky grunted, adjusting himself on the bloodied couch_ _,_ _“you guys don’t know what you’re saying_ _, are you even hearing yourselves?”_

_ “James Buchanan Barnes,” you hissed eyes turned to slits, “you watch your tone and how you speak to your family, we’re looking out for you!” _

_ “looking out for me, looking out for me,” he grunted, “all you guys are doing is pissing me off, why can’t you guys just let me have this?” _

_ “have what Bucky, happiness, pretend happiness,” Steve questioned “because that’s all that is Bucky, its PRETEND!” _

_ “Seriously Steve fuck off!” Bucky growled pushing himself up, face wincing, “she’s back Steve, she’s here, let me have this, let me fucking have this, she brings me happiness that I haven't felt in a long while.” _

_ Steve’s shaking his head a scoff falling from his lips, “so as soon as she comes back into your life, you just forget about everything she did, everything WE had to go through to get you out of the space SHE left you in, everything Y/N has done to help you get to where you are now, you’re just going to tell us to fuck off because she pops up, pops up and does what, bat her lashes and call you James?” _

_ “Yeah that’s exactly what I'm saying Steve,” he hisses and your heart drops in your chest, seeing Steves posture fall in defeat, “I’m happy, either let me have this, or  _ _ get out _ _ , and don’t try and tell me otherwise.” _

_ “Bucky!” you grunt, Steve lets out a tired laugh, “it’s fine y/n, like I said don’t waste another breath, he doesn’t want to listen,” he shrugs, “ _ _ but  _ _ that’s fine _ _ , _ _ I'm done,” he's looking at Bucky again, “the second she hurts you again, I don’t want to hear about it Barnes, I'm done trying to pick up the pieces she’s left behind I’m done trying to get you to listen, to see,” he’s turning to you then, “I'm sorry y/n, I-” _

_ “Steve _ _ , _ _ please don’t do this, I know he’s being an ass and not listening to reason but please don’t do this, he might not need you, but I need you, we agree Pierce is a threat, look at what he’s doing and he hasn’t even done anything!” _

_ “He hasn’t done anything?” He questions, “look at what he did already, look at who he’s gone after y/n, he’s hitting us where he knows it’ll hurt,”  _ _ Steve’s giving you a tired smile, “I’m sorry y/n, I understand what you’re saying trust me I get it, but I can’t watch my best friend, my brother, get hurt again by that broad because he’s been blinded by her, I won’t, please don’t ask that of me.” _

_Your heart breaks in your chest, a part of you doesn’t understand why what’s happening is happening, but before a month ago, you didn’t know any of them, you didn’t know what Bucky went through, what Steve went through, what any of them went through._ _You only know the them from a month ago, you don’t know their history, you don’t know their past, the pain they’ve gone through_ _to get to where they were now._ _Steves running a hand over his face and you know this decision is hurting him more than he cares to admit._

_ His eyes lock with yours,  _ _ “If you need anything, you can always give us a call, and I'll try and send you the right person for help, but other than that, _ _ ” he’s breathing out a shaky sigh, “ _ _ fuck _ _ , _ _ I'm sorry y/n,” you watch as he turns away walking towards the front door. _

_ Peggy looks after her husband _ _ defeat in her eyes as well _ _ ; she turns towards you then, her feet carrying her closer, “If you need anything at all,  _ _ like Steve said  _ _ give us a call, give Steve some time, he’s just hurt, I'm sorry you had to  _ _ be witness _ _ to _ _ any of this,” she murmurs giving your hand a squeeze, she's looking over your shoulder, “James,” she _ _ murmurs  _ _ giv _ _ ing _ _ him a nod before she's parting away _ _ ,  _ _ her feet moving after Steve, “if you need anything y/n give us a call _ _ , I meant it anything at all” _ _ she calls back over her shoulder. _

_ It's when the door is falling closed behind them, a click resonating through the home that you snap your head towards Bucky, “what the hell is wrong with you, how could you speak like that to him, to them!” _

_ Bucky’s rolling his eyes, a groan leaving his lips, “leave it alone y/n, I'm not in the mood,” he grunted. _ _ He really wasn’t in the mood he was angry _ _ ; angry _ _ that he had lashed out at his  _ _ best friends _ _ , angry _ _ that  _ _ Pierce had taken him by surprise, and angry that he couldn’t protect the ones he loved from this life, and the pain that came with it. _

_ “oh but you think I am?” you questioned, “you think I want to be doing this, to fight to get you to open your eyes?” _

_ “Then why are you doing it y/n, hmm?” he grunts angrily, “why are you trying so _ _ hard _ _ to get me to open my eyes, what do you want me to open my eyes too, you really expect me to believe that Dolores is working for Pierce _ _ , you really think she would do that,  _ _ other than me telling you _ _ the  _ _ little bits about her, you don’t know her like I do, where’s the proof of this accusation _ _ hmm _ _?” _

_“_ _I’m_ _doing this for them, for your family Barnes_ _,_ _” you_ _grit out,_ _“_ _and that’s_ _exactly what we’re trying to get you to see, what_ _I_ _am trying to get you to see, think about it Bucky, she was gone how long,” you questioned waving you_ _r_ _hand around, “_ _and what,_ _all of a sudden she pops up, Bucky the man she left you for_ _is now_ _a man of Pierces_ _, and your proof is through Peggy,_ _Peggy knows all the men that worked for you, and those that no longer work for you,_ _you really think she would lie to you_ _,_ _her_ _own family_ _?” you questioned. “_ _Put two and two together Bucky, Pierce has been radio silent for a month, after the first week he had to have known something happened to Rumlow_ _you said it yourself for crying out loud_ _,_ _c’mon_ _you really think Pierce was going to just remain silent, let us take one of his_ _men’s_ _life without their being repercussions, Bucky Pierce will stop at nothing, NOTHING to finish a job and look at what he's done, he’s found YOUR weakness.”_

 _Bucky lets out a dry laugh, “you know everything, now don’t you?” he grunts in question, “you’ve been in the life a month and suddenly you think you know how everything_ _works,_ _Y/n_ _,_ _Dot would never ever work for a man like Pierce_ _and you wanna know why?” He questioned, “_ _she hated what I did, what my father_ _did, she hated this life,_ _so for you to tell me that she would_ _fall into the arms of one of Pierces men_ _, who was previously one of mine_ _,_ _and then work with him to get to me, I just, I_ _can't_ _believe it, I refuse to believe it_ _she would never do it_ _, she didn’t want this life and she had proved that to me time and time again during our time together_ _.”_

 _A groan of frustration leaves your lips,_ _“_ _First off_ _I’m not pretending to know anything,_ _because I don’t know_ _enough about this life_ _” you hiss, “_ _I know you want to believe that Dot would never betray you like this, but think back to the day that she left you,_ _you found her with one of your own, one you fired, Pierce most likely offered him a job_ _because of his connections to you_ _, and with the luxuries that comes with this life how could Dot resist,_ _” a sigh leaves your lips as you look over his unwavering glare,_ _“_ _listen Bucky,_ _I told you I was going to be there for you, to help you, and I'm not going to turn my back on my word_ _, but I just need you_ _t-”_

_ “I’m not asking you to help, I don’t need your help.” _ _ He  _ _ cuts you off _ _. _

_ Your shaking your head, “A week in her presence and look how much she has changed you, _ _ did more than I could in a month it seems,” _

_ “You don’t know me!” he growled _ _. _

_ “You’re right I don’t,” a pause, “but I thought I was finally starting too, I guess I was wrong.” _

_ “what's that supposed to mean?” he questions _ _ brows furrowed _ _. _

_ You go to rub your hand over your face, but recall the blood still on your hands, “nothing bucky,” you  _ _ reply tiredly, you  _ _ turn on your heel making your way to the stairs. _

_ “where are you going?” he calls out, “none of your concern _ _ , I'll be back shortly to get you into bed.” _ _ comes your reply. _

It had taken a week for Bucky to heal, and within that week his life had fallen apart, most literally. Not only had he lost those closest to him it seems, but you had done it, you had showed him what you had so badly wanted him to see the first night, the thing he refused to believe.

_ It  _ _ was _ _ day three after the incident, and he had been lying in his bed, eyes lingering on the black phone on his nightstand. He wanted to pick it up to get a hold of Steve, to ask him to come over to talk to him, but he had messed up, he had said horrible things, things he wouldn’t even forgive himself for. He knew you had spoken to them after the first  _ _ night  _ _ because Sam  _ _ had been _ _ sent in Steve’s place. And like you, Sam didn’t take Bucky’s shi _ _ t, he could only take so much of him, especially after Steve had informed him of why he couldn’t  _ _ go  _ _ himself _ _ , _ _ to say the least he was pissed _ _.  _ _ Day three had been Sams breaking point with Bucky and the second he had the brunette alone he let him have it. _

_ “You’re real lucky it was y/n that  _ _ pleaded with _ _ Steve for help, because had it been you, I would have told you to go right to hell.” _

_ “not you too,” he groaned, a hiss leaving his lips as Sam adjusted him higher onto the pillow, “Jesus Sam be careful man, you're going to tear my stitches!” _

_ “and I should do more,” he grunted pulling away, “what you did, what you said to your closest family, man I’m surprised they even stayed, that they’re still offering help, I would have left you to fend on your own.” _

_ “ _ _ There it is, then _ _ why are you here,” he growled, “no one’s asking you to be here either Sam, I don’t need this!” _

_ “no one’s asking us to be here? no  _ _ one's _ _ asking us to-” Sam’s shaking his head, “unfucking believable Bucky, y/n is asking us to be here regardless of the ass you have been, she has been working tirelessly on her own might I add to piece shit together for you, she’s been helping you when you don’t even deserve it!”  _ _ A scoff leaves his lips _ _ ,  _ _ fingers  _ _ rubbing at his tense jaw, “you know I didn’t want to believe it when Steve called me that night and told me she had done it again, that she had gotten under your skin once more.” _

_ “don’t start with th -” _

_ “no she did!” he yelled, “she got under your skin so bad you can’t even see how you’re treating the ones who care about you, the ones who were there when she left you high and dry, your family!” _

_ “Enough Sam!” he growled glaring. _

_ Sam’s jaw clenched, “man I don’t know why y/n is even bothering with you, when you obviously don’t care, screw this,” he grunted, “I'm out, if y/n wonders why no one wants to come around, let her know that’s on you.” Bucky watched Sam  _ _ storm _ _ from the room. _

_ “Son of a bitch!” Bucky yelled, hand swinging out, the lamp crashing to the floor, shards flying from the impact. _

_ “what did the poor lamp do to you?” you murmured from where you stood in the doorway tray in hand. _

_ His head banged against the headboard, “what are you still doing here y/n,  _ _ surprised you didn’t leave with Sam _ _ on his way out.” he muttered. _ __

_ “because then you’d really be alone _ _ , _ _ ” you sighed _ _ , stepping around the glass shards, “ _ _ you’re pushing anyone who cares about you away Barnes.” _

_“y/n,” Bucky warned,_ _“I_ _just_ _need to get b_ _etter so that I can go after Pierce, so I can get Dot_ _back_ _,”_ _he muttered to himself_ _eyes staring you down as you brought him the tray, “what’s this?” he questioned_ _as you placed the tray down_ _on hi_ _s_ _lap, it was in_ _regards to the manilla folder under his plate._

_ You swallowed the knot in your throat,  _ _ “I didn’t want to be the one to do this, but I needed you to see, I can’t watch you push more of your family away, I’m really sorry Bucky _ _ , I know you w _ _ ould have wanted things to be different.” _ __

_ Bucky wants to question you, ask you why it is you’re saying what you’re saying but your leaving his side feet moving _ _ you _ _ to the door, “I'll be in the office _ _ , _ _ ” you murmured turning to face him, “call if you need me,” _

_A_ _heavy weight_ _sits on his chest, he’s seen these folders before, they were the same one’s your father had on his desk_ _, the ones he had received from Pierce_ _. He goes for the folder first_ _,_ _wanting to ease his_ _mind, it’s probably nothing_ _. His_ _breakfast_ _is_ _forgotten as he opens_ _the envelope_ _, his breath catch_ _ing_ _in his throat_ _as he pulls out the contents,_ _he finds pictures of him and dot,_ _places_ _they had_ _visited_ _in the past week_ _, time_ _he had spent with her after meeting her in the Diner that evening_ _. He can’t quite understand wh_ _at any of this means_ _as he flips through the pictures_ _or why_ _you would say what you said until he_ _comes across_ _the last three pictures, they’re of dot_ _;_ _dot and a man_ _-_ _the man that had worked for him_ _, dot,_ _the man that ha_ _d worked for him,_ _and pierce._

_ You had been right _ _ , but how, why? _

_ His jaw is clenching, anger radiating through him _ _ the longer he looks at the last picture. He _ _ throws the file _ _ , pictures flying every which way,  _ _ the breakfast you made him crashing to the floor. He’s throwing the sheets off his body, swinging his legs over the side, his body is protesting, pleading for him to slow down, but all he  _ _ feel _ _ s is blind rage.  _

_ He takes one, two, three steps before he's crashing to the floor, and god if it doesn’t remind him of the first time, it all feels like the first time, and a scream tears from his lips, it's an agonizing scream that has you running from the office _ _ , and back to his room. _

_ “Oh my god Bucky!” _

_ Your skidding to a stop falling to the floor with him,  _ _ glass shard digging into your jeans,  _ _ hands reaching out to try and get him up, “why?” he cries, and a breath catches in your throat, because he sounds so broken, _ _ his _ _ voice cracking where the tears threaten to spill, this hadn’t been your intention when you decided to show him the file. “why does she always do this to me, she fucking finds her way under my skin, makes a home in my heart, and just fucking rips it all away in a matter of seconds, no explanation, no anything she just leaves, and I let her, I let her, because I loved her.” _

_ “Bucky I-” _

_“There’s a reason I could never bring myself to listen to Steve or Peggy, there’s a reason I chose to turn a blind eye,” he breathes, and its shaky, a sniffle ringing through the room, “I loved her y/n,” his head turns up watery eyes meet yours and your breath catches in your throat, you had never seen a man more broken, “I loved her, and I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, the day she left with_ _one of my own_ _m_ _en_ _I wanted to believe she would come back, or that she would find her way back to me, I thought she was my soulmate, the one for me,” a choked sob is falling from his lips, your own eyes threatening to water, “but when Peggy and Steve brought up that they had seen her with the other man not even a week after she had left, and the other man be one of Pierces_ _new_ _men, I didn’t want to believe she could actually do that, I didn’t want to believe her betrayal could run that deep,” a shaky breath, “she knew y/n, she knew the type of man Pierce was, what he did, what_ _he_ _was and to think she could do something like this_ _she hated this life, she tried everyday to get me out of it to make me a better man_ _so I-_ _, I just, I didn’t want to believe it,_ _how could she do this when she knew our rivalry, have that man, one_ _of my_ _own_ _in our home,_ _she was supposed to love me_ _, she was supposed to love me,” he gritted out._

_ Your heart ached for him _ _ , _ _ as much as you couldn’t agree with his behavior _ _ on day one you were beginning to see why he had acted so rash, he thought her returning was a sign, he thought  _ _ this had been their second chance _ _ , he believed it had been fate, her stumbling upon him at the diner. _

_ “ I thought seeing her that evening at the Diner _ _ was fate, how stupid was I,” he huffed _ _ , “ _ _ you were right, you were all right, I let a week with her blind me _ _ ,  _ _ I can’t believe she would do this _ _ , _ _ I just,” he’s sucking in a shaky breath _ _ wiping at his eyes _ _ , “h-how did you get those photos?” _

_ “Sam brought them to me, _ __ _ he mentioned  _ _ they were delivered to his  _ _ office _ _ , _ _ he wasn’t able to give me a time frame of when he thought they were d _ _ ropped off _ _ since he was out of town the week you were with dot _ _ , _ _ he said the  _ _ person  _ _ that delivered them  _ _ was likely Pierce _ _ though his secretary hadn’t even know they’d been delivered either _ _ , he also said it was probably apart of his scheme to milk it further _ _ , he thinks Pierce was hoping that Sam would find them before the accident occurred to make taking _ _ Dot _ _ further believable.” _

_“S-so_ _those last three photos are from who_ _surely Pierce wouldn’t have had those photos taken_ _” He questioned though he had a feeling he already knew._

_ A sigh is leaving your lips, “Peggy dropped by this morning with Sam she wanted to  _ _ help me  _ _ work on the many  _ _ files _ _ that were piling  _ _ up in the office _ _ ,  _ _ when she passed me them she said her intentions weren’t to hurt you, but to keep you from a world of hurt.” _

_ He shook his head, hand punching the floor _ _ glass shar _ _ ds _ _ cutting at his hands _ _ , more tears filling his eyes, “son.of.a.bitch _ _ SON OF A BITCH!” _

_ You flinched at his anger the pain radiating off of him in waves. _

_ “How could I have let this happen,  _ _ fucking Pierce used her against me _ _ he actually used her against me _ _ , he knew, he fucking new _ _ , and she just went with it” _ _ he hissed, “I said hurtful things, I pushed  _ _ people who cared from me away, and all for what, what did I get out of it _ _ , Dot still has everything just like the first time, and I’m left alone.” _ _ another pained sob is leaving his lips, his form caving in on itself. _

_ “James,” you murmur shaky hands reaching out to lay on his shoulder, “you’re not alone.” _

_ “I pushed my family away y/n, I was hurtful, I was an asshole, like hell I didn’t push them away, I wouldn’t help me either after the way I spoke to Steve.” _

_ A frustrated sigh leaves your lips, “yes you were all of those things, but Bucky family is forever, what family do you know that doesn’t have falling outs hmmm?” you questioned, “Bucky you have done so much for those you call your family and while they have every right to be upset with you, I know that they could never stay mad at you, they care so deeply about you, they just didn’t want to see you hurt, they had seen you go through so much the first time, they refused to let it happen a second time around.” _

_ “w-why are you still here y/n, why did you stay, you could have left that night with Steve and Peggy, why did you stay, continue to stay?” he questions red, puffy, eyes looking back at you. _

_ I should have left that night at the Diner when you left me feeling like a third wheel,” you chuckled, “but there was something about seeing Dot that night that didn’t sit right with me, I had this bad feeling sitting on my chest, and I guess I was right to go with how I felt,” a sigh, “Bucky I stayed because I made you a promise, and maybe it was too quick of me, but over this past month you have all grown to be my family, and since I couldn’t protect my parents, couldn’t save them from Pierce, I'd be damned if he got his hands on any more people I consider family, I wanted to leave that night don’t get me wrong, but I stayed for them, I stayed because they needed me too, they needed me to be here for you.” _

_ “but why, I don’t deserve it y/n, I don’t deserve to have their help, your help, to have you care for me when I said what I said.” _

_ “I might not have ever been given the chance to experience love, but I heard it can make you do/say crazy things you might not mean, there’s words and then theirs actions James, and from what I've also heard actions speak louder than words.” _

_ “but I-” _

_ Your shaking your head, “do better, be better,” you replied softly, “now come on let's get you back onto that bed, you're bleeding from your wound, and your hands, and if you really want to take down Pierce, I'm going to need you in better shape than this, we all are.” _

_ Bucky couldn’t quite understand why you stayed, why you continued to help.  _

_ Day four had him feeling better _ _ though thoroughly bandaged _ _ , _ _ and he had slipped from his room to find you in his office, his _ **_ family _ ** _ all surrounding you as you _ _ went over what could only be information on Pierce. _ _ He wanted to be in there, wanted to pitch his own ideas to the room to _ _ , _ _ but he didn’t  _ _ want to intrude, he hadn’t forgiven himself  _ _ for his behavior.  _ _ While Steve was speaking on his findings or whereabouts your eyes had found his, but a finger to his lips _ _ and him limping away _ _ , had the call of his name dying in your throat. _

_ Day five has you redressing his wounds in the early morning, there’s a comfortable silence in the room as you re-bandage his hands. _

_ “He saw you you know, was wondering why you didn’t join.” you murmured eyes focused on the gauze in your hand. _

_ He glances, up at you brow raised, “who?” he questions quietly. _

_ “Steve.” _

_ Bucky swallows the knot in his throat, “you didn’t need me in there,” is his reply, “the work you’re doing, the way you bring them in together you’re doing just fine, I'd only take up space.” _

_ Your eyes meet his, “is that really the excuse you want to go with, it’s only you and me here, you can tell me the truth.” _

_ Bucky slouches against the headboard, “I didn’t feel like I deserved to be around you all, I haven’t forgiven myself just like I don’t expect any of you to have forgiven me.” _

_ A sigh is leaving your lips, “and that’s not your decision to make James, if we’ve forgiven you or not that’s on us, Bucky we have a job we need to do, Pierce is getting ballsy, he’s been strutting around your area and he’s been threatening businesses on your streets, your people are getting scared, there’s only so much we can do, we need you.” _

_ Bucky’s shaking his head, “y/n 1-” _

_ “Bucky this thing with Pierce is above any of us; above the fights, the words you didn’t mean, above the forgiveness you don’t think you deserve, you need to push it all aside like we’ve done, we need to stop Pierce before this really blows up, we need you, and I need you to understand that we can’t do this without you, they can’t do this without you.” _

_ He’s taken back by your words, and they resonate something within him, and he can’t help but watch you as you leave his side. He watches you stop outside of his door, eyes finding his over your shoulder, “the other’s will be here tomorrow, please consider joining us.” _

_ Day six has him walking into the office, the room growing quiet as he walks around them, standing next to where your sitting as his desk, you go to stand but he’s shaking his head, “you’re fine where you are.” _

_ “surprised you join us, didn’t think you’d have it in you,” Sam grunts from in front of him. _

_ “Sam,” you warn brow raised, and he’s looking from you to Bucky, “it’s fine y/n.” Bucky murmurs from next to you. _

_ The meeting continues, and Bucky stands by your side, hearing all the information being shared, he had stopped adding his input in an hour ago, it had seemed anytime he had something to add it was only met with a jab of anger from Sam or Steve, and he understood where they came from, they were mad, upset, and he deserved every harsh thing they had to say, even when he had stopped adding his thoughts. _

_ Your hand is slamming down onto the desk, hands rubbing at your face, “what is up with you all today,” and you’re referring to the men in the room, “are any of those words your throwing at James even necessary or essential to things revolved around Pierce?” you questioned your agitation peeking through. Steve and Sam glance down, “y/n is right, I get that some of us still may be upset with Bucky, but a lot of what you have said is extremely unnecessary, though he deserves it.” Peggy adds. _

_ “Maybe this hadn’t been a good idea,” Bucky murmurs moving towards the door. _

_ “don’t you dare take another step Barnes.” you grunt, you’re pushing off from the desk then standing on your feet, hands supporting yourself on the desk, “as I told Bucky yesterday morning, this is bigger than all of us, it's bigger than any anger you have for Bucky,” you add, “Pierce is a threat and he’s only getting worse, you all need to brush whatever feelings you have under the rug for now because this is bigger than any of us, so whatever anger, hate, sorrow you have, I need you to push it aside because right now we all need each other if we’re going to take Pierce down.” _

_ A scoff leaves Sam’s lips, “Samuel enough,” you groan “seriously guys, I get it you’re upset, what Bucky said to Steve was not right, he shouldn’t have said any of those words, but as much as you hate to except it you need him,” you shake your head, “I can’t do his job for him guys, I can’t run his streets like he does, and I can’t allow this to go on any longer, if you guys can’t fix this, can’t listen to one another, than we have no chance of taking Pierce down, and I tell you this because if we go out there, and you can’t work with one another, one of you is going to get yourself hurt or worse,” a sigh falls from your lips, “I’m not asking you to forgive him, I'm asking for you to listen to each other, I'm asking you as a family unit to try and listen to one another the days are just passing us by, and Pierce is only going to continue to his worse unless you all can get it together and figure this out.” _

_ Your moving away from the desk, bypassing them all as you move towards the doors, “where are you going?” Steve questions. _

_ “I refuse to sit in here and watch this once strong unit fall apart, talk, listen, and fix the issue.” you reply fingers wrapping around the doorknobs as you close the French doors. _

_ Talk, listen, and fix they tried, and Bucky took whatever insult was hurled his way, he understood all of it the pain, the anger, the hurt, and he apologized over and over, but he knew it wasn’t enough he knew it would never be enough, but he tried, and he explained his reasons. By the end of it he felt defeated, while they had all as a unit come to an agreement, none of it had felt right, there was no hugging, no laughing, no jokes, it all felt very formal, very cold. But his had been his doing; he had pushed them this far. _

_ You find him later in the night in his office, form slouched in the chair as he looks over all the files you all had compiled. Your soft knocks pull his eyes away from the papers, “everything okay?” you questioned feet carrying you closer. _

_ “Define okay?” he mumbles a small tired smile pulling at his lips. _

_ “James,” you drawl out his name, brow raised at his behavior. _

_ He shakes his head, “I know, I know,” he mutters. _

_ “do you want to talk about it?” you question. _

_ He’s shaking his head, “do you ever think they’ll forgive me, to really forgive me?” he questions. _

_ A sigh leaves your lips, “I’m not sure but you can’t let how they choose to treat you after everything has been said and done deter you, I meant what I said Bucky actions speak louder than words, you must do better, be better, show them you actually mean what you said, and it’s not just words.” _

_ “I just feel I've lost everything,” he murmurs, though its meant more for himself, but you catch it nonetheless. _

_ “you haven’t lost everyone,” you murmur. _

_ “and that’s another thing I can’t understand, why you continue to stick around.” _

_ “Because everyone needs a friend, even though you're a great big jerk sometimes,” you chuckled pulling a smile from him, “you’ve already been through a lot and you’ve lost a lot, I’m not saying I forgive your actions because I'm sure you wouldn’t accept it, but just know I'm here, and hey I've got your back, you’ve got mine or at least I hope you do, so we’ll get through this together.” _

_ Those words ring in Bucky’s mind, “I’m sorry about that night y/n, that night shouldn’t have gone like that I-” _

_ You raise a hand, “it’s in the past for now Bucky, I'll hold it over you once we take Pierce down.” _

_ “I wouldn't expect anything less.” he murmurs offering you a small smile. _

_ “You should get some rest Bucky, I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a long day, and I'd really like to give you your job back.” you laughed. _

_ He’s laughing along with you kicking off from the desk as he follows you out of the office, seeing you off to the stairs, “goodnight y/n,” he calls out as you make your way up the stairs, “goodnight Bucky,” you call back, and remember, do better.” _

_ Bucky gives you a nod, taking your words with him to bed, the words resonating deep within him as he pulls the covers over him that night, he would do better, he needed to, he would put a stop to all this. He would be better. _

It’s day seven; a week, and while Bucky feels like his world is falling apart, he refuses to let it get any worse. He’s the first one up that morning, and he’s the first one in the office, a determination set in him. Everyone is surprised to see him to say the least even yourself, they hadn’t been the kindest to him yesterday evening and they weren’t sure he would even show himself this morning. As soon as everyone is in the office Bucky is kicking off the meeting, “I’ve looked over all the information gathered on Pierce, I’ve seen all the pictures, notes he’s left of dot’s supposed hostage situation, and the threats he’s leaving to the businesses, he’s getting ballsy like y/n said that’s for sure, we need to go about our next step in a smart manner, we all know how Pierce can get, how dirty he likes to play, so we need to be smart I refuse to let any of you get hurt in this, does anyone have any suggestions on how they’d like to play this?”

Your surprised quite literally when everyone starts communicating like adults, there’s no jabs, no sass, no hate. You’re by the door watching them talk strategy when Peggy sidles over to you, her arm hooking in yours, “thank you,” she murmurs eyes not leaving the group.

Your head turns to face her, “for?” you question, she looks at you then, “for being here, for bringing us together, for not letting us completely fall apart.”

Your squeezing her arm then eyes drifting back to the group, “couldn’t let you guys fall apart, you need each other, you all would be lost with each other,”

And it was true, you could see that without one another they couldn’t quite function as well as they did when they had each other.


	18. Loves A Loaded Gun

You peered out over the balcony, eyes breathing in the bright colors squeezing through the fluffy clouds barely making it through. A shiver rolled through you as the wind picked up some, your fingers curling around your plush cardigan pulling it tighter around your body. The scent of rain and something else hung heavy in the air, angry gray clouds rolling in from the south, swallowing the morning clouds as they rolled closer. Rain began to drizzle around you; it seemed whenever something was going to go wrong in your life, there was always rain around. You wondered what it would bring you today, what could it possibly bring along when you felt you had already gone through it all.

“Y/n?” you turned your head to the balcony doors, “Tony’s here.”

You gave a nod looking out once more to the gloomy sky before turning on your heel, feet carrying you towards Steve. The two of you walked in silence through the home, making you way to the office, Tony in a seat by your desk. He turned when he heard your approach, “Y/n, great to see you,” he murmured shaking your hand, “though the circumstances not so much.” he added taking his seat once more as you rounded your desk.

“I can’t thank you enough for helping out with this Detective stark, I wouldn’t have even known where to start, we’re all a little lost here.”

Tony’s shaking his head, waving your statement off, “Call me Tony Y/n, and I’m glad you called really, Barnes and I may not have been on the best of terms, but he has always been there for me and for my department so my help is always on the table when it comes to him.”

“thank you, Tony, really,” you started, “have you found anything out, I know it’s only been a day since I called you, but it’s been 3 weeks since we started organizing ourselves together to take down Pierce, and then for this to happen, I just - I know Pierce is behind this, I just don’t know why Bucky would go after him alone we promised we would all go in together, we knew the repercussions if we didn’t, it just doesn’t make sense; it didn’t make sense to me that night he explained it to me and it doesn’t make sense today.” you sighed, “I feel like I can’t explain to the others the reasons for his decisions when he very well didn’t give me an explanation himself.”

Tony reached down slightly producing a kraft clasp envelope sliding it over to you, your brows furrowed in confusion, “what’s this?” you questioned.

“Barnes left this in my office what I assume to be was the night he left on his little ‘death run’ though because it was after hours that he left this I wouldn’t know for sure,” you raised a brow at the statement, “open it, there’s some things in there that I believe you need to see,”

You carefully picked at the envelope, hand tilting it to get the contents from within, your breath caught in your throat heart beat picking up speed, “w-what is this,” you murmured face going pale.

It was images of you; various ones, these looked eerily the same as the ones that had been taken in your apartment of you except these weren’t from your time in your apartment, these were recent from your time in Bucky’s home. You kept flipping through them dread filling you the further and further you got into the stack. You were flipping to another one when you stopped, fingers shaking as you read over the printed note,

“fancy a trade up, I’ll hand you over Dolores for y/n don’t dwell too long though I’m not as patient of a man as you are.”

“I believe the reason Bucky left that night without telling anyone anything much less giving you the full reason of why he had to go after Pierce himself is because he didn’t want to trade your life for another, Barnes isn’t that type of man, he probably thought it’d be a lot easier if he went in alone, make the negotiating a little easier,”

“Negotiating, negotiating,” you questioned a little louder, “why would he negotiate for Dots life after she betrayed him!” you hissed your anger getting the better of you.

“I’m not saying that’s the reason but it could very well be.”

“It can’t Tony,” Steve spoke up, “Barnes had every intention of taking them all down, including Dolores.”

Tony looked over at you, “it’s true,” you murmured voice shaky as you continued to look through the photos. When you came to the last photo you heart skipped in your chest, legs likely to have given out on you, if you hadn’t been sitting.

“Y/n, y/n you okay?” Steve questions moving over to you. He looks at the photo that has you in this state, “y/n what is it,” Steve urges needing you to speak.

“I-it’s from that n-night, Steve this is from the night two days ago that Bucky left,” your eyes are snapping to Tony’s, “was this already in the file?”

Tony’s shaking his head “no, that was delivered to my office this morning, right before I came to you, y/n I need you to tell me whatever Bucky might have told you the night that he left.

How could you have forgotten that night with the picture of how your night ended staring right back at you.

_You had just wrapped up the latest whereabouts on Pierce, and your plan to finally bring him and his group down. All of you had felt confident in your plan after discussing it together, you all were sure this was going to work, well all of you except for Bucky. Where he once had been so sure of himself you could see himself holding back. He had begun to question all of you if it would really be wise going in all together, “maybe one of us should go in alone as to not throw anybody off, and that way if something goes sideways we don’t risk everyone.”_

_You couldn’t help but to worry about this sudden behavior, had something changed within the past three weeks, was he having a change of heart? Nonetheless the group had talked him down, regardless of the number going in this would be your best bet, it was better than sending in one like Bucky so suddenly suggested and something happening to them and not being able to notify the others. Although at the end of the night you had come to agreement – a time, and place to meet –Buckys words still seemed forced, although you didn’t know Bucky as long as the others had, you knew there had been a shift within him, you knew he was hiding something, and you hoped he would tell you before things got bad._

_Bucky has left the office to see the others off, you had bid them all a goodbye opting to straighten up the office before heading to bed.Bucky had left the office to see the others off, you had bid them all a goodbye opting to straighten up the office before heading to bed._

_“Thought you would be heading to bed by now, everything okay?” you put the files together in a neat pile before turning to face him, your hip leaning against the desk, you pursed your lips looking him over, he tensed, “I could ask you the same thing, something you would care to share with me?”_

_Bucky cleared his throat, a shift in his facial expression, “what do you think I would need to share with you?” he questioned, he was guarded._

_“You don’t have to do that,” your murmured eyes staring into his._

_“Do what?” he questioned gruffly eyes turning darkening slightly, you were picking at him._

_“Bucky whatever it is you didn’t want to tell the others, you don’t have to hide it from me, whatever it is, is obviously waying heavy on you, so what is it, you can tell me, you don’t have to put up your uard with me I-”_

_“I’m not doing anything, I’m not hiding anything!” he grunted, jaw clenching._

_“Your stance is telling me otherwise Barnes,” you sighed “Bucky what happened to I had your back and you had mine, I meant what I said”_

_“Y/n can we please not do this,” he pleaded, “we’re all finally in a good place, please, please, don’t push this.”_

_“Bucky nothing is going to change where we stand now, I’m just trying to help you, its obvious somethings bothering you, and you refused to voice it to the group.”_

_“Y/n please,” his eyes slip shut, fingers rubbing at them, he’s cracking you can tell, “there is nothing wrong, it’s just been a long day, and the thought of being so close to taking down Pierce is just getting to me.”_

_Your arms crossed over your chest, “you want to try again, because I still don’t believe you.”_

_His eyes snap open, he’s pissed, good, “Y/n,” he warns, “stop.”_

_“no not until you,” a gasp leaves your lips as he stomps over to you, body hovering over you, inches away from you, “I said stop,” his face falls, “please just stop, I - I can’t”_

_His head drops, you breath catches in your throat, shaky hands reach out to cup his cheek, he looks at you through his lashes, “Bucky please,” now you’re the one pleading, “I promise you can tell me anything, please.”_

_“you wouldn’t understand,”_

_“try me.” you challenged._

_A sigh left his lips, he knew you, he knew how you were, “you don’t listen do you,” he chuckled lowly with a shake of his head, your hand moving with the gesture from where it still rested against his cheek, “I thought we had been through this Barnes, you have to bribe me with Burgers and Shakes to buy my compliance.”_

_Soft laughter falls from his lips, a shaky breath following after, your hand moved down to his chin, fingers pushing his face up to get him to look at you, “James, please tell me what’s wrong you have me worried.”_

_“you going soft on me sweetheart,” your cheeks flamed at the name, “oh you are, aren’t you,” he smirked._

_You smacked his cheek lightly with your fingers, “quit it,” you murmured, “and so what if I am, I told you I had a thing for mob bosses.” oh you tease he thought, “is that so?” he questioned._

_Your breath caught in your throat from his look alone, “think my dad knew what he was doing when he asked you to make sure I was okay.”_

_Your dad, your dad._

_“Fuck,” he hisses under his breath, “fuck,”_

_“Bucky, what is it?”_

_Strong hands are grabbing a hold of your face, the breath knocked out of you from his touch alone, why did this feel new, he had done this before._

_“sweetheart, I know I don’t have a burger or shake for you but I need you to listen, I just need you to listen okay, can you do that for me?”_

_“Bucky wh-”_

_“please,” your mouth snaps shut, “I already know you’re going to give me shit, but,” you raise a brow at him, “but I need to go after Pierce alone,” you go to argue against his word, but he beats you to it, “Y/n your dad asked me to keep you safe, and I’m going to do that doll, but I also need to keep my men safe as well, Pierce isn’t playing this time y/n he’s out for blood, and I can’t let you get hurt, I won’t allow it.”_

_You’ve held your tongue long enough, “and you think I’ll allow you to risk your life for mine?” you questioned angrily, “Bucky this is as much my fight as it is yours, you can’t ask me to just stand back and let you go on this suicide mission alone!”_

_“I’m not asking sweetheart.”_

_Your breath is catching in your throat, your shaking your head, trying to get his hold off of you, “no Bucky,” you grunted trying to push him away, “you – you can’t,”_

_“Would you just stop y/n,” you smacked his hands, “y/n stop,” he grunted grabbing ahold of your hands pressing them to your side before he was engulfing you in his arms._

_“Please don’t do this Bucky let us help you, let me help you,” you whispered into his shoulder. A shaky sigh left his lips, “y/n trust me if there was another way to do this I would do it, but sweetheart you have to trust me, you have to, I need you too.”_

_A frustrated groan leaves your lips, your hand pushing him away from you, but he doesn’t go far, “stop with this whole martyr complex Bucky, you don’t have to fight this alone, you don’t have to do this alone to prove anything to anybody,”_

_“Y/n that’s not what I’m trying to do,” he’s just as frustrated as you are, “I am trying to keep you safe; I owe this to your father!” he voices exasperatedly drawing out each word._

_“You don’t owe my father shit; you don’t owe anybody anything!” why isn’t he understanding, “Bucky you can’t expect me to be okay with this, I lost enough family, I refuse to lose anyone else, if I let you do this and shit goes sideways I would never forgive myself for letting you go without trying my hardest to stop you, the others can’t do this without you, they would be lost without you, why can’t you see that!”_

_His resolve is failing him, he just wants to take it all back, pull you into his arms and tell you he’s sorry and he’s not going to go through with it, but if he wants to keep you safe, he needs to._

_He has to lie._

_A sigh leaves his lips, “c’mere,”_

_Your shaking your head, “no.”_

_“Y/n, sweetheart come here, I don’t want you going to be mad at me, you won’t sleep well and neither will I.”_

_You huff, “does it matter?” you questioned, “you’re still going to go aren’t you, you’re still going to leave no matter what I say.”_

_“I’m not going too,” a lie._

_“bullshit Barnes,” you murmur, “you know what, do whatever it is you so badly think it is you need to do, I’m done trying, I’m going to bed,” you add pushing off the desk._

_Bucky doesn’t let you go far, his hand grabbing ahold of your arms pulling you back, his arms wrapping around you. You want to get mad, push him away, scream at him some more but you don’t have it in you. You know what’s going to happen when he sees you off to your room, you know he won’t be here when you wake in the morning, and you just want to understand why._

_“don’t do this you don’t have to,”_

_Bucky’s hands are moving from your back to cup your face, his own mere inches from yours, it’s enough to have your breath catching in your throat, “sweetheart, I’m not going to,” a lie, a lie you catch, but you know you can’t stop him._

_Your shaking your head, and he knows you know, but you just can’t bring yourself to fight him._

_Your hands are curling around the lapels of his suit, “I can’t lose another person I care about Bucky, I-”_

_Bucky surges forward, pressing his lips to your head, “and you’re not going to, I promise.” and the action is enough to have your legs threating to give out from under you._

_His lips leave your head only slightly, his eyes drifting down to you, he’s so close, and maybe it’s the moment, or the fact that your lips are just a breath away from his, but in that moment a thought crosses both of your minds. It takes all of Bucky to pull himself away from you, and even more of him to see you off to your room. You both know what comes after this, what comes in the morning._

_That night you don’t sleep, and neither does Bucky, he continues to plague your thoughts, the feelings you hold for him, threatening to push you over the edge and go to him when you hear the quiet steps of him hovering around outside of your room when the sun is barely peeking through the wakening sky._

_You don’t move, you don’t move until the world around you falls silent, you don’t move until you can no longer here the sound of his car’s engine. Once you know he’s gone, that’s when you move, quick on your feet down the steps of the stairs feet carrying you to his office, your hand immediately going to the phone, it rings once, twice, three times before his voice is sounding over the line._

_“Steve its Bucky.”_

“Why didn’t you say anything y/n?” Steve questioned.

“What could I say Steve, he was dead set on doing this, and now I know why, it didn’t make sense to me that night, why he was so dead set on going through with this, but now that Tony brought this to light it makes sense.”

Steve sighs, “god damnit Bucky,’ Steve’s turning to Stark then, “Tony do you have any sources, anything on his whereabouts is he even still alive at this point it’s been three days since he’s been missing.”

A smirk pulls at Tony’s lips, “glad you asked,” and you swore he looked like he struck gold, you and Steve couldn’t help but to look at one another brows raised at his excitement, “We were able to track Bucky’s vehicle to the same warehouse where y/n was being held by Rumlow, the one Natasha took you from y/n.”

Your brows furrowed in confusion, “why there?”

Tony tsks shaking his head, “you’re not going to like this y/n, but we think he’s baiting you,”

Your face pales, “baiting me,” you question, “what do you mean?”

“y/n he knows you and Bucky are close, that last picture has given him all the proof he needs, he knows you and the others are going to do whatever it takes to get Bucky back, so he’s made it easy for you,”

Realization dawns over you, “he drew in Bucky with these pictures and note, to get to me, except that he knew bucky would never trade a life for another, so Bucky,”

“Ran into a trap,” you and Steve muttered at the same time.

“FUCK!” Steve growls, “what are we supposed to do?” he’s asking no one in particular, but Tony answers.

“We have to play his game.”

“No,” Steve shakes his head, “absolutely not, I know what you’re thinking and we’re not going to do that, we’re not going to send y/n in, he was able to get Bucky Tony, Bucky can take Pierce you and I know that, but y/n, you’re sending her to the slaughter house, if you let her go in alone.”

“She wouldn’t go in alone, well actually yeah, yeah she would, but she’d have protective gear rogers, and we wouldn’t be far from her.”

The men begin to argue, and for you Bucky’s life is slowly ticking the longer you sit there and do nothing, he shouldn’t be in Pierces hold, it was you Pierce was really after, all this time it had been you, he’s finishing what Rumlow couldn’t.

“I’ll do it!” you speak up startling both men.

“y/n don -”

You turn to Steve, “I’ll do this Steve, you and I both know it’s me Pierce wants, so I’ll do it.”

Tony wasn’t expecting you to actually agree to this to say the least he was expecting you to give him shit, he’s stunned, “y/n maybe you should think about it a little more, this could be the end for you, you know that right.”

You nod your head, though the motion feels numb, “I’m aware, but what is there left for me here, he took everything from me, he took my family, there’s nothing left for me if he does finish Rumlows job,”

“Y/n that’s not true you have family, we’re your family,” Steve argues.

You’re giving him a warm smile, your hand reaching out for his, fingers squeezing his bigger ones, “Steve I’m going to do this, Bucky is your family, if I don’t do this and something happens to him because of me the guilt will sit with me forever,” you suck in a shaky breath, “I have the chance to save his life, in return for mine.”

“y/n Bucky wouldn’t want this, he wouldn’t want you risking your life for his, he -” Steve can’t bring himself to say it because you should be hearing these words from Bucky not Steve.

“Steve, Bucky doesn’t want me doing a lot of things, but that doesn’t mean im going to listen, Steve, I have a chance to end this once and for all, can you trust me?”

Steve does, he did, that’s why you were driving down that same, rocky dirt road Natasha had saved you from. Chills run through you as you drive down it, your heart beating faster in your chest, as you pull up to the warehouse. Three black sedans sit out in front, “shit,” you mutter as you pull in behind them, you weren’t sure what you were expecting but this hadn’t been it, you just hoped you could buy yourself enough time, so that the others could storm in.

_“Alright y/n,” tony voiced taping the tracker under your bra wire, “as soon as you arrive, I’m going to give you fifteen minutes to do whatever you need to do, to make sure you and Barnes are in a safe place before we storm the place.”_

_Your face scrunched in discomfort, as the tracker dug into your side, “define a safe place?”_

_“get away from all entrances, try and get yourselves behind something, because we’re going in guns blazing as soon as we’re with a foot of the doors.”_

_“I don’t think I thought this through.”_

_Tony grins, “I know you didn’t kid, but hey, it’s going to be okay, you just got to hold on for 15 minutes so that Pierce won’t suspect a thing, and then we’re going to rush in and get you and Bucky out of there ALIVE.”_

_“you sound so sure of yourself,” you murmur watching as he moves around you._

_“That’s because I am, you ready?” he questions._

_“as ready as I’ll ever be.”_

Now standing in front of the doors of the warehouse you weren’t so sure.

Your hands were shaking as you pulled open the door, the hinges squeaking loudly as you pulled it open. Your heart was thumping wildly in your chest as you walked in, there was no signs of anyone around, but you could hear distinct voices sounding through the large area, and it seemed to be coming from where they had held you before. Feet carrying you forward you continued to move through the poorly lit warehouse, the thumping of your heart, getting louder and louder in your ears the farther you went in.

A gasp is catching in your throat; in the center of the room is Bucky, tied up, head hanging, blood dripping, your running then, falling to your knees when your close enough to get your hands on him.

“Bucky, bucky,” your voice is frantic as you lift his head, barely open eyes meet yours, “oh Bucky why didn’t you listen to me,” you whisper eyes moving from his to assess how he’s tied up. You move behind him, he lifts his head as best as he can, “y/n you shouldn’t be here.” he murmurs.

“yeah well you shouldn’t have been here either but you didn’t listen to me, so I guess we’re fair now,” you mutter trying to pull at the knots.

“No y/n, really you shouldn’t have come I have this handled I-”

“well, well, well, she actually came,” you tense behind Bucky, your eyes watch Pierce come into view, Dot by his side. Your jaw clenches as you take her in, how proud she looks to be on the enemy side, you don’t get to your feet right away pulling the object from the inside of your heeled boot, your hands closing around Bucky’s as you transferred it to him.

You push to your feet, “well it’s me you wanted isn’t it, so here I am,”

More men begin to appear behind and on the sides of Pierce, “I’m surprised y/l/n, didn’t think you’d actually trade your life for a man like Barnes, after all he is the reason your parents are dead.”

You scoff, “funny thought that was Rumlows doing.”

“Oh it was dear, but it was Bucky who signed your poor parents’ death sentence if only your father hadn’t been such an idiot to work with the likes of hi m, looks like you followed in his steps, such a foolish girl,” he murmured moving forward.

Fuck where were the others, “your one to talk you know,” and it makes Pierce pause in his stride, “you say my father was an idiot for working for the likes of Barnes, but really he was an idiot for working for the likes of you, who kills their own men.”

Pierces jaw clenches, hands turning to fists at his sides, “you foolish girl,” he grunts, stepping forward. Your heart raced in your chest as he stormed forward, fuck there wouldn’t be enough time. He’s five feet away from you when the gunfire rings around you, some of Pierces men’s dropping to the floor in cold blood. A shriek tears from your lips as you fall to the floor, Bucky tears from his restraints, the knife you had passed him doing the job, “get up y/n,” he yells over the fire, “Pierce made a run for it, we need to get him, he’s with dot.”

You’re looking at Bucky as if he has grown three heads, what the hell, “Bucky,” you take him in despite the firing of bullets around you, “weren’t you just -” you can’t find the words because the Bucky looming over you cowering form is not the same Bucky you first saw tied to the chair.

“I told you I had it covered, now move it before we both get shot.” You want to question him but he’s tugging on your hand dragging you behind one of the various wooden boxes littered throughout the warehouse.

The gunfire gets closer as Bucky’s men barge in, Pierces men falling closer around you, “Y/n I need you to get to the others, here take this,” he’s producing a gun from behind him, your eyes go wide, “Bucky what the hell!”

He’s smiling his bloodied hand cupping your cheek, “I told you, I had this handled,” his face goes serious then, “I made you a promise you wouldn’t lose anyone else and I meant it.” you want to say something anything, but you can’t find the words.

“we need to go sweetheart, I need you to get to the others,” “but what about you?” you question watching him stand.

“I’m going after pierce this ends tonight.”

He barely lets you get a word out much less a warning before hes leaving you alone, the gunfire never ending as the guns go off around you, how many men were there.

You watch Bucky run out through the doors right past the group as if nothing “god damnit,” you growl crawling around on your knees as you follow Bucky’s trail making your way to the group.

You catch sight of Steve first his form hidden behind one of the wooden boxes beside the door. “Steve!”

He turns his head to you relief flooding his features, “Y/n thank god you’re okay,” he looks over you shoulder, “where is Bucky?” your face pales, they hadn’t seen him.

“you didn’t seem him?!” you yelled, “Bucky went after pierce Steve, Dot’s with Pierce!” Steve’s eyes widened, “did you see where he went? “out the front doors!” you yell again, “how didn’t you see him!”

“Fuck!” Steve grunts pushing to his feet hand closing around yours as he pulls you with him.

Your passing the parked sedans when you spot Bucky and Pierce off in the field, “Steve over there!” You rush out.

Steve follows your line of sight, “stay here,” he grunts dropping your hand.

“Steve no!”

He turns to you, “please y/n stay here,” Peggy isn’t losing either of us tonight, so please, just stay, I’ll bring him back to you too, he needs you just as much as you need him.” Steve’s reference to Bucky leaves you stunned, giving him an easy escape as he runs off to the field gun raised.

“So your my replacement?” Your eyes widen head snapping to the voice coming from behind you.

“Dot.” Your body turns taking a step back, body no longer shielded behind the sedan.

“I can’t see what Bucky sees in you, he sure made you sound special, when he would bring you up in our conversations, he made it real easy to put this altogether.”

Your brows furrow in confusion as you continue to step back the closer she gets to you, “ what are you talking about?”

“The week I spent with Bucky we talked more about you then anything else, he’s so taken with you and I just don’t get it, I don’t see it.” Her words are confusing you further, your feet stumbling over the dirt road sending you falling to the floor. Dot has the upper hand as she dives for you.

A grunt leaves your lips as she swings a fist to the side of your cheek, “you know Pierce was right you really were a foolish girl.” She hisses pressing your face into the gravel.

Your hands reach for her hair tugging roughly, finger nails scratching at her face, “says the one who left the man who would hang the moon and stars for her if she asked, you’re no better than Pierce!” You grunted punching a fist to her face to try and knock her off.

“You fucking bitch!” She growls slamming your head into the rock beneath you, her hands finding their way around your neck.

“I can’t wait to watch you and Bucky suffer at the hands of Pierces wrath, what a way to go, looks like Bucky will be the first to go.”

Your eyes widen hands leaving the grip she has on your throat to try and buck her off. You grab a hold of the top of her hair tugging her slightly to the side when a shot goes off.

“No, no, no!” You squeak, your hand on dots hair loosens giving her the upper hand once more. It’s getting harder to breath as you struggle to kick her off. You become desperate as your hands wave around trying to find any leverage, that’s when you feel it, the gun.

Your vision is starting to blur as you pull it from your jeans. Dots looking away from you and back into the field her brows squinting, “what the hell?” She murmurs.

She’s unsuspecting; you move the gun quickly before you can lose consciousness hoping that you have enough strength to press the trigger.

It feels like minutes have passed when the gunfire deafens you, blood splattering on your face. A gasp leaves dots lips, hands loosening around you as she falls over you. A fit of coughs take over you as you scramble to push her off, your entire body convulsing, you killed her, oh god you killed her.

This was like Rumlow all over again. A sob tears through you, as you scoot along the gravel wanting to get away from the body.

“Y/n!” Your eyes shoot up wildly Tony’s running out through the front doors the gunfire’s stopped, when did it stop.

“Shit, y/n I need you to breathe for me, it’s over your okay.”

Okay. You’re okay. It’s over.

“Steve, Bucky, I need you!” Tony yells out over you towards the field. “Steve, Bucky,” you murmur.

They were okay. They were –

Grass rustles behind you, heavy footsteps approaching you. You turn your head slightly at the sound eyes watering as you meet his gaze, a sob tears from you lips.

“Shit.” He murmurs rushing to your side nearly knocking Tony out of the way. His arms are immediately around you as he pulls you close. “It’s alright sweetheart, your okay, it’s all over now.” Bucky murmurs strong hands pulling you closer.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I- I didn’t mean too.” You cry fingers curling into his shirt.

Bucky pulls you away just slightly to get a look at you, “sweetheart you didn’t do anything wrong, you did what you needed to,”

“But dot..”

Bucky’s hands are cupping your cheek, “she would have killed you if you didn’t act y/n had I been close enough I would have been the one to fire the shot.”

Your eyes want to drift over to where she lays just feet from you, but Bucky won’t allow it. “Keep your eyes on me sweetheart,” he murmurs hands keeping your face in place, “you did good y/n” he murmurs leaning in to place a kiss to your hair, “you did real good sweetheart.”

More tears fall from your eyes as you lean into him, fingers curling deeper into his shirt. The sounds of sirens filled the air. It was over, it was finally over.


	19. Break On Through

Another sleepless night; you tossed and turned, but you couldn’t find the right position. It wasn’t that you weren’t tired, the lingering haze of sleep that sat at the back of your mind was proof enough, it was the pool of memories that your lingering sleep sat in that kept you awake at night. You wish you could shake it, shake the sight of her, the sight of her in a pool of her own blood. The guilt that lingered from that night had loomed over you like a dark and rainy cloud, it had been a week and you couldn’t shake it. Bucky had tried to talk to you, get you to listen to reason, but you knew if you let him in you would only break further. You had killed the person he loved the most, you knew he said he would have done it had he been given the chance, but there was a part of you that wasn’t believing that to be true.

A shaky breath left your lips as you kicked off the cooled sheets from your pajama clad body, the silence around you is teasing; the world around you sleeps yet here you are awake. Your body felt tight, constricted, your mind screaming at you to run and continue to run till you couldn’t anymore. Your numb feet carried you to the room, the walls around you warping ever so slightly as you continued to push yourself forward. Your hands gripped the stair railing as you ran down the stairs your breath coming out shaky as you made your way through the kitchen and out the back door. 

You try to focus on your breathing as you continue to stumble further down the yard, your sight set on the withering bench. Anxiety bubbles deep within you, making you sick. You grip the back of the bench making your way around it as you fall onto it.

The world around you is no longer silent, a buzzing sounds from you ear, buzzing, buzzing, buzzing. A choked sob falls from your lips, why did this life have to be so cruel? A choked gasp falls from your lips as you struggle to ground yourself. Your head falls to your hands where they rest on your knees, you wish you could just wake up from this nightmare, because that’s what it felt like now, one big nightmare.

A hand fell to your shoulder, and from where your head was cast down a pair of legs appeared in your sight.

“Y/n sweetheart, look at me,” you shook your head, you couldn’t meet his eyes, you’d only break further. Bucky’s hands are finding their way to your face, pulling, pulling, till he can get you to look him in the eyes.

“y/n,” he coos, “c’mere sweetheart,” he murmurs pulling you into his arms.

“I just want this feeling to go away,” you cried, “I just want it to go away, I don’t want to feel like this anymore.”

Bucky pulled you in closer embracing the best he could with his position, “why haven’t you come to me y/n, I’ve been trying for a week to get you to talk to me, look at you sweetheart,” he voiced fingers running over your wet cheeks, “you’ve reached your end, you need to let me in, let me help you y/n.”

Your shaking your head again, “it’s too much Bucky, I can’t get the image of her out of my head, and seeing you just makes it worse, I-”

Bucky’s getting in your space, hands gripping your face a little firmer, “y/n, doll I don’t blame you for what happened that night, I told you had it been me I would have done the same, y/n what dot did I wouldn’t have hesitated to put a bullet through her and you know that,, as horrible as this might sound, she did more than just betray my trust, she abused my love, and what happened to her that night we can call it karma.”

His eyes are searching your watery ones, “y/n is that why you locked yourself away in the room when we came home that night, do you think I blame you for what happened to dot?”

Your eyes water more, your voice a broken whisper, “I’m sorry,” you choke out.

Bucky’s standing then his hands wrapping around your arms as he pulls you up bringing you into a tight embrace, “y/n I don’t blame you, could never blame you for what happened to dot, everyone gets what’s coming to them in this life, and dot was no exception.”

You move your head from where it had been pressed against his shoulder to look into his eyes, “but you thought she was the one, she had changed you so much, you wanted to be better for her, to go against all you knew to make her happy.”

A lopsided smile is pulling at Bucky’s lips, his hand cupping your tear stricken cheek, “y/n were you that out of it that night that you can’t recall anything I said,” he questions, you shake your head, “you know you all get after me when I’ve spent a week with someone and you all think I’ve changed, but look at what happens to you a week without me,” he teases.

A teary chuckle escapes your lips, your head leaning into his hand, “don’t get to ahead of yourself there Barnes, and excuse me for not focusing on anything you said that night I killed another person in the span of a month, don’t think I’ve gotten to your level yet.”

Bucky laughs, “there’s my cheeky girl,” he grins, “y/n I don’t blame you for any of what happened to dot, because she didn’t matter,” your brows furrow, “sweetheart the week I spent with her really wasn’t what anyone was thinking, but I couldn’t let any of you know what it was that I was doing, if I wanted my plan to work,”

You sniffle rubbing under your eyes, “plan,” you questioned, “w-what do you mean, what plan, you had a plan aside from the one we put together, the one you messed up by going in alone?” You questioned.

“Y/n I knew all about dot being with one of Pierces men I was the one that caught them in my home, in our bed remember, aside from Steve and Peggy confirming it, I knew, but I couldn’t let anyone know I knew, or that I was accepting of this news because I knew one day Pierce would use her against me, and I knew that would be the day I could get close enough to take him down, y/n taking Pierce down has been a long time coming, long before you sweetheart, so whether this all happening because of your or not, this was bound to happen.”

Your lips part, “wait so you knew about Dot and Pierces men, but, but the Diner, the fight with Steve and the others, Bucky what, what’s going on?” Anxiety no longer resides, but confusion takes its place within you. 

“It was all a part of a plan doll, the night at the Diner, I knew dot showing up was Pierces doing, dot would have never returned to me on her own much less sought me out, and since Dot had left me for one of my own men that became one of Pierces men I put two and two together, Pierce thought of her as my weakness, the one thing that could break me, so the night she showed up at the Diner was the night I kicked my plan into place, the week I spent with dot was all for show, not only for you all but for Pierce, I knew if he saw how ‘hooked’ Dot had me that it might give him a chance to do something about it,”

“Wait so you knew that Pierce had sent in dot to take you down,” he nodded, “and the night of your accident, Pierce pretending to kidnap Dot was Pierce doing something about it?” You questioned.

“Exactly.”

Your shaking your head, “but that night that Steve brought you into the home, and all those things you said, even your behavior Bucky, you can’t tell me that week was an act.”

“Pierce had eyes and ears everywhere,” he murmured, “y/n from the moment Dot came into the Diner that evening everything I did and said had become a part of a plan to take Pierce down, it wasn’t a plan I had even planned out, I was making it up as I went along but I needed to make it as believable as possible even if that meant hurting my own.”

Your eyes fall shut as you try to wrap your mind around everything he’s telling you, “so you were leading Pierce on with that plan that we discussed before you went in alone,” you questioned eyes slipping open to look at him, he nods, “wait, wait, so the night before you left when you told me that you needed to do this alone, that was also a part of your plan, did Pierce have the home bugged or something?”

Bucky sighed, “with Pierce having been radio silent for a month, and then Dot popping up seemingly out of thin air with her girlish charm, it had taken me awhile, but the night of the accident when you took me to bed was the night I realized it, I was searching around in my nightstand when I found the first bug planted in the drawers stuck to the top, didn’t believe it till I went through the app for the security cameras that I have hidden in my room and office, it was one of the newest maids that I had hired before you moved in, she had done the job I’m assuming while I was out at your place, he had the office and my room bugged, pretty much rooms that I was in the most,”

Your eyes widen in disbelief, “I told you I had a plan sweetheart,”

“But – I,” you shake your head, “I just don’t understand how you were able to pull this together, how you were able to beat Pierce at his own game, how did you know he wasn’t going to find out?”

Bucky sighs, “Honestly I didn’t know if Pierce was going to catch on or not, but I knew I needed to try,” he sighed, “it was hard, there was nights since we met Dot at the Diner that I didn’t think any of what I was going to do would work, and you made it even harder to hold strong” he starts, “that night before I left, god did I want to tell you everything, every last little thing, but I couldn’t because I knew he was listening, I couldn’t because this would have been my only chance to get Pierce my way and not get you hurt in the process,”

Your shaking your head, “Bucky how many times have I told you that you didn’t need to do this alone, that we would have been there by your side regardless, that I would have been there by your side, this wasn’t your fight to fight alone!”

“And that’s why I had to do what I had to do.”

Your brows furrow, “what do you mean,” you questioned.

“Y/n, I did what I did so I wouldn’t have to fight this fight alone,”

“But that’s exactly what you did Bucky!” You argue.

Bucky’s laughing then, “would you let me finish,” he questions but he doesn’t give you the chance to answer as he continues, “y/n, doll, what I mean is that I don’t want to fight this fight without you by my side,” your head tilts to the side in question, “I don’t want to live this life without you.”

Your breath catches in your throat, “w-what,” you squeak.

His hand that had fallen from your cheek at one point finds its way back, his finger running over the tops of it, “sweetheart, I’ve been taken with you since the first day I met you, nobody has ever given me my shit right back, nobody has ever tried to understand this life, nobody has ever tried to understand me, nobody but you, and honestly it wasn’t long before I was wrapped up in you.”

Your hearts beating wildly in your chest, “but Dot Bucky, the week you spent with her she had you absolutely entranced, just like at the Diner, you were absolutely taken with her, none of us had seen you at all that week, how can you say you were wrapped up in me if the second she show up to the Diner you’re a puddle of goo on the floor for her!”

“Part of the plan sweetheart,” he replies with a chuckle, “ I told you if I wanted this to work it would mean hurting those I care for and that meant you, the night at the Diner you don’t know how bad I wanted to leave with you, but if I wanted Pierce to know I had taken his ‘bait’ I needed him to watch you leave, I needed him to see me spend all that time with Dot, and it had worked seeing as he caused the accident that night, but I slipped up, and the attention was drawn to you.”

“What do you mean slipped up?” You questioned.

“There was a day at the beginning of the week I spent with Dot that she had asked about you, I should have known it had probably been Pierce who asked her to bring you up, but when she did it had completely caught me off guard, so we got to talking about you, and I couldn’t bring myself to stop talking, she had even said that I was so taken with you that she couldn’t believe I had found a replacement for her, and I should have caught that as a red flag because I knew what Pierce was doing.”

“S-so the file Tony had that was filled with those pictures of me had that been a part of your plan” you questioned.

Bucky shakes his head, “the night I got those pictures I knew I had messed up, Dot was no longer his kidnapped victim not that she ever had been, his eyes were now set on you, he knew you had become the one thing I treasured most,”

Your breath catches in your throat at his statement, “a-and when had you received that envelope?” You questioned shakily.

“I received it the morning before I told you I had decided I needed to do this alone, by then I had already taken the planted bugs out and thrown them outside of the house,”

“So that afternoon that you were acting weird it’s because you knew, you knew and you were regathering yourself to take him on alone, you were reorganizing your plan,” you murmured.

“Look at you doll,” he chuckles, “you catch on pretty quick,”

“apparently not quick enough,” you muttered, a sigh leaves your lips as you bring your hands up to rest on his chest, “ I just wish you would have told us, or told me at the very least so we wouldn’t have thought you completely lost your damn mind.”

“I was just trying to keep you safe doll, that’s all I was trying to do was keep you safe I made a promise remember.” 

You huffed smacking him ever so lightly in the chest, “and I told you, you didn’t owe my father anything.” You replies glaring at him.

“I wasn’t talking about your father y/n,” you raised a brow, “I was talking about you, I made you a promise from the very beginning that I would keep you safe, and I intended on keeping that promise,”

His words are stealing your heart, your eyes avert his gaze, he chuckles lowly, the sound running through you, “you alright there sweetheart, never seen you look away so quickly, usually you’d stare me down the whole time.” 

“Maybe I’ve finally met my match,”

He’s pressing in closer his arms sliding around your waist, fingers pressing you into him, “is that so, you finally met your match?”

Your eyes slide upward from his chest, his eyes captivating you instantly, “found a guy who’s just as sweet on me as I am him.” You murmured, “would definitely call that a match.”

Bucky smiled as his hand that rested on your back drifted to your hip, it settled there pulling you impossibly closer. You inhaled sharply at being pressed so close to his warm chest, chiseled to perfection. Must he be so perfect?

“Wouldn’t say I’m perfect, I’m average if anything,” he grins, head falling to yours.

Your cheeks flame red, “wasn’t meant for you,” you murmured shaking your head, soft laughter falling from your lips.

“I’m sure it was, doll, just don’t think you meant to say it out loud,”

A groan left your lips as you pushed against him, breathing him in. Bucky angled his head slightly nose brushing against yours, your breath hitched in your throat as his lips got closer and closer to yours. Your lips parted on their own accord, breath mingling with his. Your heart fluttered inside your chest fingers curling around the back of his shirt.

“You’re not going to push me away are you?” he murmured lips brushing against yours.

You can’t find the words; but your quick to shake your head a breathy chuckle falling from his lips as he pressed his lips to yours.

It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words could never be. His hand that rested on your hip caressed the velvet skin there, the feeling had you inching closer your own fingers digging softly into the skin of his back pulling until there was no space left between the two of you, until you could feel his heart beating to the rhythm of your own.


	20. Sweet Hereafter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter left!

The sun peaks through the drawn curtains adding an orange glow to the morning light casted over you.

The start of a new day.

Golden rays soak your skin as you adjust yourself on the warm bed, body seeking out that additional warmth, that your sheets can’t provide you.

His face was rugged, but not in an  overworn way, no, in a way that tells of a life too hard. A hard life lived, the gentleness and kindness hidden behind the rugged exterior. It still surprised you that the man lying next to you was the notorious mob boss who had standards to live up to, because the one you knew was kind, he was safe.

An eye cracks open, arms tugging you in closer when he sees your warm eyes staring back, “Your staring sugar,” he murmurs pressing his lips to your head.

Your hands find their way to his cheeks rubbing over the stubble that kisses his skin, “can’t help it,” you murmur quietly thumb running over his pink lips, “you’re just so pretty it’s not fair.”

Bucky chuckles lowly, warm breath hitting your fingers, large hand squeezing your hip, “look who’s talking.” He presses in close his nose rubbing against yours, lips falling over yours in soft kiss, your lips move languidly against his, content sighs spilling from your lips as your fingers curl into his hair. He’s grinning into the kiss, his body flipping you under him, and god you could stay like this forever, under him, feeling the solid mass of muscle securing you to his bed.

His lips leave yours trailing down the side of your neck, drawing out soft moans from you, “mmm, Buck,” you laugh fingers tugging softly at his long locks to pull him away from your sensitive neck.

“Bucky,” you squeal, laughter spilling from your lips, “come on doll, you don’t want me to stop, do you?” he questions teeth nipping at your ear.

And you don’t want him to stop, but it’s Friday, and Peggy and Steve will be here soon, there's still the never-ending pile of files to flit through, a moan falls from your lips when he sucks a bruise into your neck, “Bucky,” you moan in protest, “Steve and Peggy will be here soon, we can’t,” you laugh pushing at his shoulders but it's to no avail, not that you were really trying that hard to push him off.

Bucky nips at you shoulder before he’s looking up at you through his lashes, and your breath catches in your throat, he really was such a beautiful man It wasn’t fair.

“I gave them the day off, told them to meet us at your favorite Diner later, so we have time.”

Your raising a brow at him, “and when were you going to tell me that I didn’t have to up so early?”

“I was thinking after your first orgasm, but then I thought maybe after your second or third.” he grins fingers ghosting up your exposed side.

You shiver under his touch , “bold of you to assume I would have still been in bed for that .”

He raises a brow, eyes still trained on yours as he leans down to press his lips to the exposed ski n of your chest, “I don’t see you making much of an attempt to move,” he murmured, “if  anything you  seem very comfortable where you are,” he grins, fingers skimming over the tops of your bra hooking before he’s pulling down, exposing you to the cool air of the room .

Your breath catches in your throat as he leans in, tongue gliding up your skin, his mouth covering your nipple, tongue rolling over it before his teeth are sinking into the skin.

A hiss falls from your parted lips, your back arching pressing your chest further into his mouth. Bucky chuckles against your skin, letting your bra fall back into place as he slides down pulling the silk sheets of his bed down your body to get at the hidden skin. Your body writhes at the feel of his open-mouthed kisses against your heated skin, head dipping down further until he's mouthing around the skin just above your panties.

“Bucky please,” you breathe.

Bucky chuckles fingers hooking into the sides, “since you asked so nicely,” he grins, pulling, pulling till the obstructive material is further down your legs out of the way. He can’t help but to stop and stare at your mostly bare body, eyes skimming from your slightly parted legs, up the expanse of your torso till his eyes are finding yours. A smile pulls at his lips when he sees the pink kissing your cheeks, “what?” you murmur, and he never thought the day he would see you looking so shy, so unsure around him.

He shakes his head, body moving forward to fall over you his arms supporting his body above yours, “there’s just something about you.”

Your hand comes up to rest against his arms, “care to elaborate?”

Bucky thinks back to the first night he ever brought you into his home, the night in the garden, “you remind me of the kinder things in life, and that's something I want to hold on to, I want to hold on to you.”

Your cheeks turned a darker shade, a bright smile taking over your lips, his heart skips a beat in his chest at the sight of you, “is it because you need someone to keep you in check and I'm the only one who won’t take your shit?”

He laughs at your reply, he can feel the nervousness radiating from you, can almost hear the beating of your racing heart, “that's part of the reason,” he teases back, “but not quite; you’ve been a breath of fresh air y/n, and you’ve been there not only for me, but for our family, you’ve brought out the side of me that I hadn’t seen since Dot, and I don’t want to lose sight of that, I don’t want to lose sight of you, I'm sweet on you doll.”

A grin tears your lips, head leaning up to press your mouth to his, “you're not so bad yourself Barnes,” you whisper into his lips.

His lips part from yours, “not sweet on me anymore sugar?” he questions

“Oh,” he questions, “well that just won’t do,” he murmurs, pressing his lips to yours for a brief second before there skimming down your neck, lips right by your ear, “let me show you that I really am worth all the trouble,” he husks nipping at your ear before descending down further.

He slides between your parted legs, placing your legs over his shoulders, strong hands gripping your hips, “stay still for me sugar,” he knew you were anything but still, when his head was between your legs. His lips skimmed across your inner thigh nipping, and sucking at the sensitive skin.

“James please,” you whine.

You catch his toothy grin, before he’s dipping down, warm breath fanning against your cunt. His tongue flattens against your core, licking a stripe, he does it again his tongue slipping between your folds this time drawing a moan from you as he swirls the tip of his tongue against your clit. Your hands grip his that rest on your hips as you buck up into his mouth, he sucks the sensitive bundle of nerves between his lips, drawing a gasp from you, your head falling back to the pillow.

“F-fuck Jesus Bucky!”

Bucky chuckles, the vibration causing you to jolt in his hold, “grab a hold of something doll,” he murmurs and your brows furrow, but then his tongue is delving into the warm wet heat of your cunt, “Oh god!” you groan, fingers curling into his hair. He pulls away only to slip two fingers into your slick heat fucking into you with precise precision. Your eyes slip shut, mouth falling open breathy moans spilling from your lips. There’s a shift on the bed and when your eyes slip open he’s above you, fingers still working into you. He leans down to press his lips to yours drinking in your moans, you pull away with a gasp, “going to cum sweetheart?” he murmurs feeling you tighten around him your desperate moans of pleasure spurring him on.

“Oh god Buck please,” you gasp gripping his arm; your close to coming, right on the edge of falling over.

Bucky’s thumb slides through your wet folds seeking out the pleasurable bundle of nerves that will have you falling apart on his fingers. He’s rubbing over you in tight, quick circles that send waves of pleasure washing over you. The coil in your stomach becomes tighter before it snaps; your orgasm hits you hard pleasure washing over you. Your mouth splits open in a breathy gasp, fingers digging into his arms. Bucky fucks you through your orgasm, his mouth drowning out your moans of pleasure as he slips his fingers from you. Soft  sighs of aftershock pleasure fall from your lips, your hands snaking their way around his back to pull him closer. Lips pressing further into his, you deepen the kiss, tongue running over his lower lip.

Tongues dance slowly with one another, his hands roam the curves of your body, fingers press into your waist as he pulls his lips away from yours, a gasp falling from his lips as he pulls air back into his lungs. Your naked hips rock against his clothed one needing to feel the weight of his cock against your aching core, a shiver rolls through him at the low moan falling from your lips, his dick twitching with want. His head presses to yours eyes connecting, a warm smile pulls at your lips, fingers sliding across his face, finding their way into his hair as you pull him down. “I need you,” you whisper lips brushing against his. He leaves you momentarily to work his briefs before he’s slotting back against you his hand hooks around your thigh as he brings it up to rest around his hips. A moan is falling from both your lips as the new position allows for the head of his cock to press into your folds, his hips roll forward the tip brushing against your aching clit.

Hand leaving your thigh it snakes it’s way between your bodies to grab a hold of his cock. Dragging it through your slick folds he presses into your warm heat, a moan is falling from your lips as he bottoms out, your lips connecting with his.

“Fuck sugar,” he moans against your lips, “feel so perfect.” 

He doesn’t move at first enjoying the feeling of you fluttering and clenching around him. He’s lost on you and how you feel around him, everything about you is so damn beautiful. His hands come up to cup your cheek, thumb running over the swell of your lower lip, “so fucking beautiful,” he murmurs.

Your breath hitches in your throat, heart swelling in your chest, “please move, I need you to move,” you reply your own hands running over stubble of his beard.

His hips retreat from yours, cock sliding out from within you till only the tip is left. His lips are pressing to yours, hips surging forward as he builds up a slow rhythm. Your hands leave his face to wrap around his back, fingers digging into the warm skin there pulling him impossibly closer to you. Low grunts are falling from his lips as he fucks up into you, your other leg hooking around his waist to get him deeper. 

His head finds its way to your neck lips searching out that hidden sweet spot that will have you coming undone in his arms, his thrusts have picked up speed, a steady speed which draws the sweetest groans of pleasure falling from your lips. He could listen to those sounds falling from your sinful lips for the rest of his life if you would let him.

His lips draw away from your neck needing to see you fall apart from him as he continues to bring you closer to that sweet release. Your lips are parted open, eyes covered over in lust, but there’s something more there, something that has his heart stalling in his chest, because he swears, you’re looking at him like he just hung the stars for you.

“gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous,” he whispers to himself, “look at you sweetheart,” he grunts hips picking up speed, “you’re an absolute angel.” His hand searches for yours on the bed grasping it in his as he pushes you deeper into the bed, his whole body consuming you.

He’s thrusting hard, deep, burying himself in you, your walls fluttering around him as your orgasm approaches. Your head pushed forward, lips finding his shoulder as you kiss the small but none the less scarred skin there, an intimate motion that has Bucky’s head reeling. You really were his breath of fresh air you saw him for much more than he actually was. 

“James please,” you whine low in your throat, pressing warm wet kisses into his skin. He picks up speed needing to bring you to that release, a particularly deep thrust has you falling apart around him, your body falling over the edge, your orgasm washing over you. Long low moans are falling from your parted lips, fingers clawing at Bucky’s back as he fucks you through the pleasure. His name falls from your lips in a silent prayer, you’re pleading, you need to feel him, you need him to cum for you.

Bucky pushes your further into the mattress, his jaw clenching as his orgasm washes over him, his stomach muscles tense, as he spills into you, warm spurts filling your core, he never wants this feeling to end. Not wanting to crush you he goes to move away but your legs keep him locked with you, “stay,” you murmur in your post orgasmic haze.

Your arms pull him down, his head falling to your chest, your heart beating away wildly in your chest. Your fingers run through his chocolate locks, lips pressing into his hair. 

The only sound in the room is that of your breaths, his head leaves your chest eyes looking up at you, his finger runs over your face softly, “you sweet on me now doll?” he questions with a toothy grin.

Breathy laughter falls from your lips, fingers tugging at his locks, he moans low in his throat, “I’ve been sweet on you for a while now Barnes, thought you knew I had a thing for mysterious mob bosses.”

“I had an idea,” he murmurs as he moves his way up your body, “I just wanted to make sure, wanted to be thorough,” he hums hand squeezing your side as he presses his lips to yours.

“keep those hands to yourself Buck, we have to meet Peggy and Steve soon,” you laugh.

His lips press deeper into yours, “we have time sweetheart; besides I want to love on you a little more.”

“How about you love on me in the shower, unless you want to explain to Peggy and Steve why we’re late.”

Bucky slips away from you much too quickly as he makes a beeline for the master bathroom. You can’t help but to dwell in your mind a bit at how suddenly he took off after mentioning bringing up to Peggy and Steve your reason for being late, it had been a week since the kiss you shared in the garden that night and things between you had become heated rather quickly, but Bucky Barnes had loved on you with such a passion that you couldn’t resist him.

“You coming sweetheart!” he calls out over the sound of the running shower.

Not wanting to let you mind wander into the darker parts of your mind you slip from his bed, fingers working off your bra as you make your way into the bathroom, leaving the door open a crack.

Bucky looked like an absolute dream, well the parts that you could see that weren’t obstructed by the wall he was hidden behind. He grins when he catches you staring at the water running down his broad shoulders, “c’mere, there’s only so much you can see from behind the wall.”

You shake your head a smile pulling at your lips as you pull open the glass door, stepping in, his arms immediately pulling you in. A content moan falls from your lips as the warm water hits cascading down your body.

Bucky’s lips once more found their way onto your heated skin, “mmm,” you groan head falling to the side to allow him more access. He chuckled against your skin, his hands gripping your hips, “something on your mind doll, took you awhile to run on in here,”

You debate on whether to tell him, “it's nothing, just thinking about things,” you reply, your arms winding around his back.

The corner of Bucky's mouth twitches in a small smile, “you gonna have me play twenty questions to figure out what is going on in that mind of yours?” he questions.

You look away from his eyes, but his hand is there to pull you right back in, “you know you can tell me anything right, you don’t have to hide things from me, thought we established this.”

“I know it's just-” you chew on your lower lip, should you tell him, what if your concern was nothing, but what if it was? I mean you hadn’t exactly put a label on what the two of you were, could it really be that bad to be curious about something you hadn’t touched based on? You sucked in a breath, “what are we?”

Your question takes Bucky by surprise, and he can’t help but to chuckle, “y/n, doll, what do you mean what are we, you don’t know?” he questions genuinely surprised you would even have to ask.

“well if I'm even having to ask,” you murmur bringing your fingers up to play with the wet hair at the nape of his neck.

“oh sweetheart,” he coos bringing his hands to cradle your face, “I assumed that night and the past week would have been answer enough, I mean you haven't left my room since the first night,” he laughs.

“YOU haven't let me leave.” you chuckled, “it’s just we didn’t actually say where we stood, you kind of just kissed me before whisking me off to your room.”

“are you complaining?” he questions teasingly.

You yank at his hair, “you know I'm not,” you mutter, “but since we didn’t say that we were actually together,” warmth kisses your cheeks, at the thought “I just couldn’t help but wonder since you practically bolted from the bed as soon as I brought up you needing to tell Steve and Peggy why we were late, it almost felt like we were keeping it a secret, I’m sorry,” you sigh, “its dumb.”

“y/n, sweetheart, no,” he murmurs, “that’s not dumb, your feelings are not dumb, sweetheart of course this is a thing, how many times have I told you, I'm sweet on you sugar, I'm sorry If I made you think otherwise.”

You shake your head, “it’s not - you didn’t,” you get out, “I guess I got a little insecure, and read too much into you leaving the bed so quickly.”

Bucky presses his head to yours, “y/n, the only reason I left that bed so quickly was to get in here fast enough so that I could take you against the wall.”

“Bucky!” you laugh, “it's true,” he chuckles, “sweetheart I'm sweet on you and I'm sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but I consider you my girl, I guess I didn’t think to say anything because it's not something I've ever had to say, I’m usually straight forward with my emotions if you haven’t noticed.”

“I’ve noticed,” you laugh, “I'm sorry if I ruined the mood,”

“you didn’t ruin anything sweetheart,” he replies leaning down to press his lips to yours in a short yet sweet chaste kiss. He’s wiping away at the water on your face, “look sweetheart, you’re my girl, it's been official for me since that night, and now you know, and if you’d like for those around us to know as well I’ll gladly tell them, hell I'd scream it at the top of my lungs for you, if it’s going to make you happy, because that’s all I want, you’ve brought me more happiness than I've had in a long while, and it’s all I want to bring you now.”

Your head rests against his, a warm smile pulling at your lips, “who knew you were such a sap,” you chuckle.

“Only for you sweetheart,” he grins, “but really if you want me to announce that you’re my girl you don’t have to ask twice.”

You shake your head, “that’s fine Buck, as long I know, which now I do,” you laugh, “that's all that matters, besides I’m sweet on you too.”

He’s grinning as he pulls you in closer, the water no longer sliding between your bodies from your closeness, “is that so, you sweet on me?”

You nod your head, pressing up onto your toes to press your lips to his, a soft moan spilling from his lips.

“holy shit!”

Your eyes are snapping open at the sound of Steve’s voice, Bucky groans pulling away from your lips, “Rogers you ever heard of knocking, m’tryin to enjoy a nice shower with my girl get out.”

Your cheeks are flaming red, but laughter falls from your lips, your head falling to Bucky's shoulder, “don’t have to tell me twice he,” he mutters, “but hurry up Peggy and I won’t be waiting too long for you two!” Steve calls out as he shuts the door, there's a pregnant pause before your hearing Steve’s voice call out again, “welcome to the family y/n,  Goodluck getting out this time, you’re stuck with us forever now!”

Laughter falls from yours and Bucky’s lips, his find yours in the stream of the shower, when you  part he breathes you in, crystal blue eyes staring back at you, “you know Steve wasn’t kidding,” your head cocks to the side in question, “you're stuck with us forever, with me.”

You pull him in again his lips just above yours, “I wouldn't mind, I wouldn’t mind that at all,” you murmur, sealing your words with a kiss to his lips.


	21. Every Thug Needs A Lady

“Y/n, babe,  you need to relax unless you want to give everything away,” Peggy mu rmured rubbing at your shoulders.

“What if this isn’t the right thing to do, what if he absolutely loses it, what if he hates me for doing this  Peggy I should just tell him.”

Peggy turned you, your eyes meeting her concerned ones, she patted your cheek lovingly, “y/n I  guarantee  Bucky will not lose it,  that man loves you, and it hasn’t even been a year,  and if he does  lose it  it’s not in the way  you're expecting him to ” she sighs squeezing your arm, “ y/n if I knew this was a bad idea I would have shut it down the second you brought it up to me , but it’s not,  Bucky needs this, just like he needed you, like we’ve needed you , you’ve  done so much for all of us y/n, and this, this just shows us, will show him how much you care. ”

You give her a heartfelt smile, your own hands covering hers, “ oh Peggy I-”

“I think our girls are trying to escape with one another,” Peggy and you look to the office doors.

“I don’t know Rogers I feel like I’m staring at us, except  they’re prettier to look at.” Bucky adds with a chuckle.

You and Peggy separate  from one another, Peggy moving towards Steve, Bucky moving towards you, he’s taking you into his arms, left hand wrapping around your waist, right hand cupping at your cheek, “is it true sugar, you trying to escape on me.” soft laughter falls from your lips, your arms falling around his neck fingers curling around his hair.

“If I was really trying to run off with Peggy I guarantee neither of you would know.” you reply looking over Bucky’s shoulder to Steve.

Bucky’s hands are pulling your attention back to him, “and I guarantee the two of you wouldn’t get that far sweetheart, you under estimate the lengths I would go to  to  make sure that doesn’t happen, the lengths Steve would go to.”

Your raising a brow at the mention of Steve’s name, “i have no doubt of the lengths you would go to, but Steve,” you murmur looking at the man wrapped around Peggy’s smaller frame, “Steve wouldn’t hurt a fly.” you grin teasingly.

“you underestimate the lengths I would go to y/n,” Steve replies mockingly throwing Bucky’s same words back at you.

Laughter spills from your lips, “Hey,” bucky murmurs pinching your side lightly, “don’t laugh doll, it ain’t funny.”

“I promise I'm not laughing at you,” you chuckle pressing up on your toes to press your lips to his cheek, but he’s quick to move and catch your lips instead.

“I swear I can never get used to that,” you hear Steve murmur, Bucky parts from your lips ever so slightly, “if you don’t like it, you can go wait for me outside, give your own girl some lovin.”

“oh, you don’t have to tell us twice,” you hear Peggy’s voice, “come on Roger’s, come and love me something sweet.” 

Your shaking your head a grin splitting your lips as Bucky’s lips capture yours, he hums against your mouth fingers squeezing you a little tighter, pulling you in a little closer. “wish you wouldn’t have darted from the bed so early this morning, sugar, I could have loved on you something sweet too.”

The reminder of why you had darted so early from bed this morning sits heavy on your chest, and you’re a breath away from giving in and spilling your shared secret with Peggy.

“well I couldn’t exactly have Peggy and Steve waiting outside of our home in this heat Barnes it would be an unruly thing.”

Bucky’s lips split into a grin, eyes twinkling in delight, what did you say?

“ _ our _ home,” he questions, your eyes widen at his words, “uh- I- I'm sorry I-” his hands are cradling your face lips crashing to yours cutting off your rambling panic.

Your fingers curl into the sides of his shirt, “you like the sound of that,” he hums, “like the sound of our home?”

Your quick to nod pulling away to look into those blue eyes you’ve grown to love so much, “well you’ve had me captive here for a little more than two months, and then you kept me captive in your bed for five more months so can you blame a girl for getting a little comfortable.” 

Bucky chuckles head resting against yours, “no, no I don’t think I can blame  _ my girl  _ for getting comfortable, so I'm assuming plans of rebuilding your family home is off the table?”

_ “ _ that was a thing,” you questioned teasingly, “when we re you going to inform me of this?”

“You want the truth?” He questions hands falling around you waist .

“Wouldn’t expect anything less since we’ve been so honest with each other .”

_ Hypocrite. _

“That night we took down Pierce I had every intention of letting you go, of giving you that out out of this life and had things been much differently believe me when I say I would have sweetheart,” he breathes a breath of air, “but y/n that first night in the garden when you promised me all those things you not once broke your promise to me, not once, even the moments when I deserved it you stuck around, and you fought for me, you fought with me, and that night when I had every intention of telling you that I would rebuild your family home, but there was the part of me that grew selfish,”

You titled your head, selfish?” 

“yeah doll, I got selfish, you really were a breath of fresh air, and you had brought me and those closest to me so much happiness that I couldn’t let that go, I didn’t want the only thing that remotely turned all my bad days around go, but then when you avoided me  fo nearly a week after that night with Pierce I worried that I may have pushed you too far, so once again that night in the garden I had every intent of letting you go, but I wasn’t going to let you go without at least trying.”

Your heart constricted in your chest, hands leaving his sides they take ahold of his face, thumb running over the stubble adorning his cheeks, “I’m glad you didn’t tell me, I don’t think I could bring myself to leave you.”

A grin you’ve grown to love splits his lips, a look of an absolute love taking over his eyes, “you sweet on me?”

Laughter bubbles from your lips head dipping back slightly, “it's a shame you even have to ask, have I not shown you enough.” 

“I wouldn’t be opposed to being shown more,” he murmurs dipping his head to trail along your exposed neck. A shiver rolls through you, his arms tightening around your waist more, a smile pressed into your skin. His lips are searching for yours, mere inches from pressing down when Peggy’s voice sounds from the door, “sorry to pull you away from your girl Barnes, but you and Steve are needed.”

Bucky groans head knocking against yours softly, “to be continued,” you chuckled softly.

“Everyone is taking the day off tomorrow, and I am locking you away in my room and keeping you in bed till all hours of the afternoon, you're not allowed to leave.” he murmurs head dipping to press his lips softly to yours.

“Wouldn’t expect anything less, now go before Steve keeps you longer than necessary,” though for things to go right you needed him too.

Peggy and you walked Bucky to the door, one final kiss pressed to your lips before he was gliding down the steps both parties waving to one another as the men drove off in the black sedan. Once the men were out of sight the door was quietly closed behind the two of you, Peggys eyes meeting yours as she leaned against the wall, “she’s on her way.”

To say you were nervous was the understatement of the year, your nerves were frayed; anxiety building as you constructed out different ways this evening could end, you were sure things would turn out fine but there that little voice in the back of your mind nagging that whispered  eerily you were doomed to fail.

“y/n, will you stop pacing, you're going to dig yourself a path through the carpet, please sit, everything is going to be fine.” Peggy tried to reassure, but it only made your pace quicken. Back and forth, back and forth.

“are you sure this is the same y/n, y/l/n Steve was telling me about because I am not seeing the one Steve described to me.”

Your eyes are snapping towards the two women, the second Peggy’s hissing out her name, “Rebecca Barnes!”

“what at least it got her to stop pacing, look.” she grins pointing at your frozen form.

“are you as insufferable as your brother?”

Rebecca grins wildly, and you swear your looking at Bucky in girl form, “I mean the two of us were pretty inseparable, it was always a package deal, two for one.”

“tell me the deal has expired.”

If it's possible her grin  grows wider, her finger waggling at you as if she knows something you don’t and she's thoroughly rubbing it in. “I can see why my brother’s so taken with you,” your brows furrow at her statement, “Steve told me a lot when he managed to track me down thanks to you,” she shrugs.

“thank you by the way,” Becca raises a brow in question, “honestly I wasn’t sure how anyone would take me wanting to bring you out of the dark, to drag you back into a life you’d been out of for so long, I really did think you would say no when Steve said he had managed to track you down.”

Becca nods in understanding, “if I'm being honest I did tell Steve no, I told him hell no actually,” she sighs, “you were right to think I wouldn’t come, I had been out of this life for so long but because I knew Pierce would have caught word as soon as my father kicked me out, I had to get away, had to hide but not completely, which is how Steve found me, wish my brother was half as smart as that man,” she muttered earning her a swat in the arm from Peggy, “be nice.”

Becca chuckled, anyway when Steve was able to get ahold of me he informed me that you and my brother had managed to take down the absolute menace that Pierce was and that it would be safe for me to do this, I won’t lie I was still extremely iffy on saying yes but when Steve told me the little he had about you, I couldn’t pass up meeting you, from what I've heard you’ve done a lot for our family, a lot for my brother, so if anyone should be thanking someone it should be me to you, our parents would have loved you.”

Your heart skips a beat in your chest at the mention of their parents, your eyes blinking a little too rapidly to will away the tears, “Steve just texted me,” Peggy speaks up, “they’re on  there way.”

You and Becca suck in a breath, your eyes flit over to hers, “you ready,” you question, “are you,” she shoots back.

You shook your head ‘no’ but still moved forward to grasp at her hands and pull her up onto her shaky legs, you’re turning to Peggy then, “send him out back as soon as he gets here will you.”

Peggy smiles at you softly, “you don’t have to worry, we all know the first person he’s going to look for is you, and as soon as I tell him you’re out in the garden that’s the first place he’s going to go.” 

Peggy pats your cheek, her arms winding around your shoulder as she pulls you in for a tight hug, “so grateful to have had you come in our life,” she murmurs into your ear before she’s pulling back to look at you, “although I wish the circumstances would have been differently  I'm so glad you’re here with us, our little breath of fresh air.”

You squeeze her as best as you can with your hands still in Becca's, “I'm glad to be here with all of you too, wish us luck,” you murmured unwinding yourself from her hold, pulling Becca along as you made your way through the kitchen and out the back doors.

“god I didn’t realize how much I missed this place,” Becca spoke up as you walked with her down the path, “if there was anything that I loved about this home, it was this garden, me and Bucky would spend hours back here just goofing around, well until dad took him under his wing and decided to show him the line of work.”

You watched as she took a seat on the rickety bench your form going behind her to obstruct her from anyone’s view, “do you wish it would have been different for you and Bucky?”

She looks out at the garden before she looks up at you, “for me no, for Bucky yes, my brother deserved a childhood, he deserved to enjoy his teen years, not stress over whatever my father was doing behind the closed office doors, he was thrown into this shit so young, and I saw how messed up it got him at times, I just wish I could have done more, I wish I could have told him I would be okay, that I was going to be just fine, I know me getting thrown out that night really did a number on him, then with Dot, I – he just suffered  too much.”

Your hand falls to her shoulder squeezing, her hand falling above yours, “I couldn’t agree with you more,” you start, “but he’s come such a long way,  haven't know him as long as you or the others, but I know you’d be proud.”

“and we have you to thank for that,”  you're looking at her in question, “Steve told me enough y/n, and the fact that you would do this for my brother, it tells me a lot too, you care for him, you really do.”

And you knew that you felt so much more for Bucky than just caring for his  well-being , you loved him.

Your lips part to tell her, but a voice calling out your name has you freezing, your heart pounding heavily in your ears.

“Y/n, sugar,” bucky calls out cheerily, and the sound makes your heart swell, “Peggy said I would find you out here I-” silence.

You glance down slightly to see Becca peering behind you, her hand locked around yours tightly, squeezing, you gather up the courage to turn.

Bucky stands feet away from you frozen in place, hands loose at his side as he looks at his sister, watery eyes meet yours, “w-what?”

You find your feet as you move towards him slowly, wary of his reaction his eyes solely on yours now, “I- I know you probably weren’t expecting this, and honestly I didn’t think this would fall through in the end, but I wanted to do this for you, you finally took down pierce, you have your family, but not all your family, and I remembered the night in the garden that you told me about her, and I just had t-”

He’s rushing towards  you arms going around your anxious form, his lips pressing to the side of your head, a shaky breath spilling from his lips as he grips you in his hold, “thank you sweetheart, thank you so much, god I can’t believe,” he pulls away from you, but still keeps you close as he looks at Becca.

Becca much like her brother has tears pooling in her eyes a few rolling down her cheeks, she stands on shaky legs as she rounds the rickety bench. Theres a baited breath before he’s pulling away from her and there both running at each other, arms wrapping around one another as soon as  there bodies collide.

There’s quiet, choked sobs, of ‘I'm so sorry’, ‘I missed you so much’ and ‘I should have done more’, spilling from both the sibling's lips as they embrace one another tightly. You can’t help the first tear that slips from your eyes as you watch them, there was no man more deserving of a moment so special such as this then James Buchanan Barnes.

Your feet slowly carry you back as you let the siblings reunite and have a moment to themselves. Your wiping under your eyes when two arms fall around you, one coming from your left, the other from your right, you turn your head to find both Peggy and Steve by your side watching the sight before you. Steve squeezes you as best as he can, “you know I've never seen Bucky cry until today,” a pause your glancing up at him, “I'm totally going to hold this over him.”

A snort spills from your lips, “hold this over me and I have plenty of embarrassing moments to hold over you,” you look over to Bucky who is walking over, his arm placed around Becca.

Once they are close  enough he’s releasing Becca who get pulled into Steve’s side, Bucky grabbing at your arms as he pulls you away from them.

“you three mind giving me and y/n a few minutes?” he questions.

They give a silent agreement, Becca calling out as they walk back towards the home, “hurry up we have shit to catch up on.”

Bucky and you chuckle, softly, a silence following as he waits to see the doors close behind them, you can only assume they are out of sight when his eyes finally meet yours, “your something you know,” he starts, “I knew there was something special about you from that very first day we met, and now I know I was right,” a shaky sigh leaves his lips, “doll I can’t thank you enough for this, I didn’t even think you would remember the night I told you about Becca, I didn’t think - I-” and you knew what he was trying to say. “Every good thing in my life has always been ripped away from me, whether it be something I had no control over, or something I didn’t fight hard enough for, there was a never a happy ending for me in this life, not until I met you.”

You let out a teary chuckle your hand coming to rest on his wet cheek, “James if there is anyone that is more deserving of happiness, that is you, I love you.”

Bucky freezes, lips parting as he stares at you in shock, “w-what did you say,” he questions, a smile tugs at your lips as you move in closer, pressing into him as your lips find his, “I said I love you.”

You hear Bucky’s breath hitch in his throat, his hands sliding up your body to cup your face, “oh sugar,” he murmurs, “sugar, sugar, sugar,” he coos each word pressed into your lips, 

“I love you too, I love you so damn much.”

It's when his lips finally press to yours, tongue  beckoning yours that your thankful you never headed your fathers warnings.


End file.
